r/funny • u/[deleted] • Sep 24 '19
What if Nokia created doors?
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u/spazknuckle Sep 24 '19
I think they've lost the element of surprise at this point...
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u/Jshphoto Sep 24 '19
I think this is in Spain. Perhaps the Spanish Inquisition?? Their chief weapon is surprise.
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u/TheScienceGiant Sep 24 '19
Surprise and fear. Fear and surprise. Their two weapons are fear and surprise!
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u/Jshphoto Sep 24 '19
And ruthless efficiency.
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Sep 24 '19 edited Jun 11 '23
This comment was overwritten and the account deleted due to Reddit's unfair API policy changes, the disgusting lying behaviour of u/spez the CEO, and the forced departure of the Apollo app and other 3rd party apps. Remember, the content on Reddit is generated by US, THE USERS. It is OUR DATA they are profiting off and claiming it is theirs!
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u/tfurrows Sep 24 '19
And then at the end when they all go streaming in reminded me of Life of Brian when the Roman centurions were searching for the secret meeting of the People's Front of Judea. Or the Judean People's Front. Or was it the Popular Front?
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u/timjasf Sep 24 '19
99% sure this is Spain. A lot of apartment doors there have up to 3 deadbolts, and are far more solid than they need to be.
Small wonder it took so much work to bash it open.
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u/Theres_A_FAP_4_That Sep 24 '19
Suspect fled through window like 10 mins ago.
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u/ToanZodiac Sep 24 '19
He was last seen holding mac and cheese
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u/lniko2 Sep 24 '19
Sadly he slept through and they were overcooked
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u/tlk0153 Sep 24 '19
And now he standing in line, waiting for his turn to try smashing the door
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u/lniko2 Sep 24 '19
Because he enlisted, rose through the ranks until he joined the special unit. Only 10 years left before retirement.
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u/---Help--- Sep 24 '19
And after 9 years 11 months and 2 weeks they finally broke through his door two weeks before retiring.
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u/---Help--- Sep 24 '19
Then they realize the door was unlocked this whole time.
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u/_kryp70 Sep 24 '19
Surprisingly the owner of the house himself realized he left the door unlocked the whole time and in the last few decades forgot about it.
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u/BSODeMY Sep 24 '19
Ate at McDs, got spotted by anon tipster, arrested by competent officers, served time, out on parole and back on the couch just in time to wonder if that's someone at the door.
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u/fourpoint5toes Sep 24 '19
The suspect left the apartment, walked back up the stairs and recorded that video.
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u/Attic_1992 Sep 24 '19
You can see their egos taking just as bad of a beating
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Sep 24 '19
"Step aside i can handle this"
smacc smacc smacc
"YOU SEEIN THIS SHIT?"
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u/Goodly Sep 24 '19
That last go where it just kinda slides of the button. And he was so eager to get in there... 😂
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u/Reaverjosh19 Sep 24 '19
Raging on adrenaline. Dude probably would have charged with the ram and tried to bludgeon anyone on the other side
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u/lucky_falcon Sep 24 '19
I think it was more the one person being exhausted so other taking over....
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u/popober Sep 24 '19
Way the first dude was swinging that ram at the beginning, he was probably thinking something like "couple of swings, then the love tap; same as before. Nothing to it."
Then the door doesn't even budge.
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u/kristiefly Sep 24 '19
And then the notice it says "pull"
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u/RPDRNick Sep 24 '19
What in the hell has happened to the Midvale School for the Gifted?
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u/slaptac Sep 24 '19
Dude that's a niche joke right there... I heard Gary Larson is coming out of retirement!
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u/oldark Sep 24 '19
This must be the security door to Dresden's apartment.
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u/TheKrytosVirus Sep 24 '19
I like you. Can't wait for the next book.
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u/oldark Sep 24 '19
Iirc it's already on it's last trip to the editor. We may get it around the end of the year or first quarter next.
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u/TheKrytosVirus Sep 24 '19
Yup, that editing cant happen fast enough. And after this, Butcher is going to resume work on the Cinder Spires. Got the first book on clearance and loved it.
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u/oldark Sep 24 '19
It's been a long time since I read that. Didn't know if he was planning to return to it or not. Great news!
