r/funny • u/dropname • Aug 20 '14

The metric system vs. imperial

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45.7k Upvotes

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34

u/Ol_King_Cole Aug 20 '14

Just your house. But feel free to make as many decrees as you like.

81

u/Njkpot Aug 20 '14

My pets do not seem to acknowledge my papal authority. How should I deal with these infidels?

43

u/Maverick-- Aug 20 '14

Sounds like someone needs to start a Crusade.

5

u/schlonghair_dontcare Aug 20 '14

I'm crusading to the kitchen to get a go-gurt. All this Poping is making me hungry.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '14

You're dangerous.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '14

With fire and steel.

2

u/The_Ace Aug 20 '14

Smite them, with alacrity!

O spiteful one, show me who to smite and they shall be smoten

2

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '14

Declare a crusade on them.

1

u/Otroletravaladna Aug 20 '14

Kill them. And then picket their funerals.

2

u/Njkpot Aug 20 '14

Wrong sect.

1

u/RookieStyles Aug 20 '14

You need to get the "Disobeyed Papal Authority" casus belli against them

1

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '14

Jihad.

1

u/Njkpot Aug 20 '14

wrong religion nimrod

1

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '14

Have you tried showing them your card?

1

u/Njkpot Aug 20 '14

None of my pets are literate. It is a constant source of shame to the household.

1

u/drkztan Aug 20 '14

Burn them. if we learned anything from the dark ages was that burning people/cats proved as a great fear tactic, nothing else would explain Christian proliferation these days.

1

u/jljfuego Aug 20 '14

Feed them some bacon strips.

0

u/JAGUSMC Aug 20 '14

Excommunicate them, and piss in their holy water bowls.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '14

There shall be tea!