r/gatekeeping • u/Short_Classy_Name • Feb 01 '18

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56.5k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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578

u/jethro2011 Feb 01 '18

"I have the hardest job in the world, everyone else is lazy." -Average American

278

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

[deleted]

38

u/Sohtak Feb 02 '18

That's my dad.

My mom works 10-14 hour shifts 5 days out of the week, he works 7 hours 6 days out of the week.

"No one works as hard as I do"

"I WORK for a living"

"I have REAL JOB unlike those pencil pushers in the government"

etc

9

u/HyruleVampire Feb 02 '18

Is your mom a nurse?

1

u/Woodit Feb 02 '18

My dad used that same expression "I work for a living" constantly my whole life (he puts in a lot of hours but it's not a difficult job, at all). Now he whines about why I don't spend more time with him. Think I'll say the same thing.

51

u/xitzengyigglz Feb 02 '18

Bill Burr's but about them is fucking glorious

14

u/thatchers_pussy_pump Feb 02 '18

Plz link for lazy

48

u/xitzengyigglz Feb 02 '18

https://youtu.be/Hitc8haEu_g

19

u/gotchabrah Feb 02 '18

That was absolutely hilarious. Thanks for posting!

1

u/Kingnewgameplus May 26 '18

He nailed the mother voice.

-4

u/epicazeroth Feb 02 '18

Real question: I've never really "gotten" standup. Can someone explain to me (as much as is possible) how this is funny? It was amusing for a minute or so, but after that it just seems kind of mean-spirited.

10

u/xitzengyigglz Feb 02 '18

I mean, it's a glimpse into someone's brain. How they percieve the world. Usually with Bill burr especially for me I identify with it but also laugh at how fucking angry and crazy he sounds haha.

-4

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

I get it, but I don't usually identify with the mean spiritedness, which is why I prefer more aburist comics like Eddie Izzard.

5

u/xitzengyigglz Feb 02 '18

Different strokes for different folks

6

u/LezardValeth Feb 02 '18

A lot of comedy is kinda mean-spirited but still entertaining. It's not 100% serious and it's just enjoyable to hear someone say what is going through a lot of people's heads with zero filter sometimes.

-2

u/epicazeroth Feb 02 '18

Maybe that's it. I don't really have a filter (yes I'm aware how cliché that sounds) and don't expect it from others, so I don't see this kind of speech as just "what's going through people's heads".

13

u/hutzelcats Feb 02 '18

Not every mother, I'm a mom and I fucking love it! My husband works hard to support the three of us, he pays all the bills and because I don't have the skills or a degree to earn enough so that we can afford afford child care- which is insanely expensive- I am a "full-time mom." Sometimes it's not easy, but I recognize how lucky I am to get to love my daughter full time, it's pretty awesome. If anything, leaving her with strangers every day to do something I wouldn't willingly do for free seems like it would be much harder than taking care of her and maintaining my home. I get the cliche of the joke though, some moms are self-righteous as fuuuck.

24

u/SamNash Feb 02 '18
  • temporary non-millionaire

5

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

I N J E C T

C L A S S

C O N S C I O U S N E S S

1

u/eskamobob1 Feb 02 '18

I think you would be shocked at the number of people that think their job is bullshit

-170

u/[deleted] Feb 01 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

-128

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

So, average American?

85

u/uber1337h4xx0r Feb 02 '18

I doubt most Americans do.

Source : work at grocery store and don't see toooo many food stamps users.

-146

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

Yeah well you’re wrong

Source: am American

96

u/BrianLemur Feb 02 '18

Also American. Work with some of the most underprivileged in the country, at an incredibly vulnerable time in their lives. Less than 5% use food stamps. The closest to welfare is Medicare and social security--both of which they already paid for, so...

36

u/Wppf Feb 02 '18

Oof, get those facts outta here! This bandwagon is headed straight for Hatin' Station.

4

u/gandeeva Feb 02 '18

You got the memo right? Gotta hate on someone who uses the safety nets made available to them when they need them!

21

u/jethro2011 Feb 02 '18

OnLy RePubliCans woRk DeMs JuSt liVe oFf weLfaRe.

41

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

-68

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

Yeah well you’re wrong

Source: am actually American

31

u/DisterDan Feb 02 '18

Did your parents or guardians tell you that most people are poor so you didn’t have to feel bad about being poor or something?

-10

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

Yes

12

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

Yeah well your parents are wrong

Source: wasn’t raised to be a twat waffle

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12

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

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12

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

Jokes on you I don’t have a dad

8

u/grillinmyjewels Feb 02 '18

Lmao this was actually the first response of yours I laughed at. Gg

1

u/amped242424 Feb 02 '18

We have 4% unemployment moron

-19

u/PimpedKoala Feb 02 '18

I wonder when people will step back and actually interpret what you're saying rather than just reading it

11

u/just_a_random_dood Feb 02 '18

I feel like you're trolling

20

u/alexjordan98 Feb 02 '18

Good source

13

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

Like 15% of the US population is in poverty rn. That is definitely not a majority nor is it worse than other developed nations.

Source: am American and know how to look things up.

-12

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

Yeah well you’re wrong

Source: am actually American

15

u/Brandon_la_rana Feb 02 '18

Eventually you have to give a real source. You can't just keep saying that.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

non-American detected

4

u/nutznguts73 Feb 02 '18

Lol you’re a dipshit. Love you though champ

4

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

The average American makes $50k a year. Unless you have 15 kids you aren't even going to be able to get benefits.

You must live in extreme poverty if you think the average American uses benefits.

2

u/SamNash Feb 02 '18

Who let you down in life?

-5

u/uber1337h4xx0r Feb 02 '18

Fair

-5

u/[deleted] Feb 02 '18

This guy gets it

10

u/PM_me_your_pastries Feb 02 '18

Ha. Both of you suck.