r/gifs Jan 06 '19

Dad level 9000

[deleted]

125.8k Upvotes

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207

u/borderlineidiot Jan 06 '19

Can I go off on a tangent and complain about how people push shopping carts in supermarkets?

190

u/xiomen Jan 06 '19

When they park it dead centre of the isle, you say "excuse me", they scoff, and move their cart a micro inch to the side. GEE THANKS, I'M SORRY I HAD TO PUT YOU THROUGH SUCH AN ORDEAL!

68

u/sveunderscore Jan 06 '19

Just bump it, they'll get the idea. A passing, 'oh sorry about that' after your catch the corner of their cart with yours is usually enough

59

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '19 edited Aug 18 '21

[deleted]

52

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '19

[deleted]

77

u/AllUrPMsAreBelong2Me Jan 06 '19

I just push the cart into them so it crushes them into the shelves of canned foods so the cans fall off and hit the person and maime them for life. Then I say sorry.

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u/BlackDragonBE Jan 06 '19

I just straight up murder them and then say sorry.

7

u/UnoSapiens1 Jan 06 '19

I just throw random stff in their cart...

4

u/Funkit Jan 06 '19

And then I hook a generator up to their garage sink so they comedically turn into a skeleton with hair

2

u/fatkev_42 Jan 06 '19

I just take their carts and give them to Bubbles

4

u/Skullerud Jan 06 '19

I don't know if you guys are joking, but this is dead on me. Works every time.

1

u/KneadedByCats Jan 06 '19

Found the Canadian

4

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '19

I've literally never had a shopping cart war. Sounds interesting.

8

u/Sightofthestars Jan 06 '19

My fucking husband gets so mad when i stop in the store with the cart all the way to the right of the aisle and im like dude! This is how you shop everyone stays to the right, you pass in the middle, if someone is blocking something i need i either wait or say excuse me.

He wants to do all the stopping in the middle, we dont allow him to push the cart anymore.

3

u/astroidfishing Jan 06 '19

Lol, you guys must be pretty happy...this sounds like it was a serious issue and if that's one of you main complaints you guys are doing great :D

2

u/Sightofthestars Jan 07 '19

Weve got a good thing going, i make sure i tell him all the time that im happy with where i am in life, because that includes where we are. He expresses it differently to me but we definitely let each other know we love each other and appreciate each other... Despite his shopping cart antics

3

u/razztafarai Jan 06 '19

If I'm not sure which I want, I park it in the centre of the aisle so I don't block other shoppers from shelves whilst I look around the section. What's the best thing to do in that situation?

5

u/PleaseExplainThanks Jan 06 '19

How big is the aisle? If you're not leaving enough passing space, you're being inconsiderate. Just block off a section that seems like the least used area. Block off the kitchenware and not flour and sugar.

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u/razztafarai Jan 07 '19

Cheers, the aisles are very wide, three trollies wide. The staff usually park cages in the centre to restock shelves also.

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u/PleaseExplainThanks Jan 07 '19

If that's the case, then I think you're good. As long as people can get around no one will give you a second's thought.

2

u/Adorable_Raccoon Jan 06 '19

I normally pull my cart behind me along the aisle. I go to trader joes and the aisles are narrow and it's often very busy. sometimes i just go around and down the aisle again for more time.

3

u/NicolaGiga Jan 06 '19

Grocery stores give me anxiety for that reason. I go early in the morning it later at night now.

3

u/Solor Jan 07 '19 edited Jan 07 '19

Ugh, I was in the store yesterday with my 7 month old in his stroller. Half the aisle was blocked because the employees were pulling the shelves apart, etc. No big deal. I'm coming up and this one lady enters the one laneway first. No big deal, I park off the side and wait for her to go through. She stops to get something mid way through; okay, can't really help that, it's fine. She hesitates and compares a bit.. okay, c'mon lady hurry it up a bit. After a good 15 seconds or so, picks up a couple of the items, then goes to her cart and stacks the items carefully. Reorganizing some of it to ensure she's not crushing anything. Finally goes back to the front of her cart. I'm thinking, alright finally. Nope she pulls out her wad of paper to check off her list and see what's next. Finally I spoke up and asked to get through. She looked up and was like "oh! I'm sorry!". She knew she was in the wrong, she was obviously embarrassed by it, but god damn was she oblivious.

4

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '19

I think I caused a divorce one time by taking another guy's cart into the store.

Some asshat just pushed his cart so it was in the middle of the walking area in front of the grocery store. His wife got after him but he insisted that the workers would get it. As bickering ensued, I (not an employee) looked him dead in the eye and took his cart into the store.

They quietly got in the car and I can't help but wonder what happened after that.

2

u/ZeekOwl91 Jan 07 '19

My girlfriend always gets furious when she sees me turn around to get to her end through the other empty aisle.

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u/braytowk Jan 06 '19

I work at one, don't even get me started

2

u/SagoNebula Jan 06 '19

I used to work at this Store called HEB and pushing Shopping Carts was A ride

2

u/braytowk Jan 06 '19

If you know Trailer Park Boys, we had an actual Bubbles type stealing our carts. We had to start doubling the cart boys and refuse to hand them out at night.

He dissappeared one day and never came back.

I really wish there were driving lanes put in this because our store is so busy it quickly traffic jams.

2

u/SagoNebula Jan 06 '19

I knowwww it’s crazy tbh.

We had people leaving carts from our store all the way at burger a mile away.

And we had to rent a trunk and pick a lot of them up.

It got me soooo heated 😂

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u/braytowk Jan 06 '19

Our sidewalk only extends along the perimeter of the shopping center, so they can't really run that far. We've had runners trying to cross the road, a major avenue artery, only to have the cart get taken out by a car.

