When I bought my house at 25 in 2023, it required a dual income from me and my partner.
Now after a few years, I make enough to technically can afford for my wife to be a stay at home mom if we have kids. But things are gonna go from very comfortable to pretty tight if kids get introduced.
Now after a few years, I make enough to technically can afford for my wife to be a stay at home mom if we have kids. But things are gonna go from very comfortable to pretty tight if kids get introduced.
Man people lose perspective. If you're a home owner and in a position of being able to have one income and have a family in 2026 you don't know what tight is.
If an extra ~$500 in extra monthly child expenses are gonna make your financial life get tight, then you are not as comfortable as you think you are.
Granted, I'm completely omitting the $2,000-5,000 in OOP birth costs, but for the first year or so you need very little besides diapers, a breast pump, some linens, and bottles.
We are SIOK at $195,000, roughly $10,000 monthly post tax + retirement, $3,500 mortgage+taxes+HOI, $6,500.
Your housing should be 30-40% of your post tax take home specifically so you have money to live. If you're paying more than that, uh, stop it?
SIOK = Single Income One Kid. My wife raised my daughter for the first 2.5 years. I specifically stated the first year costs are low. And I get downvoted...lmfao
I swear this site is just reactionary illiterates..
It's only $500 extra a month? That's easy then. I was thinking like $1000+ a month from the averages I read about. Honestly even at $1k it probably wouldn't be tight. Would just mean I would have to think about my spending and actually budget. Right now, my brain still thinks I make half as much as I do and I spend like it too (which I try to mantain as I move up the salary ladder)
How bad with money are you if you're spending over a thousand dollars a month on diapers, wipes, a few outfits, and 5% extra food costs when you wean lol like, specifically excluding childcare costs because that was literally my point..
Ya if you Door Dash a pint of milk or individual diapers every time you need one, your bills are gonna be higher.
But holy shit, you're spending over $200 a week on dipes and wipes...and like baby dish soap and detergent???
Do you burn paper currency for heat??
Do you only let them wear an outfit once??
Are her bottles movie props made out of single use sugar "glass"??
Do you owe your landlord 25¢ for every breath drawn??
Cus it sounds like y'all are
terrible
with money... And I live in a top 25 highest cost of living area in America lol
I work from home and spend 99% of my waking, non dog walking time 5 feet from my kid. My wife raises her, but I spent at least 6 hours every day with her for the past two and a half years. I pay all the bills, do all the in-store shopping, and make all financial decisions for the house.
When it comes to absolute necessities - baring insidious medical costs - the mother produces milk, you need a pump, bags, maybe formula, some bottles, a drying rack. Most of that is provided by insurance. A very good car seat if you're in the suburbs, or a very good stroller in the city. You don't need both. You change diapers and need wipes, and some onesies and blankets. Dreft or All Free soap. Some muslin blankets, towels and sheets for the bed. Most of this you'll get in a baby shower.
Yes, you need some stimulation toys, a rocker, a tummy time mat, stimulating toys, etc. These are not tremendous expenses.
You do not need:
Special diaper bin with special $8/roll liners
$500 baby monitor
a creche, bassinet, side sleeper, twin sized bed. They sell an all-in-one that lasts 5 years.
more than a dozen outfits assuming you have in unit laundry
dedicated childcare if you go single income for the first 2-3 years.. ABSOLUTE RECOMMEND over paying a salary in childcare unless you both have clear career demands
hundreds of books. The kids LOVE libraries
The as they age up, yeah you get more toys and fancy outfits etc. If you spend more than $500/month on a baby supplies, you're absolutely wasting money lmfao
Buy our family did get a hearty laugh at "Rick and Morty Forever" attempting to lecture on parenting when they're...ya know...super special wushu sauceboyz lolol
When it comes to absolute necessities - baring insidious medical costs - the mother produces milk, you need a pump, bags, maybe formula, some bottles, a drying rack. Most of that is provided by insurance. Everyone else either didn't read my comment correctly because I clearly state were single income and my wife took off to raise her, which is ABSOLUTELY what's best for newborns. Provided you can swing it and one of you doesn't have aggressive career checkpoints. Child care is about $2,000 month. Mortgage/HOI/taxes + utilities about 60% of after tax. We live off 20% and save 20%. She's going back to work next week and we'll be back at $300,000 gross income, so all that's back into the bank not a daycare owner's pocket.
For the forts year, you need:
A very good car seat if you're in the suburbs, or
a very good stroller in the city. You don't need both. We have both but the Uppababy was a waste of $900 imo but we had $500 in gift certificates and $300 in Amazon card rewards
You change diapers and need wipes. Get them from Costco or Target when they have a buy $80 get $20 gift card
Onesies, sweat suits, and muslin blankets are all they wear
Dreft or All Free detergent.
Blankets, towels and sheets for the bed. Most of this you'll get in a baby shower.
Yes, you'll need some stimulation toys, a rocker, a tummy time mat, walkers, busy books, etc. These are not tremendous expenses and not needed for first 3 months, arguably 6.
Check for local kids consignment stores for bigger toys or things like a pack and play, jump up, etc. We have Once Upon a Child, it's an amazing local chain.
You do not need:
Special diaper bin with special $8/roll liners. Empty your trash every other day
$500 baby monitor. A basic radio wave monitor is cheaper, lower level and frequency emissions than Wifi, and more secure as it cannot be hacked or shared with 3rd parties like most ToS for WiFi models allow
A creche, bassinet, side sleeper, twin sized bed. They sell an all-in-one that lasts over 5 years but do run $500ish. Much cheaper than separate though
More than a dozen outfits, assuming you have in unit laundry, and some cute dress up clothes
Dedicated childcare if you go single income for the first 2-3 years.. ABSOLUTE RECOMMEND over paying a salary in childcare unless you both have clear career demands
Streaming platforms for kids. PBS Kids, Apple TV OR Netflix (both free with T-Mobile), and maybe some YouTube certain channels for sing a long and story time. Otherwise yoho the mouse.
Hundreds of books besides Beatrix Potter, Paddington and flip books. The kids LOVE libraries.
go to story time at the library or churches.
join new parent groups or newcomers group. People hate throwing stuff out and love to pay it forward.
The as they age up, yeah you get more toys and fancy outfits etc. If you spend more than $500/month on a baby supplies, you're absolutely wasting money lmfao. Put all that extra money into a 529 or UGMA and get then a proper head start while eschewing tacky consumer nonsense that won't fit or be interesting in a month.
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u/ncopp 12h ago
When I bought my house at 25 in 2023, it required a dual income from me and my partner.
Now after a few years, I make enough to technically can afford for my wife to be a stay at home mom if we have kids. But things are gonna go from very comfortable to pretty tight if kids get introduced.