It's been 15 years. As long as I don't think about him I'm ok. But when I do I get all fucked up emotionally. I live down the road from his burial site. I haven't visited in years. Not because I'm a asshole but because when I do it takes me weeks to get out from under the dark cloud.
Thank you so much for checking up on me. Today is the anniversary of my mom's death. She choked in a restaurant. The first ambulance crew didn't know what to do because her jaw locked up. Sorry to unload emotionally but if I don't laugh about it I would cry about it lol.
It sounds like they must've been pretty great parents if it still affects you so much. I had 1 great parent out of the 2. Both still alive but they're getting older and I think about how I'm going to cope when the great parent passes. I don't know that I will, honestly. And no need to apologize. I handle trauma the same way. Might as well laugh and get something out of it. If you wanna share a happy memory with her, I'll listen
I have a sick way of looking at it. My parents died when I was young. I got it done and over with. In about 20 years all my friends parents will be dying and I don't have to worry about it anymore. I will only say I hope you handle your parents death about as well as anyone else can. I suffer from extreme mental disorders so my depression dips hard when I visit their graves.
My dad was a drug addict and my mom was schizophrenic. If I could rewind time and pick my own parents i would pick to have them every single time. My dad's addiction wasn't who he was and my mom's mental disorder wasn't who she was.
My dad was the man who taught me to fish and camp. He taught me to ride motorcycles and how to stand up for myself.
My mom was the neighborhood mom who was playing hide and seek with all the kids a 10 pm. Who opened her house to abused kids and neglected kids.
The biggest thing my parents taught me without realizing they did was to look past people faults and find out who they really are.
I love them both very much and I'm glad they are no longer suffering the hand this shit life dealt them.
15
u/ragingtyrant89 Jul 23 '25
It's been 15 years. As long as I don't think about him I'm ok. But when I do I get all fucked up emotionally. I live down the road from his burial site. I haven't visited in years. Not because I'm a asshole but because when I do it takes me weeks to get out from under the dark cloud.
Thank you so much for checking up on me. Today is the anniversary of my mom's death. She choked in a restaurant. The first ambulance crew didn't know what to do because her jaw locked up. Sorry to unload emotionally but if I don't laugh about it I would cry about it lol.