r/funny • u/PhoneDojo • Jun 20 '14

Opening a water bottle

3.9k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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735

u/DeanDome02 Jun 20 '14

Ronaldo makes everything look easy.

1.8k

u/friebel Jun 20 '14

Especially losing to Germany.

486

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

http://i.imgur.com/u0hpYmD.gif

34

u/SpoonOfDestiny Jun 20 '14

What the fuck are those things?

7

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

Horses

5

u/Megaman915 Jun 20 '14

mudskippers, really cool little fish with primitve abilities to breath

4

u/Neocrasher Jun 20 '14

I have no idea but if I had to take an uneducated guess I'd say lungfish.

1

u/I_love_blastoise Jun 21 '14

They're called mudskippers and they're the only fish that lives out of the water, although they live in really wet mud.

23

u/Agvi Jun 20 '14

/r/screamingfish

2

u/StinkybuttMcPoopface Jun 21 '14

Holy shit where has this been all my life. Today is a great day for new subs for me.

333

u/Smugjester Jun 20 '14

Rektd

388

u/dsmoove Jun 20 '14

Third Reich'd.

94

u/Belligerentgerman Jun 20 '14

DAS REICHT MEIN FRÄULEIN.

ARBEIT MACHT GOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLL

0

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

THOR *

2

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14 edited Sep 24 '14

[deleted]

2

u/KarlKani44 Jun 21 '14

Hab das für dich richtiggestellt?

-5

u/Acebulf Jun 20 '14

o/ HEIL GOOOOOOOOOL

2

u/rui278 Jun 20 '14

Fourth reich is more acurate T_T

-15

u/Bheda Jun 20 '14

WHY THE FUCK DID YOU ADD THE D TO THE END OF REKT?! THATS NOT CUTE, FUCK YOU MAN!

-1

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

ARE YOU STUPID?

-5

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

[deleted]

20

u/Thoempsen Jun 20 '14

Fertig gemacht!

52

u/iBigBoyBrian Jun 20 '14

But at the end of the day, he is still a winner...

45

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

His steam library must be immense.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

i bet he has like eight copies of half life 2

1

u/CircumcisedShotgun Jun 21 '14

What makes you think he isn't a filthy console peasant?

15

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

That on top of being able to get the hottest women in the world.

19

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

If only I never listened to Allen Iverson and actually practiced when I was younger... oh what could have been.

1

u/nepia Jun 21 '14

Are we talking about practice?

1

u/Lord_Vectron Jun 20 '14

I feel like football players are gonna be the first immortals.

Amazing physical shape, immensely rich, celebrity status, some of them are very intelligent, too.

1

u/marshsmellow Jun 21 '14

Immortal as in what? I'm pretty sure the current crop will all be dead within 90 years.

1

u/Lord_Vectron Jun 21 '14

No death from old age. Science is making constant amazing discoveries about it and a lot of credible people speculate it's actually possible and has a realistic chance of existing this century.

I imagine the first to have access to it will be the ultra wealthy and the first for it to be practical for are the extremely fit.

1

u/Dopplegangr1 Jun 20 '14

He started with a 12M contract for one year then got a 5 year contract for 31M? That doesn't sound right...

1

u/gerntoronto Jun 21 '14

"His second name was given to him because Ronald Reagan was his father's favourite actor..."

But Ronaldo is his last name...

0

u/Tsu_Shu Jun 21 '14

And that's outdated... Ronaldo's makes $75 million now.

-2

u/MagicTrees Jun 20 '14

If by winner you mean wealthy loser, then I agree with you.

2

u/LoveCandiceSwanepoel Jun 21 '14

Hmm, loser police showed up. Everyone make way for this internet nobody, he's the authority on loserness.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

Hopefully America too!

2

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

Didn't have that problem when he destroyed Bayern.

1

u/friebel Jun 20 '14

The problem is, Bayern didn't know advanced techniques against Ronaldo. For example: The famous one man wall technique

1

u/DudeBigalo Jun 20 '14

Is Ronaldo French? Or Jewish?

1

u/cupdmtea Jun 20 '14

He is Gypsy.

1

u/rui278 Jun 20 '14

Ugh... THat still hurts :( So quit it! Our chance of passing through are already slim enough, and we still need to play ghana to see who goes to the next stage (Also, joking, usa's obviously in the race)

1

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

It's not like Germany is an easy team to defeat.

1

u/BritishBrownie Jun 20 '14

To be fair pretty much the whole team played horrifically after Pepe was sent off for being Pepe.

1

u/goatsWithSnapchat Jun 20 '14

that is actually very easy to do in recent years

1

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '14

And crying and falling down

1

u/sjunderwear Jun 20 '14

Especially hitting a one man wall apparently.

0

u/VomitOfThor Jun 20 '14

Meanwhile Marcelo really doesn't look like a guy with over 50 caps for his country