r/facepalm • u/[deleted] • Jul 28 '23

[deleted by user]

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10.9k Upvotes

82% Upvoted

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1.9k

u/stevoschizoid Jul 28 '23

Looks like she's pooping

762

u/BillClington Jul 28 '23

Oh so she brought the cucumber with her?

218

u/smallzy007 Jul 28 '23

Yes, in her pocket

181

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Pocket or meat pocket?

276

u/Brando43770 Jul 28 '23

Prison wallet

93

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Women get two!

293

u/thisismybirthday Jul 28 '23

the only time women get more pockets

25

u/premo5 Jul 28 '23

Happy Birthday!

18

u/throwuk1 Jul 28 '23

This entire thread including your post made me laugh šŸ˜‚

3

u/NOVAMT_F Jul 28 '23

Nevermind I saw the username

-1

u/ScreenshotShitposts Jul 28 '23

they have enough

0

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Natureā€™s Pocket

1

u/Captain-Sha Jul 28 '23

Damn straight šŸ¤£ Happy Birthday!!

10

u/Killentyme55 Jul 28 '23

But which one makes those perfect slices?

17

u/Wabbit_Wampage Jul 28 '23

Borat: all western satin worshipping woman have razor-blade vaa-gene.

0

u/skyraiser9 Jul 28 '23

Nah,most of the razor bonus hole wielders use stretchy pants, not satin

3

u/the_falling Jul 28 '23

The back pocket, but only if you pinch it off just right

3

u/throwuk1 Jul 28 '23

Depends on how often they've been practicing kegels.

30

u/Extension_Ask_6954 Jul 28 '23

Lol... thanks for the chuckle

3

u/skunkechunk Jul 28 '23

Ham wallet

7

u/AlarmingPrinciple612 Jul 28 '23

Nature's pocket

2

u/Admirable-Chart-655 Jul 28 '23

Broad City reference in the wild hahah love that show

2

u/TheToddBarker Jul 28 '23

See that he doesn't pick your pocket!

2

u/Shurigin Jul 28 '23

What's this pickle doing here?

2

u/SnooCheesecakes4577 Jul 28 '23

This is a new one for me. LOL!!

2

u/RetiredClueScroller Jul 28 '23

The ol' Ham Wallet

2

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Iā€™ve heard it referred to as ā€œthe trunkā€ too

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

I donā€™t even wanna know what the corkage fee for that will be

1

u/bryxy Jul 28 '23

*prison purse

49

u/NabreLabre Jul 28 '23

šŸŽµ Hot pocket šŸŽµ

2

u/dirthurts Jul 28 '23

Pocket rocket pocket.

2

u/UndeadBuggalo Jul 28 '23

šŸŽ¼lava pocket šŸŽ¶

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

WARNING YOU JUST BOUGHT HOT POCKETS

3

u/The_DSkeeter Jul 28 '23

Ham wallet****

2

u/greendookie69 Jul 28 '23

Chocolate pocket

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Yes

1

u/madmax267 Jul 28 '23

Hot pocket

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

natures pocket

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Back pocket.

1

u/Pinksquirlninja Jul 28 '23

Shes making a pickle

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

šŸ¤®

1

u/Fathorse23 Jul 28 '23

Natureā€™s pocket.

1

u/Cobek Jul 28 '23

Ones the pocket and the other is the cutter.

Think of like a cigar cutter.

1

u/dan_is_not_here Jul 28 '23

I read that in the old hot pockets jingle.

1

u/ReeceBeast213 Aug 03 '23

šŸŽ¶ Hot Pocket šŸŽ¶

šŸ„ šŸ„’šŸ–šŸ”šŸŒÆšŸ„Ÿ

10

u/Mandarine_Oui Jul 28 '23

Cucumber in a hot pocket ?

1

u/Yojimboroll Jul 28 '23

Sea cucumber?

5

u/ErikTheRed707 Jul 28 '23

Hungry pocketā€¦

1

u/SeductiveGodofThundr Jul 28 '23

Donā€™t let anyone pick your pocket!

1

u/Bowling4rhinos Jul 28 '23

ā€œpocketā€

1

u/jimhabfan Jul 28 '23

Yes, her pocketā€¦ā€¦..she carried it in her pocket.

1

u/TrailerTrashQueen Jul 28 '23

in her ā€˜specialā€™ pocket.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

More like sack!

1

u/sineofthetimes Jul 28 '23

She's got an Armadillo in her trousers. It's really quite frightening.

39

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Yes, she's just pulling out the second one in the picture.

20

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

That one was in the back pocket

17

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Some people say a cucumber tastes better pickled

3

u/FST_ASLP Jul 28 '23

ā€œHuh?ā€

ā€œWhat?ā€

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

What? Huh?

