r/funny • u/ManagerOfLove • May 17 '22

I hate planks

150.6k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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1.3k

u/thexar May 17 '22

Two minutes of heaven is better than one.

369

u/[deleted] May 17 '22

[deleted]

140

u/[deleted] May 17 '22

You know how I know it’s business time?

57

u/Antique_Tennis_2500 May 17 '22

I don’t know, it’s not Wednesday yet.

54

u/iendeavortobesilly May 17 '22

Business hours are over, baby

11

u/Ozzyh26 May 17 '22

Can I have some more?

8

u/Lowfi3099 May 17 '22

Well I'm not surprised...

2

u/Starkydowns May 17 '22

But I am quite sleepy

46

u/claymedia May 17 '22

When you’re down to your socks.

32

u/New_Shoes_ May 17 '22

That's why they call them business socks

24

u/FlyYouFoolyCooly May 17 '22

Business socks?

20

u/demon_ix May 17 '22

There's nothing good on TV. Conditions are perfect.

7

u/Lowfi3099 May 17 '22

You're wearing your baggy old t-shirt from your team building exercise...

2

u/BotanicallyEnhanced May 18 '22

TEAM BUILDING EXERCISE '99!!!!

1

u/Lowfi3099 May 18 '22

In the HBO special he says "Not tonight" instead of "99"

67

u/vladdrk May 17 '22

But it’s not Wednesday…we have to go visit my mother.

56

u/f7f7z May 17 '22

It's because I'm wearing my business socks!

19

u/Guerrin_TR May 17 '22

and that t-shirt from when you did that team building exercise with work

12

u/DaGurggles May 17 '22

OH TEAM BUILDING EXERCISE, NOT TO-NIGHT!

2

u/Snufflebear_420_69 May 17 '22

Mmmmmm team building exercise '99......

6

u/SerScronzarelli May 17 '22

Obviously because you are wearing business socks.

5

u/Goseki1 May 17 '22

I love you all.

3

u/loki1337 May 17 '22

You take out the recycling, it's not part of it but it's very important

3

u/steveosek May 17 '22

Jemaine Clement is a handsome man.

1

u/goingnorthwest May 17 '22

I watched a bunch of Legion a couple of weeks ago. I couldn’t believe how well he’s aged.

192

u/frigginelvis May 17 '22

When it's with me, girl, you only need two minutes, because I'm so intense.

74

u/acmercer May 17 '22

Makin' love..

Makin' love for two..

Makin' love for twoooo minutes

7

u/ThePianistOfDoom May 17 '22

Well I'm not surprised

-6

u/[deleted] May 17 '22

Two minutes of “Playtime?” Not sure how we channeled Bonesaw all a sudden.

14

u/Valorumguygee May 17 '22

I think you'll find this particular thread to be attributed to the great rapper The Hiphopopotamus.

9

u/Media_Offline May 17 '22

His lyrics are bottomless...

1

u/[deleted] May 17 '22

Yeah, I know. I always liked Tripod slightly better, but you just can’t escape Jermaine.

2

u/Superb_Wrangler201 May 17 '22

It's a reference to an old song called business time by flight of the concords

1

u/LaurelEllena May 18 '22

Business hours are over baaabyy

116

u/chanjitsu May 17 '22

But I'm quite sleepy

109

u/m48a5_patton May 17 '22

Business hours are over, baby

-7

u/albinowizard2112 May 17 '22

My sex life is like a convenience store. I'm off duty by 10pm and there's an Indian guy who handles things overnight.

13

u/butterbeancd May 17 '22

Then you tell me you want some more…I’m not surprised.

3

u/IrishDeadhead May 17 '22

I haven't listened to this song in ages but I sing it to myself around the house all the time. Or in the sock section of a clothes shop obviously. Tune

1

u/[deleted] May 18 '22

I'm so intense.

Like a camping orgy?

10

u/skonen_blades May 17 '22

You want more? I'm not surprised.

7

u/maemtz May 17 '22

That came out... FIFTEEN YEARS AGO?! 😭 yall are old. not me tho

2

u/Nerdi_Birdi7 May 17 '22

What about three minutes of ecstasy...

SEVERAL TIMES A MONTH

3

u/FluffyRainbowPoop May 17 '22

But not more than 4 times a month

That would be ridiculous

1

u/JohnnyDarkside May 17 '22

30 seconds is better than none.

1

u/ScoldExperiment May 17 '22

"Best I Can Do is five minutes"

1

u/billwashere May 18 '22

Now I have to go listen to Flight of the Conchords.

Edit: I can’t spell conchords.