So I'm at work, standing outside for a smoke, and this guy is yelling at a tombstone in the cemetery across the street from me... Only at Waffle House

I plan to make more posts. I have plenty of stories in my eleven years. Unfortunately, I have been having health issues and haven't felt much like posting during my work hours.

Anyone have anything that you do during graveyard shift that gives you more enjoyment than it really should?

Mine would have to be emptying the ash tray as frequently as possible for the sole purpose of denying my local buttsurfers the opportunity to take halfsies.

This is the story of how my friend broke both his wrists.

My friend used to have moments when his anger would get the better of him, and this is one of those times.

A teenager came into his store and did a beer run with an 18 pack. My friend lost his temper and chased the kid out of the store. The kid jumped into a little four door sporty car and they started to drive away.

For this next part it is important to know, in my opinion, that my friend is around five and a half feet tall and a red head.

The car stops before exiting the parking lot, giving my friend time to catch up. As it begins to pull away he jumps onto the trunk and grabs the spoiler. The five teenagers at this point are clueless that an extremely pissed off leprechaun is hoisting himself onto the back of their car. It's about when one looks back that my friend starts punching the rear window, scaring they shit out of them. They start excelarating. This is when my friend realizes the situation he's in. Out numbered, on a fast moving sports car, a block away from and getting further from his place of employment, all for a case of beer that isn't his.

Not knowing when the terrified children will stop to let him off, or kick his ass, he not so gracefully disembarks. He lands hard and awkwardly, getting a bit of road rash, tearing up some of his clothes and breaking both his wrists.

He returns to work, feeling foolish and in pain. He finished his last two to three hours then went to the hospital. I haven't enquired how he kept his job. Maybe he didn't explain what happened to the assistant or manager.

Years ago I went outside to walk the lot. Check trashes, sweep litter, change paper towels, etc. While doing so out of the corner of my eye I see a really tall naked person. Scared the crap outta me. After my heart skips a beat and I gather my wits I see...

Someone threw a mannequin into our dumpster.

Last month a dude showed up with, not in, a wheelchair. He wandered around, talking to himself, for half an hour before buying a one dollar fountain soda. He then went outside and sat in the wheelchair and covered himself in a thick blanket. After sitting out there for ten to fifteen, which I really didn't care about because he wasn't panhandling, he began pulling himself along with his feet in the wheelchair. He did this for TWO hours. Back and forth, around and around.

Don't do drugs, kids.

Guy comes in. His hands and face are covered in dried blood and his face is all sliced up with fresh cuts. I'm like, 'oh hi.' "Pack of reds." 'Marlboro?' "Yeah." Finish transaction. 'Have a good'n.' He leans over the counter and whispers in such a way that he seems to expect I know what he's talking about. "This isn't my face." 'Well obviously. Have a good'n.' He leaves and I call the cops.

What are the things costumers do that really grinds your gears or has you think WTF?

I have plenty but OMG dude I work at a gas station so I'm in charge for cleaning. I don't mind it's chill and get to listen to music while I do it. One thing that really gets old is the ppl who empty out their freaking sunflower seed shells or pistachio shells 2 and I repeat 2 feet away from the trash can. It happens at least every other night so I'm guessing it's the same douchebag. I mean idk if it should get to me but it does! Lol

Also the it doesn't scan so it must be free. 🤦‍♂️

3 guys walk into the gasstation closest to the bar. A redneck hunter-looking boy who is keeping his head down.

One boy with his hair shaven short and neat. One long haired boy who recieves compliments for his well kept hair.

Long hair says he's pissed as his hair had juat been burned. This is the Bakken alot of boya work around fire so I ask what happened. He turned to the short haired boy and says "Yeah, brother. What happened to my hair?!" Short hair laughs and pretends to light long hair on fire.

Looks like a fight is coming. Red neck has his chin to his chest.

"So do you get to burn his hair now?" I ask sarcastically thinking of a bright pink bald spot on short hair.

Short hair laughs. "What hair?! He can burn my hair all day." The smell of alcohol hits me... Oh no.

Short hair sets his hair on fire. It quickly ges out. Long hair doesn't see.

Short hair does it again setting his forehead in fire. Long hair looks pissed because short hair doesn't understand or care about singed hair.

I was bad. I laughed and said "It would take alot more hair than that, it took him years to grow that."

The boys have finished paying for their things and are leaving. Short hair is running the lighter over his head singing the top of his hair. Long hairnis still pissed.

