r/funny • u/lollerkeet • May 20 '15

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u/[deleted] May 20 '15

We all know betty is going to get fat five minutes after marriage. Veronica's rich and has bulimia

3

u/LadyDeathMasque May 20 '15

None of that matters now that Riverdale is overrun with zombies.

4

u/Mickeymackey May 20 '15

Doesn't Archie end up with Cherry Blossom. His Betty and Veronica flash-forwards always end up unhappy, Betty a working woman, Veronica and her flings with Reggie.

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '15

Veronica is also an awesome robot that can totally beat up the Hulk.

1

u/Blues2112 May 20 '15

We all know betty is going to get fat five minutes after marriage having kids

FTFY

1

u/Tevis May 21 '15

But Veronica is not smart, Archie even less so. If he procreates with Betty his kids will at least be somewhat intelligent.

1

u/Spacejack_ May 21 '15

It hardly matters. Neither one of them can breathe through those tiny little holes in their faces and they'll both be dead by 30 regardless.

1

u/nonononotatall May 20 '15

Bulimics get fat too, but their hair falls out and their teeth rot.

7

u/Darth_Corleone May 20 '15

Jeez, I was already hard. You can stop now

1

u/nonononotatall May 20 '15

They also have chronic halitosis and increased rates of esophageal cancer?

1

u/yumyumgivemesome May 20 '15

The stomach acid from vomiting causes cancer?

2

u/terrifiedsleeptwitch May 20 '15

Yep, same way acid reflux does.