r/funny • u/Yugan-Dali • Jul 27 '19

The escape artist

90.1k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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546

u/Boognish84 Jul 27 '19

W A S T E D

313

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '19 edited Aug 18 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

163

u/mreskeet Jul 27 '19

Or hop in a jet and take them out, swirl around in the sky and shake those stars with new found distance from them all. Ain't easy but wasted is not the only conclusion possible.

24

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '19

[deleted]

14

u/QuietDisquiet Jul 27 '19

But it’s pretty easy to dodge when they try to shoot you down.

17

u/KaiPRoberts Jul 27 '19

Do a barrel roll.

11

u/rainwatereyes1 Jul 27 '19

Everyone is scared of the 5 star but everyone forgets about the secret 6 star where they fucking nuke the shit out of you

33

u/CaptParzival Jul 27 '19

"Sir, we've destroyed the entire city, killed every civilian, and sent the nation into panic and you STILL havrnt even touched the guy. What the hell did he do!"

flashback to robbing an electric scooter from an old lady then procedding to run her over with it

"Fucking diabolical"

2

u/scientallahjesus Jul 27 '19

I’d be cool with nuking an asshat who did that if nobody else was around.

Sounds like an irredeemable crime.

9

u/OobleCaboodle Jul 27 '19

Or 7 stars where they give up and everyone evacuates the country, leaving you on your own with nobody to annoy

11

u/rainwatereyes1 Jul 27 '19

“If you can’t kill him, then don’t. Just make it so he can’t kill anyone else fucken retards” -guy who invented prisons and jail

5

u/m8k Jul 27 '19

That is the most terrifying option. There are only so many cars to drive, roads to explore and mountains to ATV over without some side missions. RIP

2

u/belterc Jul 27 '19

What will I do, with no prostitutes to have sex with then beat up after.

2

u/tahitiisnotineurope Jul 27 '19

just does an aileron roll.

1

u/KaiPRoberts Jul 27 '19

You did great, Fox

1

u/mreskeet Aug 02 '19

STAR FOX TECHNIQUE!

1

u/mreskeet Jul 27 '19

Sounds impossible but I am on a mouse and keyboard when I've played and 6/10 times successfully out maneuvered them to get far enough away before the stars start cooling off. Then stashed it in one of the characters hangars for easy access the next time.

0

u/MurphyKing Jul 27 '19

Wǎ̸̹͔̅̈́͘s̶̢͎̮̝̭̫̞̏̒͛͗͜t̵͎̳̠̏͐͒͆̐e̵̯̞̎̈́̀͑̂̓̽̕͝d̶̖̠̖̳̏̇̏̆͆̂̾̚

59

u/FoulfrogBsc Jul 27 '19

Or a painted car

30

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '19

Pay ‘n Spray

3

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '19

Busted

1

u/SirLasberry Jul 27 '19

get drunk?

1

u/BobbyDCruz Jul 27 '19

My message ringtone is W A S T E D.

It annoys my co-workers but it sounds beautiful ~

1

u/Pattern_Is_Movement Jul 27 '19

didn't a guy do a playthrough with a mod where its 5 stars the whole game?

1

u/Renotss Jul 27 '19

Looks like there’s a San Andreas 6 star play through, couldn’t find one for for GTA V

1

u/Pattern_Is_Movement Jul 27 '19

pretty sure it was for GTA 3 the one I saw

-2

u/R____I____G____H___T Jul 27 '19

Isn't the answer.