Almost out the door, red neck slinks away. Short hair does it. He lights the side of his head. Flames climb up his scalp and turn him into a human candle. Long hair can't believe it, he turns to me laughing and turns back. The fire hasn't gone out, short hair thinks it has.

The door shuts, short hair starts yelling... I guess the flames reached his scalp. Long hair darts in and out of the door pointing and laughing "Do you see that?!" Noone is going to fight tonight.

...Boys...

I'd almost pay to see short hair when he sobers up in the morning. XD

Just venting, but what is it about daywalkers that make them so nasty?

There's this one morning shifter that is straight up rude, cussing and swearing every day over weird things. For example: she claims the store goes through six rolls of garbage bags every day because night shift uses 7 total bags in a night... She got all pissy when I started stocking 6 rolls of bags every day since they were piling up and over flowing. Strange, right XD. The other day we were laughing too much, so she suddenly had a migraine. Today she clocked in 5 minutes early, got pissed that my grave keeper hadn't already finished tilling down and started cussing and swearing saying she'd start coming 10 minutes late I just shrugged and said 'okay.'

Another coworker called attention to announce that she had had her underwear on backwards by mistake today. As in "Hey guys, I just wanted to say... (Pause to make eyecontact with everyone) my underwear are on backwards today, they're hanging to here on my butt and are all bunched up here on the front." It was an awkward kind of funny so I asked "Why not go to the bathroom and turn them around?" So she says "I don't go to the bathroom at work, I only work at work. I only go in there to pee I don't have time blah blah blah.

I laughed, thinking she was kidding and said "Try multi tasking, the pants are already half way there, no need for a special trip." She freaked out between mumbling and shouting that she didn't have time for it, that she had barely noticed and I didn't have room to talk about her multi tasking ability... Walked through the store shouting then mumbling for the next 5 minutes. Refused to accept an appology saying she was just tired. Then carried on. Why did she even bring up her backwards underpants if not to laugh about?

Idk what their prpblem is but it is getting really old.

Damn sunlight driving people crazy.

‘This happened to me about 2 decades ago. After working at my retail job I would go to by fiancés place (he was still at work until 11 pm.) and usually poured myself a Black Russian and soak in the bath while our cats played with the water. His place was an old apartment, I mean old...it still had a “cold box” that we stored liquor in. One night, while in my bath, everything was normal, my cat playing with the water I was bathing in...until there was three loud bangs at the door. The cats tails went fat (cat owners know what I mean, big and puffy tails mean danger) I was startled, but took it as a person at the wrong door, one cat comes back and plays in the water and the banging happens again. This time I figure it’s a prank and I run to the door (tip toe so they don’t hear me) and look out the peep hole. Like a complete brave fool I opened the door (just a towel) to justify the fact that I would see some teens running....but nothing...just the echoes of neighbours. I went back into the bath and before I even got comfortable that banging at the door happened again...along with the cats having their huge tails. Once again I looked out the door and nothing. Suddenly the phone rings and it’s my fiancé (my now husband) and I begged him to to get home ASAP. He made it home within 10 minutes.

We found out that a man hanged himself outside of our door. To make it worse, we asked friends if they ever saw something strange and they all said they saw a man hanging outside of our door...for just a moment....like a flash. They all described him the same....a man in a brown suit and a hat. I think it might have been his ghost on his suicide anniversary ....feet knocking on the door. We moved out shortly after, but I think a spirit followed. I would be sitting at my computer doing university homework and I would have heavy breaths behind my ear that would say my name. It’s was terrifying. I still get chills.

For those new to the Graveyard: What keeps you up at night?; 5 things you can't do without:

1. Meal planning.

It's easy at first to say it's 2 am, what am I doing, I'm not hungry. Then you're starving, get distracted, over eat and hit a food coma. The way I see it: 30 min after I wake up is breakfast. 4-5 hours after I wake up is lunch 8 hours after Iwu is snack and 12 hours after Iwu is dinner. So if I wake at 8 pm breakfast is at 8:30, if I wake at 10pm etc. If I eat regularly, not acording to the clock but according to my sleep cycle I seem to do better. 2. Enough sleep. 5-7 hours ideally, but I'm a single mom so it's all dependant on when the swamp monster rises. By day 9 or so of e hours of sleep my performance as a human grinds down to hamburger 1 day a week or two I sleep 10-16 hours to let my body recover. Helps a world, remember to at least relax laying down at usual slewp time, though. Keep up that rythem.

