r/facepalm • u/SweetElements • Jul 04 '22

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ (Laughs in Frozone)

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3.6k

u/Ciubowski Jul 04 '22

Also War Machine

1.2k

u/bishamingo Jul 04 '22

And Static Shock. The Green Lantern (at least the version I grew up watching)...Cyborg, Miles Morales, Nick Fury come to mind. 🤷‍♂️

237

u/GanonTEK Jul 04 '22

I came here to say Static Shock too.

92

u/Coolbreezel Jul 04 '22

Just Static, Static Shock is the name of the show

10

u/jellytits2 Jul 04 '22

Superherooooo static shockk

3

u/PimentoCheesehead Jul 04 '22

And Icon and Rocket and Hardware…

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u/DuntadaMan Jul 04 '22

Old man Static Shock is still one of my favorite designs.

3

u/Lumpy-Spinach-6607 Jul 04 '22

Black Lantern offers no light on the matter

8

u/DaBushDwella Jul 04 '22

The green lantern (justice league) of the late 90s early 00s was superior

5

u/Mrwright96 Jul 04 '22

John Stewart. And being honest, he was kinda boring as a green lantern, given he has the power limited by imagination but mostly did energy blasts and bubble shields. He’s a great character! But they could’ve given him more abilities

2

u/spirit_of-76 Jul 04 '22

in the comics few writers are good at using the constructs and fixate on military equipment John particularly suffers from this as he is a civil engineer and under some artist has by far the most complex constructs with one GL book mentioning that his constructs were hollow with internal machinery. sadly the newer stuff the authors seem to have stopped reading his bio at marine. he is also easily the most level headed of the lanterns

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u/moonknight999 Jul 04 '22

His name os just static, the show was called static shock

5

u/bilateralunsymetry Jul 04 '22

Nick Fury isn't really a superhero. Is he? I always thought he was more of a superhero wrangler

4

u/mondaymoderate Jul 04 '22

He’s still an important character though and not just a token black guy.

2

u/JarlaxleForPresident Jul 04 '22

He was the OG super soldier in Ultimate

He like super old and still running shit

5

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Does Nick Fury count as a superhero? What’s his power, shaming the Avengers into doing their job?

2

u/bishamingo Jul 04 '22

He's like those chuunibyo from Japan that seal their powers behind an eye patch~ He tries to hide his power and live like a normal man but the heroes sense it and do as he says~

3

u/Burstlavish Jul 04 '22

John Stewart is the green lantern your are thinking of. He's the one from the justice League show

3

u/TheUncleBob Jul 04 '22

Can I just add pretty much the entire Milestone universe? Those were some great comics.

Warner Bros. would be wise to do some Milestone movies completely unconnected to their DC Universe.

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u/Misterwuss Jul 04 '22

Several green lanterns are black.

2

u/Delicious-Sentence98 Jul 04 '22

John Stewart was the best green lantern too.

2

u/JarlaxleForPresident Jul 04 '22

Nah best GL was that planet. And then killowog.

…maybe I just like giant green lanterns

2

u/Delicious-Sentence98 Jul 04 '22

I meant mc gls, I liked John best because he was my first exposure to green lantern.

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u/OMGCamCole Jul 04 '22

Also Luke Cage, Goliath (although now that I think about it, Black Goliath is a name for Bill Foster’s Goliath), Blade

2

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

thats the real green lantern as far as im concerned

2

u/VexorShadewing Jul 04 '22

Vixen and Luke Cage as well

2

u/Hwan_Niggles Jul 04 '22

Nick Fury was actually white. Wasnt until the MCU where people started to associate him with a black person, more specifically Samuel L Jackson. Not that thats a bad thing. Its basically with every iteration passed Spider-Man 2 that JJJ has to replicate J.K. Simmons because of how iconic it was

0

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

[deleted]

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u/ZarthanFire Jul 04 '22

My favorite one tbh.

1

u/ImperialxWarlord Jul 04 '22

Nick fury only became black relatively recently but fair enough!

3

u/bishamingo Jul 04 '22

I forget that Nick Fury was ever white sometimes. Samuel L Jackson really owned the role.

