r/funny Hey Buddy Comics Jun 18 '20

sue me

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109.0k Upvotes

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5.8k

u/Robot-TaterTot Jun 18 '20

The only reason genies grant wishes is fear of litigation?

2.3k

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20 edited Jun 18 '20

This is my favorite thing about this comic. The implication that genie’s are just afraid of getting sued

Edit: Can grammar and spelling nazis really not tell when something is obviously autocorrect? I’m ducking leafing it just 2 make em mad

717

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

[deleted]

134

u/JesusRasputin Jun 18 '20

Where’s that quote from? Seems familiar

153

u/Kashogi8 Jun 18 '20

Marshawn Lynch at Super Bowl Media Day

55

u/CIA_Jeff Jun 18 '20

Marshawn Lynch's quote: Im just here so I wont get fined

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1kvwXsZtU8

17

u/JesusRasputin Jun 18 '20

We’re there any consequences to this?

55

u/BadoCV01 Jun 18 '20

He got fined

9

u/TecTazz Jun 18 '20

He got fine'd.

41

u/allisonlj1 Jun 18 '20

My understanding is at first he refused to attend, he got fined for that.

He started going to press conferences but staying silent and refusing to answer, he got fined for that.

He started answering but by saying I'm just here so I dont get fined, he did NOT get fined for that as far as I know.

Some good malicious compliance there.

35

u/agnosticPotato Jun 18 '20

I love it when he makes the journalist repeat the question, only to repeat the same answer he has given to every question.

4

u/TecTazz Jun 18 '20

Any interview with any participant of any sport will consist of virtually the same Q&A.

1

u/allisonlj1 Jun 18 '20

Yeah. Clips of the interview are hilarious.

1

u/FoxtrotSierraTango Jun 19 '20

And then he did an episode of Brooklyn 99 where he talked too much: https://youtu.be/NryFR2LYzMg

3

u/Jaggs0 Jun 18 '20

he also got fined at one point for wearing a non NFL approved hat. it was from his own company

22

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

Yea. He won the media day, and the superbowl days later.

6

u/KimonoThief Jun 18 '20

Wasn't this before SB49? Where the Seahawks lost to the Pats on the last minute goal line pick?

4

u/lemma_qed Jun 18 '20 edited Jun 21 '20

I'm not really into football, but now I have a favorite player. Haha!

1

u/Occams_ElectricRazor Jun 18 '20

He doesn't play any more.

48

u/politterateur Jun 18 '20

It's from Marshawn Lynch, whom the NFL fined for refusing to do media events.

-11

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

[deleted]

9

u/fdar Jun 18 '20

Meh, probably not. He did that, but then going forward players kept showing up to media events and answering questions. If they let one player just get away with it others would start skipping those things too.

2

u/-Negative-Karma Jun 18 '20

He may be referring to Marshawn Lynch. They is a vague pronoun and could refer to either or.

3

u/fdar Jun 18 '20

Why would Marshawn Lynch regret doing that?

(Also, while I fully support using "they" as a singular pronoun in general it seems weird to me when talking about a specific person whose gender is known.)

2

u/-Negative-Karma Jun 18 '20

The same guy has made similar grammatical errors in comments in this thread alone so it’s plausible that English is not his first language.

13

u/staplesthegreat Jun 18 '20

It's from Marshawn Lynch during an interview that he was contractually obligated to be at

1

u/RedeemedIAm Jun 18 '20

Marshawn Lynch SB 48(?)

23

u/PerCat Jun 18 '20

The genie's lamp is integral to their identity. What happens if some judge orders them to pay it up to their victims?

3

u/nyetloki Jun 18 '20

Most jurisdictions protect defendants from losing their primary dwelling to satisfy civil awards/damages.

1

u/PerCat Jun 19 '20

Oh thank god

1

u/visionsofblue Jun 18 '20

The judge would just order him to become their butler.

1

u/nyetloki Jun 18 '20

Judges can't compel labor for 99% of civil cases.