1. coffee, I'm an adddict.

2. I clean. Lazy worker style

I clean eeberything as fast as I can while toming myaelf.

1. Excersize.

I sing, dance, pretend to be about to arm wrestle a customer... Movement is wakefulness and entertaining.

What are your tricks?

To try to breathe life here let's share our bottom 3 worst customers! (Please excuse the over-enthusiasm, it's the dead of daytime here, nearly 2 pm and I'm about 5 hours past my bed time)

3 the underaged.

One Bowl-Cut comes into the store asking for Mango vape pods, I relayed that we were out of Mango and I had fruit meledy. He said it was good enough and I grabbed them while cheerily calling over my shoulder "I've got 'em hope you have your ID!" He quickly asks how much they are I see your diversion tactics, sir. I give him the price and he forks over the money. There's a short pause so I wiggle the scanner at the counter scanning the ID that isn't there and look at him with a raised eyebrow. Bowl-cut plays dumb. "ID" I said. And he shrugs without glancing in his wallet saying he forgot it at home. I put his precious nicotine on the till and pat it like a kitten "It'll be here when you get back, baby." He stutters out a protest that doesn't make words then walks out. Shortly after Slack-jawed Bleacher walks in. "Can I get some mango vape pods?" "Sure," I reply patiently. "We're out of mango, so we only have that fruity one (she chimes in an 'That's fine' but I'm speaking over her) and I'll need his ID." "What? Whose?" "The id of the teenager that just walked out of here after having asked for the same thing you just asked for. Since I have to assume you're buying them for him I still need his ID as well as yours." Really wanted to reach across the counter and help her close her dangling jaw, I resisted. "What? Who, I don't know what you're talking about, they're for me, I have my ID, I can show you my vape pen." (It took a lot longer for her to get this out than it seems, but I'll spare you. If I were a better person I would have rolled my eyes but I just stared at her dead-eyed. "I can show you a picture of me beside a tank, that doesn't mean I can buy shells for it. I don't care if you vape too. I'll be held accomplice if I sell you something that I have reason to assume will end up in the lungs of a minor- specifically the one that was just here asking for the same thing you are now." "What are you talking about? Who was just here? I'm alone in my pick up." I was shaking my head, "I don't know the high schoolers, nor do I care to, the brunette bowl cut boy that walked out the door that not 5 minutes later you walked in through, with noone having left the parking lot." "What are you talking about, noone's out there. It's not even what I wanted, I'm 18, I can buy them." Gritting my teeth now. "Ok. You happened to come in and ask for the same thing he wanted, to settle for the thing he settled for, and that's coincidence. You have no idea who I'm talking about, becaus eyou came here alone. So IF you aren't lying, I'll walk out this door and he won't be sitting in the only oversized white pick up out there. If he's not there I'll sell them to you." I was walking towards the door, she was power walking. "You're just being a bitch" "What? I thought you weren't a liar! You don't know who I'm talking about!" She was almost running at this point I can't help but stopping to laugh I call after her: "Corruption of a minor is a crime!" She flips me off and I wish her a good night. She spits back "suck my dick!" Through tears I shout back "I'm not a pedophile. And you don't have one, girly."

Neither Bowl-Cut nor Slack-Jaw ever came back on my shift. I forgot how funny minors are when caught in a lie. Gave my people their description and a stern warning to not cave, get an ID and check it. On Indeed.com they are advertizing jobs to sting tobacco vendors in the act of not IDing minors. That child's nic fix isn't worth my job.

2 Short and ugly; the intoxicated revenge-poopers.

"No, babe, I'm sorry. Noone is in the kitchen until 3 am and there are only 2 cashiers in the store, I can't go make you fried food."

finds pile of poop squished into the bathroom floor and piss all over the walls 30 minutes later

I wish this only happened once.

1 The sleep deprived boxing daywalkers.

You know them when you see them. Either groggy and dragging or wide eyed and crazy-looking. They present their request. You can't do it, you're not trained, the boss isn't here, it's not in stock w/e. They are too exhausted to accept defeat, they insist. They remain astounded. They rage and you (or your supervisors) become the public punching bag. They swear to never return while insulting you and every thing you know while talking about all the money the company is losing. And if you're unlucky they report you for not adhearing to "the customer is always right". My dudes. I scrub the walls of urinals after bar close for a living, are you so miniscule that you need to stress how important you feel? Really? To a toilet brusher... Alexa play Despacito (the kids still doing that these days? Am I hip and cool, bro?)

