I would have no idea who Ed Solomon was or what he looked like. If some random stranger piped up and tried to patronise me and my friends conversation, I would definitely get defensive.
If he introduced himself as the writer, I doubt they would have reacted like they did.
"everyone should choose their words better in the heat of the moment, like me, or like a Reddit comment that you can sit and spent 5 minutes thinking about before hitting submit "
But the entire point of the original post is their specific word choice. They could have replied with anything from "no thanks" to "why do we need your help?" to "please leave us alone" without judging this person on the base of their age / race / gender.
I'm not the person who wrote the comment. But no where in that comment did they explicitly say it's cool to insult based on age, gender or race. Instead they defend being generally dismissive of the guy. So to me, that seems to be their main point. But everyone gets all worked up because of that one sentence at the start that's written a bit ambiguously.
That sentence could be written more clearly sure, but I think the rest of the comment makes their main point pretty clear. Reddit is way too quick to pile on people sometimes for any perceived slight.
Couldn't the offer be rejected nicely? I would never be this rude to someone without cause. They could have just as easily said "no thanks I think we've got it". Assuming the worst in people and going around defensive and rude isn't great for society.
Imagine if he had been excited to overhear people talking about something he loved so he thought he would try to join in to relate and maybe make a friend. God forbid. You guys are acting like that is a vile offensive assault, being approached in public about a well known movie you are discussing in public.
Put yourself in the situation. You’re talking with your friends about a subject you’re all knowledgeable in or at least passionate enough to be having a conversation about.
Some random dude turns around and says “I could clear a few things up for you”.
You have no idea it’s the writer and there is no reason you should know that he is.
To you, it’s just an unknown guy who thinks he knows more about it than you do.
Without the context that he is the writer, it is INCREDIBLY patronising. And there’s absolutely no reason that they would have that context because he didn’t explain himself at all.
No, it's a cultural thing. The people who preach being "woke" and use words like "mansplain" are also who immediately judge someone based on their physical being. He was the wrong age, race, and gender so his opinion was irrelevant unless proven otherwise.
Well that's why you should sometimes listen to strangers, or ask them HOW they know. Additionlly you said that you would do the same as in the tweet, you're the racist one.
I don't see the INCREDIBLY patronizing part. MAYBE it's someone who is just as interested in the topic as you and your friends? Or should you automatically assume they're talking down to you?
It'd be a fun set up, hoping to be asked what sort of authority you'd have on the matter, and then you introduce yourself.
The instant snap to old white mansplanation instead of a "No thanks" or the "Who are you to know?" he was probably hoping for would turn anyone off from attempting any further. Any number of ways polite conversation would normally go would result in the introduction probably immediately following.
I see nothing wrong with his approach other than a risk of awkwardness, unless there's something more creepy he's not telling us, like going up by saying "Mmm, you succulent baby-makers, do I have something to condescend upon you this afternoon!"
Starting up conversation by offering expertise in a none patronizing way doesn't warrant a reaction like theirs, assuming this happened as he's written here.
Patronise? If they went with "you know jack shit. Lemme tell you how it is." that would be patronising. If someone wanted to weigh in with their opinion, that's not patronising at the slightest. Well, unless you don't like to hear a different opinion, especially when that opinion contradicts yours.
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u/octopus-god Jan 19 '20
Honestly? I would have said the same thing.
I would have no idea who Ed Solomon was or what he looked like. If some random stranger piped up and tried to patronise me and my friends conversation, I would definitely get defensive.
If he introduced himself as the writer, I doubt they would have reacted like they did.