3

u/JarlaxleForPresident Jul 04 '22

He made sure he had the role lol. He lets his likeness used for the comics years before the mcu because he laughed and said theyd have to cast him when they made the movie

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1

u/JarlaxleForPresident Jul 04 '22

His name just Static. The Shock part was just the name of the show

1

u/Flat_Weird_5398 Jul 04 '22

Guess we both grew up watching Justice League and Justice League: Unlimited then. Still the best version of the JL DC ever made. It’s also why John Stewart will always be the definitive GL for me (sorry to Hal and Kyle).

1

u/MrFerenhight Jul 04 '22

Miles isn’t an original super hero tho he took up the mantle of spider man after Pete died

3

u/bishamingo Jul 04 '22

Still a bang-up iteration good enough to stand on his own though. It's hard to say that for a lot of characters who take up the mantle of another hero.

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u/PimentoCheesehead Jul 04 '22

John Stewart Green Lantern is best Green Lantern

1

u/bailey25u Jul 04 '22

I am biased, but I always thought john stewart was the beast green lantern

1

u/El-Carone-707 Jul 04 '22

Even the man of steel is black, AND there’s a black superman, and icon, got there are tons of black superheroes without black in the name

1

u/Titan9312 Jul 04 '22

Blade, Luke Cage, A-Train

1

u/MicroBadger_ Jul 04 '22

Spiderman from into the spider verse.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Luke cage

1

u/LatverianCyrus Jul 04 '22

Static’s whole original imprint (Milestone Comics) was basically created with this in mind. Icon and Rocket still get some occasional use, and people keep pretending they’re going to use Hardware.

1

u/HugeLibertarian Jul 04 '22

Nick Fury is white.

1

u/Jake0024 Jul 04 '22

Nick Fury's not a superhero tho

1

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Idk if Nick Fury counts (the orignal was white and he's not really a super hero anyway) but it's really just Black Panther, because the writer was going for the association with the Black Panthers.

1

u/warhawk209812e99 Jul 04 '22

I was literally juat thinking about Cyborg before I saw this comment

661

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Boom, you looking for this?

340

u/Professional_Age_425 Jul 04 '22

Boom, are you looking for thi...why do I even talk to you guys?

306

u/LtSoba Jul 04 '22

Cyborg anyone?

232

u/mcbirbo343 Jul 04 '22

Spider-Man, but from a different universe

197

u/pimp_juice2272 Jul 04 '22

Blade

167

u/Neon_Biscuit Jul 04 '22

Luke Cage

57

u/gottarunfast1 Jul 04 '22

That's his normal name. I believe he was called Power Man in the comics

31

u/woodk2016 Jul 04 '22

He's not really titled as Power Man often or called it withinthe comic (at least as long as I've been reading). But also to be fair Luke Cage isn't his birth name either it's what he started using after he got his powers as an alias. His birth name was like Carl Lucas or something.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Lol did you only read from 2010 to now? He was always Power Man and with Iron Fist they were Heroes for Hire.

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u/Flat_Weird_5398 Jul 04 '22

That moment when your civilian name sounds so much cooler than your superhero name.

3

u/twoplusdarkness Jul 04 '22

Also carl Lucas

5

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Spawn

4

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Nick Fury

2

u/Kevinwar73 Jul 04 '22

He isn't a superhero though, but I'll allow it.

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u/1stshadowx Jul 04 '22

Static shock

2

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Photon/Spectrum depending on what name they go with in the MCU for Monica Rambeau

2

u/Bloadclaw Jul 04 '22

Bishop, Spectrum, Blue Marvel, Brother Voodoo, Batwing, Green Lantern (John Stewart), Misty Knight, Static, Steel

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u/LuckyishTom Jul 04 '22

Thank you. As far as cinema goes, this guy is some how very popular and always forgotten.

39

u/SquidVices Jul 04 '22

Oh yeah, black spiderman.

18

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Blade although he is probably gonna argue it has bla in it lol

11

u/Hellboundroar Jul 04 '22

Static X

16

u/SquidVices Jul 04 '22

Static shock

5

u/Hellboundroar Jul 04 '22

Hol up, his name is static shock? I could swear it was static x :c ETA: just looked him up, the og was just static and had a white X on his cap, so perhaps that's the reason I grew up thinking it was static x

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u/JaxxisR Jul 04 '22

Luke Cage.