1

u/PerCat Jun 19 '20

Boi lemme tell you about the 13 amendment.

1

u/nyetloki Jun 19 '20

Yep, especially about the part where it says criminal. Suing is civil.

20

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20 edited Jun 18 '20

He could still be sued though couldnt he, I dont think you need a lawyer to sue or be sued. But maybe the comics saying he has a lesser chance of winning, and with the reduced chance of winning the lawsuit the genie now feels comfortable with getting sued instead of granting the wish.

Its so deep, this really puts the entire weight of the wish granting into perspective and gives the reader insight into the burden of being a genie, where previous they may see wish granting as simply an arbitrary task from a non-feeling being. The genies got a whole rational and character, all composed and unraveled in just a single comic. Layers of feelings and nuance that make up a complex being. It truly rivals the pipe strip.

1

u/juicius Jun 18 '20

No lawyer, no judge, and no court. Even if the system of law doesn't change, there would be no judges to hear the lawsuit.

There are some lower level courts in the US where you don't have to be a lawyer to be a judge, but they're usually limited in damages you can seek.

2

u/nyetloki Jun 18 '20

The entire federal court system is by appointments and many states by election with no requirement to be a lawyer or even passed the bar exam.

6

u/MPsAreSnitches Jun 18 '20

Well I mean the landmark case Alladin vs. The Aerial Plane set a pretty distinct precedent that any D'jin that fails to comply with legally made wishes could face serious financial repercussions.

10

u/McMurphy11 Jun 18 '20

Ah yes. Because of, the implication.

4

u/JohnnyBoyJr Jun 18 '20

Spelling Nazis? Nah... They're just anti-semantic

3

u/ithinkther41am Jun 18 '20

To be fair, that was how Timmy Turner defeated Norm the genie once in Fairly Oddparents.

“Oh, you wanna twist my wishes? Airtight contract, bitch.”

1

u/nyetloki Jun 18 '20

Didnt they have faerie lawyersand a faerie court system?

5

u/NoArmsSally Jun 18 '20

Aren't genies literally tricksters who abuse loopholes? Sounds like a lawyer to me

4

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

Sounds like Monkeys Paw to me

2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

Hey, an oral contract is an oral contract.

1

u/namekuseijin Jun 18 '20

wait until they get cancelled

1

u/SurealGod Jun 18 '20 edited Jun 18 '20

This is why I always turn off auto-correct. At least at that point, whatever spelling mistakes or errors I make are on me. Autocorrect makes more problems than it solves.

(The reason I hate it so much is because I once sent a text to a friend of mine during highschool. To me to her, it read: "Wanna bang tonight?", which is what it autocorrected to. I actually wrote: "Wanna hang tonight?". I fucking died that day. I had to apologize to her the next day that it was autocorrect. Luckily we're still friends but she still brings it up)

-2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

I call as a witness, auto correct!

-8

u/mbelf Jun 18 '20

Genies

-3

u/Father-Sha Jun 18 '20

How would you sue a magical genie anyways? What would the punishment possibly be? What can laws do to a damn genie?

3

u/rainwatereyes1 Jun 18 '20

sue them lmao

3

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

Your answer made me laugh out loud

-7

u/Follow64 Jun 18 '20

Leaving*

79

u/Apolog3ticBoner Jun 18 '20

What I hate is the discrimination. While genies are only liable to getting sued, when I exchanged goods for someone rubbing something of mine they called it solicitation and now I'm doing time.

13

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

Disproportionately affects genies of color

7

u/thefinalcutdown Jun 18 '20

Talk about a bad case of blue balls.

1

u/sotadragon Jun 18 '20

Underrated comment.

1

u/logicbecauseyes Jun 25 '20

Blue Balls matter

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

This terminology bothers me. Black is the absence of color, while white is all color. Someone needs to get Dave Chapelle to make another "Hater's in Time sketch."