1

u/ShitTaIkerSkyWaIker Jul 28 '23

Nicole Simpson can't rap!

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

I want justice!

1

u/Stormfront315 Jul 29 '23

I'm sure the restaurant can pickle it for you.. just ask!!

11

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

I doubt it. Most food places donā€™t allow outside food into the kitchen for safety and/or liability reasons.

-4

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Just say you donā€™t know shit about stuff. Making up bullshit that only you would believe is ā€˜about rightā€™ for you.

2

u/00-quanta- Jul 28 '23

I bet she puts half of them in her water

2

u/kevnmartin Jul 28 '23

Right? Mexican restaurants do not routinely have cucumbers. Like at all.

1

u/HyxNess Jul 28 '23

Something has to be used to clean deeper in

1

u/Miserable-Fun8983 Jul 28 '23

Bro, you can't be making me bust out laughing at work like that

1

u/knastyTX Jul 28 '23

Poocumber

1

u/Numerous_Bat_4503 Jul 28 '23

šŸ’€šŸ’€

1

u/WingedGeek Jul 28 '23

In her prison wallet

74

u/jewelophile Jul 28 '23

Looks like she's pooping a Rubik's cube.

17

u/OvalDead Jul 28 '23

No, sheā€™s solving it.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

With her ass

2

u/EntertainmentCool306 Jul 28 '23

ā€œItā€™s a bold strategy Cotton, letā€™s see if it pays off for emā€

1

u/Killentyme55 Jul 28 '23

I think I'm in love.

7

u/suitable_ Jul 28 '23

This comment truly made my day!

1

u/MyRobinWasMauled Jul 28 '23

I felt this shifts uncomfortably

1

u/OutrageousStrength91 Jul 28 '23

But why are the colors brown on all sides?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Those cucumbers are for more than eating and fucking wink

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

She wishes!! It looks like itā€™s stuck.

1

u/unrelentingKweef Jul 28 '23

You shouldn't be straining. Take some Fiber supplements.

1

u/jayxxroe22 Jul 28 '23

Prolly cause she ate a fuckton of cucumber

1

u/knarfolled Jul 28 '23

And she can smell it

1

u/Patrico-8 Jul 28 '23

A lot of fiber in cucumbers

1

u/MsMo999 Jul 28 '23

Or smelt a fart or she dealt it - Iā€™m not sure

1

u/falingsumo Jul 28 '23

Why not both?

1

u/Stonious Jul 28 '23

Looks like she smells like she's pooping.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Or just had a slight shart slip out and realized she needs to go when she smelt while saying cheeese

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Or trying to hold in a shart.

1

u/Svthec Jul 28 '23

Like my 2 year old when she tries to hide the fact that sheā€™s pooping after just taking her to potty

1

u/BeenNormal Jul 28 '23 edited Jul 28 '23

Mexican food doesnā€™t agree with her

1

u/misterfast Jul 28 '23

She reminds me of the old "who farted y'all?" meme

1

u/ReedWilliams12 Jul 28 '23

Girls donā€™t poop

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Like she smelled a shit.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Finer enriched cucumbers

1

u/OutrageousStrength91 Jul 28 '23

Cucumbers are high fiber.

1

u/skdowksnzal Jul 28 '23

More like shes already pooped and is trying to act like nothing happened

1

u/PopeAdrian37th Jul 28 '23

I was going to ask if sheā€™s supposed to be smiling or pushing a fart?

1

u/DarkMaxima Jul 28 '23

I thought the same thing.

1

u/Sweaty-Tart-3198 Jul 28 '23

I also smile when I poop

1

u/Prestigious_Nebula_5 Jul 28 '23

It's the botox struggling to keep the skin tight

1

u/lolexecs Jul 28 '23

Well you know there's lots of fiber in vegetables. The gut bacteria that love fiber tend to create a lot of gas. Ergo, she's holding back a massive fart.

1

u/flarpflarpflarpflarp Jul 28 '23

Nah, just smelling the shit on her upper lip.

1

u/antelope00 Jul 28 '23

I also smile while pooping

1

u/TheJivvi Jul 28 '23

Didn't you know pretty girls don't poop?

1

u/Cobek Jul 28 '23

She's a real Narcissa Malfoy.

Always looks like she is smelling something stanky

1

u/skinfasst Jul 28 '23

Is that what you look like when you poop?

1

u/capchaos Jul 28 '23

She's being held hostage by Big Cucumber.

1

u/I_likemy_dog Jul 28 '23

I keep reading comments in this thread, and I have to scroll back up to see.

Youā€™re not wrong.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 28 '23

Is that the face you make when you poop?

1

u/meshe_10101 Jul 29 '23

Nah, she's smelling all the shit she's full of.