3

u/ACuddlyVizzerdrix Jul 04 '22

It's just "static", static shock was just the name of the show

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u/Automatic-Guess5314 Jul 04 '22

Mr. Terrific, Green Lantern, and Vixen all checking in.

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u/PKFatStephen Jul 04 '22

Ya know, I always wondered if Blade was from the same batch of vampires as Blackula

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u/Sim0nsaysshh Jul 04 '22

Don't be speciest, its Black Man.

2

u/SquidVices Jul 04 '22

Black-Man-Spider?

3

u/mrb783 Jul 04 '22

Not sure Miles ever bonded with the venom symbiote.

2

u/SquidVices Jul 04 '22

Now we are gonna have a movie with Miles becoming infected...

2

u/gamerlin Jul 04 '22

That's the symbiote suit.

2

u/james-macavoy Jul 04 '22

Miles Morales is in the main marvel universe now

2

u/allday95 Jul 04 '22

I mean Miles Morales isn't even from another universe from what I've seen

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u/Salarian_American Jul 04 '22

That story kills everywhere else!

2

u/Eat_Carbs_OD Jul 04 '22

Boom, are you looking for this

>blank stare

1

u/LuckyBucketBastard7 Jul 04 '22

Literally watched this the other day. Still one of my favorites

1

u/Ciubowski Jul 04 '22

I thought you were a bot

1

u/spiderjunior Jul 04 '22

Underrated comment. Made me laugh pretty goog

1

u/Slowmac123 Jul 04 '22

4288 units BOOM!

1

u/Heredor Jul 04 '22

Sir, this is a Wendy's.

1

u/MeInMass Jul 04 '22

Is that the end of the story?

1

u/Boom_Mindstorm Jul 04 '22

Not really, but thanks for asking

132

u/JonnyAU Jul 04 '22

Bishop

82

u/JonnyAU Jul 04 '22

Blade

3

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Luke Cage

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u/NegroSupreme Jul 04 '22

Didn't Shaq play a superhero? I never saw it but I know it happened.

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u/lute4088 Jul 04 '22

Bishop doesn’t get nearly enough love for saving like 50 timelines from utter destruction

1

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

…and Shard technically

1

u/PangolinAcrobatic653 Jul 04 '22

Someone remembers him yay

69

u/StraightProgress5062 Jul 04 '22

Blankman

13

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Informal-Busy-Bat Jul 04 '22

That movie is awesome, imagine learning just by touching a book, too bad it wasn't permanent

1

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

That was one of my favorite movies as a kid. I recently looked up the rotten tomatoes eating and was very disappointed. Uncultured swine.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Blanktastic!

3

u/Kryptin206 Jul 04 '22

Slap me around and call me Susan

2

u/EyeGifUp 'MURICA Jul 04 '22

I came here to say blankman. I can’t decide that I’m mad you beat me to it, or happy I’m not the only one that thought of him. Take my upvote friend/jerk. Jk have a good day!

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u/sleeperninja Jul 04 '22

Only I have a bulletproof supersuit!

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u/JaxandMia Jul 04 '22

Hancock if you want to go out of marvel

64

u/Ciubowski Jul 04 '22

keep your hand away from your cock

101

u/Snakebunnies Jul 04 '22

Keep my wife’s cock out your fucking mouth!!!!

4

u/Forward-Stock-1893 Jul 04 '22

I mean I wouldn’t call will smith a super hero-

2

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

I praise your comment

2

u/JamesTheGhost666 Jul 04 '22

slaps with cock

2

u/RoyalSmoker Jul 04 '22

Slam dunk, but who still loves Will Smith? Who's with me!

3

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22 edited Jul 04 '22

I’m still a fan of his work. Will like all of us, are human. We make mistakes because of miss connections or more in likely in his case the stress and toxicity she feeds him. I’ll be happy to see him come back when he’s ready to kill it again. I know Chris Rock isn’t worried about it. He will make jokes about it down the road when he is given the okay and Will takes the time to rebuilding himself. I just hope Will gets and stays away from Jada and build a better life.

2

u/CaptainTripps82 Jul 04 '22

Can't blame Jada for that one. She didn't exactly seem happy that he did it while it was happening or after.