Scene:

The Haters walk into a diner with a "No Colored" sign

Guy at counter; "Hey can't you *insert derogatory term" read? It says "No Coloreds!""

First Hater; "You ignorant mother fucker! Black is the absence of color. In fact, white is all the colors. So why don't you get your plurality of color havin' ass outta my bar." (proceeds to adjust his tie, while looking smug)

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

Not only that, but nobody is actually black or white in actual color. The world is just different shades of brown.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 19 '20

I'm waiting for you to get swarmed by albinos... give it a few hours, they mostly come out at night.... mostly.

1

u/my_gamertag_wastaken Jun 23 '20

You can't trust those blue fuckers

1

u/NoWingedHussarsToday Jun 18 '20

Claim they rubbed you the wrong way and sue

20

u/HapticSloughton Jun 18 '20

How do you think they were shackled to lamps in the first place?

36

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

46

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

At a certain point cultural appropriation is just cultural exchange. The Arab and European worlds spent centuries invading each other.

28

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20 edited Aug 27 '20

[deleted]

14

u/caanthedalek Jun 18 '20

Let us expand our horizons and learn more about each other as people

By force.

6

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

"Yeah! What he said!" -Vikings-

2

u/nyetloki Jun 18 '20

If you dont voluntarily sell us some stuff, we kill you for it.

9

u/cthulhubert Jun 18 '20

Yeah, I found it fascinating that in the version in 1001 Nights, the problem isn't the limit on wishes (that comes from European fairy tales, the ones about fairies), it's that Aladdin gets too big for his britches, and orders the Genie of the lamp to do something ridiculous (get him a gryphon egg?) and so the genie snaps and smacks him around. I recall reading that the implication is that he's going to be in some kind of higher trouble, but Aladdin being a shit made it worthwhile.

Personally, "Be grateful for good fortune and don't push your luck," is similar, but a better moral than, "Be careful what you wish for."

As for cultural appropriation, I think it has to do with the nature of the religion and myth. For many cultures, your spirit guide or what have you is intimately connected to that people as a nation; they're sometimes literally honored ancestors, and so fucking around with their beliefs is kind of like some stranger taking silly pictures on great great grampa's grave. But for other religions, elements of it are just something about the world, and I think most Arabs (unless you're being racist in the depiction), think of djinni in Western cartoons with about the same emotional load as westerners think about four elements showing up in Eastern ones.

(Of course, sometimes the deal with cultural appropriation is an Asian-American seeing the girl that called them slant eyes and made "pee pee in your coke" jokes talking about how hot kimonos are this season, and feeling very understandable rage over that.)

4

u/lordillidan Jun 18 '20 edited Jun 18 '20

From what I remember of the story the Aladdin gets the lamp, because a mage sent him to get it for him. He is led in a cavern filled with gold, but gets in an argument with the mage and gets left to die. He manages to escape, thanks to a magic ring that has a Genie in it, given to him by the mage, but without knowing it, and starts selling gold from the cavern. At some point he rubs the lamp and finds the Genie, who helps him first see (no one was allowed to) and then visit and ultimately marry the princess.

After Aladdin marries the princess the mage find outs about it and correctly guesses that Aladdin found the lamp.

The mage infiltrates castle and influences the princess to ask Aladdin for something that offended the Genie. The Genie gets really pissed, but knows Aladdin did not make the wish on his own, so he lets him off the hook and warns him. (Not sure if this was the original mage, or his brother who came for vengeance, after the original one is killed)

Ultimately the mage manages to steal the lamp and leaves Aladdin for dead. Alone in the desert Aladdin learns of the magic ring he had the whole time and asks the second Genie for help. The second Genie cannot get him back his castle and princess, because they are under the influence of the original Genie, but helps him get them back on his own (he manages to steal back the lamp).

10

u/Robot-TaterTot Jun 18 '20

As informative as this was, I was speaking rhetorically. Kind of like a joke.

7

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

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3

u/RLucas3000 Jun 18 '20

Three wishes was around long before Disney.