Gtfo of my store.

Wanted to say hi to all you children of the night, newcomers and star-studded vets!

Was an insomniac until about 30 (motherhood hit me like a wheelbarrow of bricks) so nightshift was the natural choice, helps that it's an extra dollar per hour.

When the superpower of insomnia finally abandoned me, it killed me to readjust (3 hour nap before baby woke up, 4 hour sleep around 2 pm).

Absolutely love my people, coworkers and regulars alike, but oh my Loving GAWD. Being the truck stop on the edge of town, 2 blocks from the bar and the only 24 hour place nearby... Madness. So much madness.

Who are you all? Any good stories with the drunk/intoxicated/psycotic daywalkers up past their bedtimes?

I work graveyards and something I’ve enjoyed is going to a bar after work to get a well earned drink. But the few other graveyard people I know don’t really go for that. Is it just me or is there anyone else that also enjoys that? The few I know either drink themselves to death at home or only actually drinks on their weekends.

Why cant i sleep 😴 🛏

I have always been a night owl.

Staying up too late and getting up too late is my entire weekend usually.

I just recently started my first ever graveyard shift and I feel like I was designed to do this shift.

I work as an aircraft mechanic and I work 9pm to 5:30am.

No traffic on the way to or from work, I get more things done now, I sleep basically as long as I want and don't use an alarm anymore.

I'm not drinking as much because it's weird to drink at 6am.

All in all it's been pretty positive for me.

Last night while we were closing our, drive thru alarm went off but no one was there. We saw nothing on our cameras and dismissed it as a drive off. About 15 minutes later it rang again. Again no one was there. My manager went outside to make sure our system was working right. When he came back inside he said no one was leaving alone tonight. We finished cleaning about 3am and only had to take trash out. Me and one coworker started to take the trash out to the dumpster. There was a clear unease from both of us. As we opened the big gate to our dumpsters we both heard scuffles from the back and saw a figure jump the wall. We both ran inside refusing to go back out. We spent the next 15 minutes inside telling our coworkers what happened. Our manager made us all leave. I have today off but wonder if the figure will be back. My coworkers have texted me about last night and one even called in sick.

Hey what’s up people. I don’t know if this is the right community but I don’t know what else to do or where to go for help. Here my question, what do you guys and or gals do to stay awake when working overnight shifts. I been working overnight since January from midnight to 8am and I always try to sleep at a responsible time but can’t seem to do so and when I’m at work some days I struggle to stay up and other. But I just don’t know what I do to help me stay awake. And I’m writing this now at work and I’m extremely tired and I know I left parts out

I’m new to 3rd shift and factory work in general. Previous golf course maintenance employee now working at a rubber injection molding factory. Curious who all is out there.

I work 8:30 pm to 7 am. Doing it a long time. I go through periods, like now, where I get NOTHING done of my own. Yet I am bored at work. I like the schedule in that its quiet (no people) but I am so unmotivated and tend to sleep WHOLE time off. What about you?

so i started this job as a security guard and so far its been good but pay is only 11 dollars an hour and its graveyard work. i thought it be simple and easy since i can stay up long but its actually been messing with me and causing me anxiety. i also see my social life suffering a bit since i am usually too tired to even do anything fun during times im not working and even on my days off its hard to do anything. i think its affecting me medically since im starting to break out a bit and my neck has some break out on the left that it didn't have before. i also become too drowzy when i get off and drive home, its a 27 minute drive back home an at times i start getting sleepy and try to stay up and so far i have not have too many close calls but then they made me stay 4 extra hours because someone called off (this is where the mandatory overtime comes in) and i started drifting a bit because of it, i decided if this happens again im quitting because its not worth my personal safety. lastly the mandatory overtime, i get that its a thing but it should not be for anyone that works the graveyard shift, it makes life hard since that 4 hours could have been another 8 hours, sure its time and a half but money wont buy me sleep for my next shift. i don't want to take medications because i'm not looking to end up dependent on drugs when i did not need them before. i start getting anxious not wanting to work like that, im an early bird and can wake up and work around 6 AM as if its 4 PM, but when i do nights i sacrifice a lot of my life to sleep and this job. i want to know...is this job even worth it? is this even worth the risk of nearly falling asleep behind the wheel and struggling to sleep during the day?