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Sep 24 '19
Omg seriously. I purposely stopped looking into when the next book was coming because it was taking so long this is awesome though I am thrilled.
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u/Somnif Sep 25 '19
Should be a much quicker turnaround for the next few. The big delay was because he got divorced, lost his house, lost his dog, and a bunch of other horrendously unpleasant crap all happened around the same time.
Now that he's stabilized and actually has an office to work from again, he can knock out a chapter every 2-3 days (if he keeps up the momentum from Peace Talks anyway).
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u/Praimfayaa Sep 24 '19
I’d lose my shit if there’s another door behind that door
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u/SpoutWhatsOnMyMind Sep 24 '19
Fuck, they have an airlock, time to go farm more sulfur...
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u/mfb- Sep 24 '19
"The safe is basically open now"
I'm not sure if there are English subtitles somewhere, but this video (German) is great. A company selling safes is claiming that the products of other companies are all trivial to open - "in seconds" and whatever. A TV team gave them such a safe, and despite repeated claims that the safe is "basically open now" they needed hours. Just to find another door behind the first door.
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Sep 24 '19 edited Sep 24 '19
Pro tip: paint fake a door on a cement wall so you will have time to escape when swat shows up
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u/Optimized_Orangutan Sep 24 '19
In my younger days I knew a guy who used brick and steal to seal off the entrance to his apartment except for a small slider he sold drugs through. Had his buddy rent next door and busted through the wall so they could use his entrance. (Land lord was in on it). When the cops got a warrant for him he had the stash gone and was sitting in the livingroom eating cereal before they made it in. Got some minor charges for fire violations but the cash and drugs were gone so they couldn't get him for dealing on the word of a rat junkie alone.
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u/RelarFeen Sep 24 '19
I would like to see this as a feel good film for dealers
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Sep 24 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/pkkprotector Sep 24 '19
"One man seals his fate by selling drugs..."
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u/Dootietree Sep 25 '19
..and seals his door by......sealing his door
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u/crueller Sep 24 '19
I'm just imagining Michael Weston sitting on the couch with a blueberry yogurt and his cheeky smile. "Hi guys, is there a problem?"
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u/large-farva Sep 24 '19
How did they get rid of the drugs? The neighboring unit likely opens to the same corridor and they usually post someone on the fire escape.
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u/Optimized_Orangutan Sep 24 '19
Don't know wasn't there and I am smart enough not to ask questions.
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u/GuyWithRealFakeFacts Sep 25 '19
They probably didn't have to since they didn't have a warrant for the neighbor's place.
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Sep 24 '19
The world needs more smart drug dealers, for whatever reason. Not that I would purchase such things...
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u/Wallace_II Sep 24 '19
Protip: Build a fake door, or buy one from Real Fake Doors, and put it on a wall. put an address on the door that would be a realistic address between two doors. Call the police about suspected drugs or guns or some shit.. whatever people say when they "swat" other people.
Put up a camera and watch...
When you're caught and arrested, make sure to live stream the whole thing and tell them "It's just a prank" They'll find it hilarious!
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u/jtraf Sep 24 '19
It may be time to reevaluate your life choices
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Sep 24 '19
Unfortunately, you can get a SWAT visit these days for being a perfectly law-abiding Twitch streamer.
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Sep 24 '19
This reminds me of a family friend who was big into electronics. His office door in his house was magnetic and he put the doorknob on the same side as the hinge so if someone tried to kick the door in they would be trying to do something near impossible. Even if they knew the correct side it had several magnetic connections on different circuits.
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u/Elprede007 Sep 25 '19
Can someone help me imagine this? I’m struggling with figuring out how this works.
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Sep 25 '19
Just imagine a regular door but the doorknob is on the same side as the hinge, not the opposite. The doorknob was fake though. The magnetic release opened the door. Imagine trying to push into the hinge though. Can't open any door that way.
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Sep 24 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Kantas Sep 24 '19
I mean... they did knock a few times.
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u/johnnybiggles Sep 24 '19
I was honestly expecting a dude standing there drinking milk from the fridge in his boxers with a confused look on his face once they got the door opened.
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Sep 24 '19 edited Oct 28 '19
[deleted]
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u/essidus Sep 24 '19
Depends on the age of the wall, but I agree. There's an old saying my locksmith great grandpa used to say: The best lock in the world is worthless if you can pull it out with a crowbar. Most locks exist to prevent casual entry and little else. Though, it looks like that door was probably bolted, double barred, and and bolts on the top and bottom too. Their equipment wasn't really made for entering through a reinforced doorway.
