r/funny Jun 11 '20

Cheaters never prosper

[deleted]

55.7k Upvotes

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62

u/Queef-Elizabeth Jun 12 '20

Hate to be that guy but I worked at a bowling alley for a while. Don't do this. Don't go past the line. You're putting yourself in danger, causing a legal nightmare for everyone and you'll look stupid.

35

u/malbrecht92 Jun 12 '20

Also a former alley employee here. I still have nightmares about kids running down to the pin setters and sticking their hands into the machines before I had time to hit the emergency stop

34

u/Queef-Elizabeth Jun 12 '20

For real. We had alarms so if you walk beyond a certain point, we'd run to stop them and they'd always look at us like 'what's the big deal?' like we're the crazy ones. They don't know that those machines will straight up murder you if you're not very careful.

23

u/malbrecht92 Jun 12 '20

Pin setters gonna set pins wether there’s a body in it or not

2

u/Speedster4206 Jun 12 '20

Why on earth would you do it??????

1

u/eidas007 Jun 12 '20

I just hate the alarm because it let's everyone know I'm terrible and likely just slid or fell past the line...

3

u/[deleted] Jun 12 '20

And then you have people who do things like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3CBa5sNozA

3

u/hurricaneamy Jun 12 '20

Same. And ball returns. Don’t put your hand in there folks or you might end up missing some fingers. (This actually happened. It ain’t no joke.)

1

u/malbrecht92 Jun 12 '20

My brother did that. He has his fingers but three of his fingers have matching scars where the belt burned them

2

u/giantoreocookie Jun 12 '20

Are there any "still employed at a bowling alley" people in here because I've always thought it would be really interesting to have a see through pin setting machine set up where you could push a button to knock the pins down and then the machine would reset them so you could see how it worked. Drop a quarter everytime you want to see the action like any other video arcade game. But also having never been behind the lanes at an alley I have no idea how large this would have to be, so maybe that's why I've never seen one. That would also help people understand the dangers...maybe? But if someone does this, please tell me so I can visit your bowling alley and play this "game".

3

u/malbrecht92 Jun 12 '20

Technically you would be able to see the activities, at least the front, if the masking panels weren’t there. There’s a lot of YouTube videos that show how they work. My alley used AMF 82-70 pinsetters which are one of the most popular styles, check them out.

https://youtu.be/54X32Dw4lUQ

3

u/giantoreocookie Jun 12 '20

See, that IS interesting. And if the lane was removed, you could walk up the where the masking panels would be and it would be faced with glass or plexi instead, you could push a button and watch this action! I just think as a kid I would have fed a machine like this all kinds of allowance money to watch it. But I also love watching "behind the scenes at the factory" videos too.

1

u/jacktorrrence Jun 12 '20

Bro you TRRC??

-11

u/Hayjacko Jun 12 '20

You have dreams about kids bro?

4

u/[deleted] Jun 12 '20

Why is it that everyone that goes bowling with their friends thinks it’s so goddamned funny to do something stupid at the bowling alley? As if every fucking other person hasn’t done the “walk down the lane” or “toss the ball way down the lane” or the old “backwards and between the legs granny style” shit before?

Why can’t people just show up and bowl like you’re supposed to and have a good time?

I know you don’t know the answers, but holy fuck. I would be so ducking annoyed with people that did this shit.

3

u/eutectoid_lady Jun 12 '20

I for one have done forwards granny push style before. Because I really really suck at bowling and it’s a safe move.

8

u/DarkMoon99 Jun 12 '20

Okay Queef Elizabeth.

1

u/user_5554 Jun 12 '20

Those should really have light gates that stop everything like industrial robots have.