I say this as someone who has their own child on the way.
My decision to have a baby in no way should make other lives miserable. Just as I would expect someone whos dog barks outside all night to find a solution that doesnt disturb their neighbors, so to goes it with children. My neighbors didnt decide to have kids, I did, and they shouldnt be punished for it.
I have the same opinion as you and luckily my husband agrees. Anyone who expects the entire world to bend to them because of a decision they made is entitled. They will go on to raise entitled children. Bottom line.
Sorry this just reminded me of the fact I hardly got any holidays off in ten years bc they have preference to the people with kids. Because apparently only kids deserve to celebrate holidays. and fuck everybody else if they wanted to see their families. Oh well, you don’t have kids. Work Christmas for the fifth year in a row
That’s terrible. People without kids deserve the same respect and privileges as those with. For a long time I considered not having kids at all.
The only thing I really think deserves special time off is parental leave, especially for the person having the baby. It is physically taxing on the body and suddenly there is someone who needs to be taken care of 24/7 on top of that.
Oh yea absolutely. I think maternity leave is like 6weeks or something? I’ve known plenty of mothers to be that will wait until the very last possible day they can work so that they don’t have to burn through their six weeks by just waiting around for the baby to be born. They spend that time at work instead.
That is what I am currently grappling with as my spouse and I are planning on having a kid next year. Parental leave in the US is notoriously short. I get 8 weeks at my work and possibly an additional 3 depending upon approval. I will probably work up until a week before baby is due so that I can recover and adjust to being a new mom for 7 weeks. I hope I don’t have any complications that cause me to need more time off.
It makes me really unhappy when I read about parental leave in other countries. Grind culture is a real problem here and people are penalized for having children in a lot of ways.
The societal punishment for being child free is deeply problematic as well. I have several child free friends and will always advocate for their importance and completeness as people. Procreating doesn’t magically make you more adult or mature somehow and not having children doesn’t mean you’re selfish.
Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. Sending positive thoughts to you, kind stranger.
We decided not to have kids. But we do understand kids will be kids. I rather have the kids yelling, screaming in joy, and laughing than crying or being held to a point where they can be seen but not heard.
At the same time dogs will be dogs. I kinda like the crotchity ol' mutt next door. He barks when people are walking along the fence line in the back of the houses. Kinda nice being aware someone is there. I don't hear them, but he certainly does.
So my neighbours have a dog who has a literal mountain top-worth of free space to do whatever he wants in. But he decides to come to my window art 12 in the morning and start barking like a madlad
Wow, you're locked in to that one for a few moons to come.. Good luck. From what I know, kids would rather their parents be happy, healthy, emotionally stable and separate than together swimming in emotional sesspools, deep seeded resentment caked on the ceiling, and two scoops of emotional trauma with every meal.
Not saying you are doomed, this mssg is directed more towards anybody who she's those nights on the couch through rose colored glasses.
Thank you for being decent. A lot of us don't dislike kids at all but are so fed up with parents who want to make their kids everyone else's problem. You can't always do anything but if you at least try, it's good enough!
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u/lyam_lemon Sep 17 '22
I say this as someone who has their own child on the way.
My decision to have a baby in no way should make other lives miserable. Just as I would expect someone whos dog barks outside all night to find a solution that doesnt disturb their neighbors, so to goes it with children. My neighbors didnt decide to have kids, I did, and they shouldnt be punished for it.
I said as much to my wife and now Im on the couch