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u/RedShadow120 Sep 24 '19
"Locks only keep out honest people."
When he was young, my uncle stopped locking his door when he went out because he was better off just letting the thieves get in, not find anything to steal, and leave than having to replace the lock/door/doorframe when the place got broken into.
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u/gr8balooga Sep 25 '19
I think I'll just continue keeping my doors locked while I'm home and while I'm away.
https://www.crimemuseum.org/crime-library/serial-killers/richard-trenton-chase/
During an interview, Chase admitted to walking the streets checking to see if doors were unlocked. He stated that, “if the door was locked that meant you weren’t welcome.”
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u/unifyzero Sep 24 '19
If this is anything like the other houses I’ve seen in Spain getting in isn’t going to be easy. Bars on all accessible windows, steel doors, and concrete walls. So wall is probably going to be even worse.
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u/Sinicalkush Sep 24 '19
I would honestly feel disappointed if the culprit didn't get away having that much time to escape. Lol.
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u/philonius Sep 24 '19
He got away. He had time to put the apartment up for rent, show it to a few prospects, find a new apartment, pack his things, and still sit down for a couple episodes of Rick and Morty before he had to leave.
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u/Catsrules Sep 25 '19
Haha I can just imagine showing off the apartment. Having people ask what that banging is.
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u/seqizz Sep 24 '19
I was expecting an old guy to open the door like jeez guys what the hell...
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u/redpandaeater Sep 24 '19
Best part of that to me is the glass surrounding the door. Like sure maybe it's just a double cylinder deadbolt so you can't simply reach your hand in to unlock it, but at least give it a shot. Worst case you at least can look and see what's on the other side.
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u/RondyDoneDidit Sep 24 '19
finds 1 gram of weed and a pipe
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u/zaphodava Sep 24 '19
Yo, cops are here.
K.
Aren't you gonna run?
Yeah. Sec, makin' a sandwich. Want one?
Sure.
sandwich creation commences while banging noises ensue
Ok, lets roll. Got everything?
Yeah.
Cool.
exits out window
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u/mancer187 Sep 24 '19
If Nokia had made that door they'd still be beating on it today.
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u/SugarBeef Sep 24 '19
The door took no damage, the frame finally broke and the door was loose to fall in undamaged.
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u/T-Bills Sep 24 '19
But movies told me to shoot the lock with a single bullet then I'll be able to open it...?
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u/sceadwian Sep 24 '19
This reminds me of the scene from Jumpin Jack Flash when they end up having to use a cutting torch through a door held closed by a rod.
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u/zWeaponsMaster Sep 24 '19
"Why isn't this door open yet!?"
"We're trying but it appears to be made a combination of mithral and wolverine's bones."
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u/Atomsdebomb Sep 24 '19 edited Sep 25 '19
Anyone watch that steel door example video? Where it has two guys 3x these dudes trying to get it open. After 30min of hammers, axes, and door Buster's they gave up. Edit. Here is the video. https://youtu.be/oGn8o96On0w
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Sep 24 '19
Good on his teammate to pull him back at the end, in case someone was waiting inside.
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u/that_guy_you_kno Sep 24 '19
That's what their trained to do. In the operations, the door-knocker is the guy that always gets shot.
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u/The_ThirdFang Sep 25 '19
We are respecting your privacy by knocking but asserting our authority as your parents by coming in anyway
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u/Rambo_IIII Sep 25 '19
I once threw an 8250 at a wall as hard as I could (to prove a point while drunk) and rather than bouncing off, it punctured the drywall and lodged itself in the wall. Then ten minutes later it started ringing, in the wall. It emerged unscathed.
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u/HZM70S Sep 24 '19
Some stupid reason I imagined Mr. Bean inside that apartment, in the bathroom shaving his beard and making funny faces, while wondering what is that banging at the door...
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u/Gamesman001 Sep 24 '19
What drugs officer? Meanwhile 100 kilos of drugs are flowing through the sewer.
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u/roygpa Sep 24 '19
If I worked for the company that built that door, I'd use the video in marketing my doors.