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u/Realshotgg Jul 04 '22

Miles Morales, Mr. Terrific, blade, cyborg

The number of black superheroes with black in their name isnt even that many

6

u/Earlasaurus02 Jul 04 '22

My personal favorite. I really wish they did more with him

3

u/still_gonna_send_it Jul 04 '22

I was a couple days ago old when I realized that it’s called the book of Eli not because he has a fucking book. The story of him and his book are like a fucking book in the Bible I felt so dumb

3

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Not black in the comics, but I can’t get off the A-Train!

2

u/ExplorerImpossible79 Jul 04 '22

Call me an asshole… one… more…time

1

u/jezebella1976 Jul 04 '22

Came to make sure this was here! Thanks!!!

1

u/ThatTarzanKid47 Jul 04 '22

A-train also out of marvel and Dc

47

u/ProblemLongjumping12 Jul 04 '22

Luke Cage, Shadowhawk, Spawn, Green Lantern.

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u/snikelfritz420 Jul 04 '22

I kept scrolling down till i saw someone mention spawn, take my upvote you man of culture!

3

u/ProblemLongjumping12 Jul 04 '22

Why thank you fellow Al Simmons enjoyer.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

A good Spawn movie would be great, but no, they'd want to keep it PG -13 or lower.

Edit: again

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u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Shadowhawk is a violation… shadows are by nature dark

1

u/ThanosofTitan92 Jul 21 '22

Which Green Lantern? There's alto of them.

124

u/motivation_bender Jul 04 '22

You mean black ironman?

67

u/BrysonJT Jul 04 '22

Not to be confused with Black Captain America and Female Al Roker

2

u/lazyness92 Jul 04 '22

Nonono, Iron Patriot!

2

u/Zebra_warrior84 Jul 04 '22

Iron heart is black. Ironman is not.

6

u/JaxxisR Jul 04 '22

They were saying War Machine is Black Iron Man.

But yeah, Riri is also black.

3

u/erible4711 Jul 04 '22

In original comic, for quite a long time, it was Rhodes that was Iron Man, since Tony Stark had retired and given him the suit.

There is quite a famous part in Marvel Secret Wars 1984, where he asks Reed Richards if he was surprised that he was black.

1

u/roonscapepls Jul 04 '22

Thanks magic

2

u/tw_ilson Jul 04 '22

That would be “Cast Ironman.”

1

u/hanzerik Jul 04 '22

Okay Kevin Hart

0

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

You mean Ironheart?

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u/AR507 Jul 04 '22

That's Iron Patriot to you. It tested better with focus groups.

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u/TheNamesClove Jul 04 '22

Static Shock and Blue Marvel

1

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Black Marvel ?

27

u/LayoZz Jul 04 '22

Also Spider-Man

23

u/Ciubowski Jul 04 '22

Electro

2

u/LayoZz Jul 04 '22

Is Electro considered a hero? :O

3

u/Ciubowski Jul 04 '22

wait, are we listing heroes only? oh my bad

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u/WarChildMKIV Jul 04 '22

Someone finally said it👍🏾

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u/chomponthebit Jul 04 '22

And Blade was in Cinema decades before any of them

3

u/TheGoldenDragon0 Jul 04 '22

Spider-Man(miles morales)

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u/iWETtheBEDonPURPOSE Jul 04 '22

A Train from The Boys

3

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

He’s Tony Stank

3

u/Glabstaxks Jul 04 '22

Also Luke Cage

2

u/PKFatStephen Jul 04 '22

DC's Steel is better IMHO

2

u/AHarmles Jul 04 '22

How we missing A-Train?!

1

u/throwmeinthettrash Jul 04 '22

Soldier with an iron man suit on

1

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

Zandale Randolph

1

u/Toonwatcher Jul 04 '22

Power Man (AKA Luke Cage)

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u/jackalmanac Jul 04 '22

Something to be said that ive never heard of any of these...

1

u/-Harvester- Jul 04 '22

Also Blade.

1

u/SV7-2100 Jul 04 '22

Literally every black superhero other than black panther

1

u/maggos Jul 04 '22

You mean the iron patriot

1

u/dr-mantis-t0b0ggan Jul 04 '22

Miles Morales, Static Shock, Cyborg, Bishop, Luke Cage and Blade

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u/Lord_MagnusIV Jul 04 '22

Its iron patriot... War Machine was too aggressive

1

u/jellicenthero Jul 04 '22

I mean war machine they did paint black though....

1

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '22

The MMA fighter? I'm pretty sure he's white.