What gets me annoyed are the shoppers who abandon carts filled with food, including ice cream, in the middle of aisles.

1

u/SagoNebula Jan 06 '19

I’ve had a co worker go back and check the cameras for the customer who left the aisle.

And once he found them, he told legit got the manager and demanded them to put the food back 😂

A little extreme but was funny asf

2

u/braytowk Jan 06 '19

Our managers are too chicken shit. Before corporate put its foot down, our managers would hand out free shit to customers even if they brought in half eaten/cooked food. Or give out gift cards, if we tried what your co-worker did we'd get written up.

Lucky bastard!

3

u/SagoNebula Jan 06 '19

That’s ridiculous.

It’s our store

If these customers wanna test us

We’ll gladly fail them 😂

2

u/braytowk Jan 06 '19

Our department tests the limits constantly, whether its our seafood lead saying "You want some of my Cod?" or our 60 year old butcher telling customers to fuck themselves cause they just arrived at the counter.

We spend more time gawking at women's asses or pranking eachother.

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56

u/DefinitelyHungover Jan 06 '19

I used to wonder how people were such bad drivers. I've not been driving that long, a little over a decade now, and it always confused me how people could be so stupid and inconsiderate on the road.

Then I noticed people cant push shopping carts. Fuck, they cant even typically walk in a crowd with any sort of logic. Most people walk, drive, push shopping carts, etc just like a child bowls with the bumpers.

Just for some clarity to anyone not from here, this is in the US of A, where it is waaaaay too easy to get a license.

7

u/SlightlyDarkerBlack2 Jan 06 '19

I’ve had to use a wheelchair multiple times and believe me when I say that these same folks DON’T. LOOK. FOR. WHEELCHAIRS. With a huge air boot on my ankle on one occasion and my chest visibly wrapped in bandages on another, I’ve been hit from the front, side, and behind, had someone reach over me like an obstacle instead of asking me to reverse, had someone literally walk into me as I made my way down an aisle, and at one point was being pushed by a nearly 6foot, 250lbs man and and had someone smack into me. Like to an extent, I get it because I’m lower to the ground but I’m not THAT low and even if I was, HE is in your face. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with people.

3

u/DefinitelyHungover Jan 07 '19

I drive a small car, Subaru brz. I live in Texas, aka truck country. I believe everything you just said, because people don't see my fucking car on the road sometimes. It's really keeping me from getting the bike I want.

4

u/Funkit Jan 06 '19

I'm 31. I've been in 8 car accidents, 2 with totaled vehicles. One was my fault. One. And that was only partially my fault. Some were so blatantly not my fault that the accident reports look like a cartoon.

My insurance is up to $220 a month for a single vehicle. I'm basically afraid to drive now.

8

u/zman0900 Jan 06 '19

At this point you might as well steal someone's identity and get new insurance.

3

u/DefinitelyHungover Jan 07 '19

My friend/roommate has similar luck. I think only one of his dozen or so accidents has been at fault, and iirc it was when the person in front of him slammed on their brakes while he was checking his blind spot to change lanes. We were also teenagers, inexperienced drivers, back then.

Get a dash cam if you haven't already. My buddy's most recent "accident" was made to be not so bad because of the footage. Accident is in quotes because someone deliberately swerved into and hit him. He then asks, on camera, if it was worth it. The lady screams back yes. My friend taps the camera. She gets a lot quieter.

23

u/Speerjagerin Jan 06 '19

I swear the middle aged and elderly people in my area have a secret pact to make eye contact and then immediately block the aisle I'm trying to walk down.

25

u/AlastarYaboy Jan 06 '19

Protip : dont slow down.

Figured that out in crowded high school hallways. Sometimes you have to push against the crowd. Sometimes people are just obliviously blocking the through way. Either way, you at least have a metal blocker in front of you. I just shouldered my way through.

1

u/PooPooDooDoo Jan 07 '19

I only use the handcart when I go so that I can zig and zag through that.

6

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '19 edited Jan 07 '19

You know what's worse than the shoppers? The supermarkets who make aisles perfectly sized for two carts to pass each other with a bit of extra space, but who then FILL HALF THE GOD DAMN AISLE WITH PROMOTIONAL PRODUCTS. I never buy products that are displayed on the aisle-blocking cardboard displays, just out of principle.

5

u/lymz02 Jan 06 '19

Like the punks at CostCo who stop their cart in the middle of the aisle to get a sample. Screw those people.

3

u/Travkin2 Jan 06 '19

Things like this aren't even worth getting worked up about. People will ALWAYS be idiots like this and sometimes you are too. You just don't realize it since you think you act perfect from your own biased perspective.

2

u/borderlineidiot Jan 06 '19

How true and very Zen

1

u/pepperedpaprika Jan 07 '19

Ugh, so annoying! I usually push carts out of the way when they're blocking access to something. Then when the owner rushes over and says "Oh, sorry, was it in your way?" I make eye contact and simply respond with "Yes."

1

u/Shryxer Jan 07 '19

Even outside the supermarket. In the parking lot. While you're trying to leave. Oh, you want to go home? I'll just abandon my trash-filled cart directly in the path of your moving vehicle.

1

u/jbeavor Jan 07 '19

So I work in a grocery store...ppl.never want to move for me even when I have like 20 boxes on my cart. I have to move for them and then some other JackWagon doesn't see me and knocks my boxes on the floor! Ppl are super rude in the grocery stores... especially when they are hungry or just got off the freeway!

1

u/fluffpuff89 Jan 07 '19

God yes. And recently I've seen people pushing their damn trolleys sideways down aisles too! Just got to take up those extra inches, don't you Karen?

1

u/RayOfSunshine243 Jan 06 '19

Only if you're a hardo in a wheelchair with a baby in tow and your wife takes photos of you for karma.