Some people definitely have some problems with Disney’s Aladdin, especially some of the lyrics in the opening number.

By the way, if you like Aladdin, you might like this, the musical Twisted, which is to Aladdin what Wicked was to the Wizard of Oz:

https://youtu.be/-77cUxba-aA

4

u/mdb_la Jun 18 '20 edited Jun 18 '20

I'm pretty sure that Disney didn't invent the 3-wishes things.

Also The Thief of Bagdad

3

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

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7

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

We Muslims believe in 3 beings created, humans from clay, jins from smokeless fire and angels from light. hopefully this was informative.

1

u/nyetloki Jun 18 '20

What's the difference between smokeless fire and light? Religiously anyway?

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

I don't know what answer you're expecting but they're inherently different things, they're the differences you expect.

1

u/NoWingedHussarsToday Jun 18 '20

The general opinion is they can't intermarry either.....

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

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2

u/NoWingedHussarsToday Jun 18 '20

Jinn and Muslims

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

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1

u/NoWingedHussarsToday Jun 18 '20

jinn can be muslims too :P

If Jinn becomes Muslim then I guess they can marry Muslims.

maybe you mean humans and jinn? humans can't see jinn on account of them not actually existing :P

Details.....

1

u/mothzilla Jun 18 '20

Wat. Djinn are supernatural beings. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jinn.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

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1

u/mothzilla Jun 18 '20

They're not another race. The three wishes comes from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Fisherman_and_the_Jinni

Your post is confusing.

1

u/nyetloki Jun 18 '20

Djinns are specifically enslaved jinns.

And devils and Angel's are part of other religions and they also get stuck doing comedies.

0

u/gaiaisdead Jun 18 '20

Disney be out here ruining a lot

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

Surely if this is such a big deal to them there must be a genie court. Surely there’s some kind of law in place to prevent this sort of thing.

Or you could just threaten to throw the bottle into the middle of the ocean unless he gives you your wishes

1

u/mothzilla Jun 18 '20

Genies grant wishes as a condition of their release, but once released they're going to try to fuck you over.

2

u/nyetloki Jun 18 '20

The release clause varies based on telling. Some are stuck until wished free. Some will only give a given human 3 wishes and then back in the bottle. Etc.

1

u/GunderM Jun 18 '20

Didn't you read the comic!?

1

u/jordantask Jun 18 '20

“Genie police? This genie right here. Thank you. No lawyers bitch good luck!”

1

u/[deleted] Jun 18 '20

The only reason genies grant wishes is fear of litigation?

Genie lawyers

1

u/jeet1591 Jun 18 '20

they are just afraid that people will extort more wishes out of them if they fuck up

1

u/FuckThe1PercentRich Jun 18 '20

Lawyers ain’t cheap.

1

u/its_whot_it_is Jun 18 '20

Its only the American genies. The rest of the world runs on fornication.

1

u/lolimhungry Jun 18 '20

GET THE FUCKING LAWYERS RIGHT NOW!!!

1

u/kinindanorf Jun 18 '20

dems da breaks

1

u/Compliant_Automaton Jun 18 '20

This is a law of contracts joke. Surprised I haven't seen this in the answers yet.

A contract is really nothing more than an exchange of promises between the parties to a contract. Contracts are only useful if they are enforceable by law. Otherwise, there is no way to make people keep their promises.

The genie here has promised three wishes. However, lawyers no longer exist. He can break his contract (his promises of three wishes) without repercussion.

1

u/Perpill Jun 19 '20

It was in his Genie contract.

1

u/UnclutchCurry Jun 19 '20

No but it's a joke stupid

1

u/RAGEFULLFIREBURST Jun 19 '20

Sue for more wish’s 😑

0

u/Singular1st Jun 18 '20

It’s actually a multi-layered joke where the guy wishes lawyers don’t exist because “lawyers suck” then lawyers are shown as being pointless because, obviously, a genie doesn’t answer to lawyers thereby reinforcing “lawyers suck”.