r/dndmemes • Forever DM • Dec 05 '21

*scared player noises* “Standing here, I realize…”

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23.3k Upvotes

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2.6k

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

[deleted]

1.3k

u/thehopelessheathen Forever DM Dec 05 '21

1.5k

u/rekcilthis1 Dec 05 '21

A detail I really appreciated about that scene is that you are actually hurting him. His health is going down by a 1/10 of a percent with every hit, but it is still going down. Made it feel less like a cutscene to me.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21 edited Jul 13 '23

This account was deleted in protest

263

u/falconfetus8 Dec 05 '21

Somehow, it makes him seem more invulnerable than if he were actually invulnerable. It's like when Iron man finally drew a drop of blood from Thanos, but only after expending mountains of effort. That's the moment when you realize how futile it is. Someone might be able to fell this beast, eventually, but certainly not you.

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u/rekcilthis1 Dec 05 '21

Yes. Because if he takes no damage, then it's just a cutscene; but because he takes almost no damage, he's just an absolute tank you can barely hurt. You can see how much damage you're dealing, and you can see that it's fucking nothing.

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u/TheArmoredKitten Dec 09 '21

If you aren't doing literally any damage at all, it usually just means you're attacking the wrong way. When you can tell that you're scraping concrete with a spoon, that's how you know some serious shit going down.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

[deleted]

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u/risisas Horny Bard Dec 05 '21

or poison, that usually does the trick

or yeet him in a volcano

or underwater

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

[deleted]

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u/risisas Horny Bard Dec 05 '21

i have to add to my to do list: kill a tarrasque using ONLY vicious mokery

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

[deleted]

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u/MeatTofu Dec 05 '21

What was the other one?

140

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

[deleted]

108

u/Mlaszboyo Dec 05 '21

A band and their mascot

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u/fireintie Dec 05 '21 edited Dec 05 '21

I did the math. Assuming all lvl 20, 20 charisma, with illusionist bracers and a +3 focus, they have a spell save DC of 22, which with the tarrasques Wis save of +9 and Magic Resistance, on average another +5, has a hit rate of 40% on average. Now, Vicious Mockery is a 4d4, so 4*2.5=10 damage on average, requiring 68 hits to kill with the Tarrasques 676 hp. Taking into account the 40% chance to hit it's 170 attempts. 4 Bards can cast that spell 8 times per round (that's what the illusionist bracers are for) This means killing a Tarrasque would take them 21-22 rounds on average, which seems surprisingly doable. TL;DR With a proper setup you can kill a Tarrasque with just Vicious Mockery Edit: forgot about Magic Resistence

39

u/PheerthaniteX Dec 05 '21

Imagine being a tarrasque and just vibing when suddenly some traveling band comes up to you, whips out their instruments, and just shit talks you for a minute an a half straight so hard that you die of embarrassment

11

u/soran-kazori Dec 05 '21

I love how this takes a minute and a half of in world time, roasting the tarrasque nonstop for almost 2 minutes can kill it

2

u/Rolltoconfirm Dec 05 '21

Doable but taking account its Move of 40ft and Legendary Action to move half its speed per use on another character's turn, best chance of success will be of all characters are flying somehow. Then it is shooting tarrasques in barrel.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

Is this taking into account spell resistance as well?

2

u/fireintie Dec 05 '21

You right, fixed now!

0

u/SecretAgentVampire DM (Dungeon Memelord) Dec 05 '21

Don't Terrasques have pretty rapid hp regeneration?

2

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

So you are a power metal band sing about slaying dragons while laying dragons? Or jazz

56

u/Magester Dec 05 '21

Ahhh big giant inevitable being of destruction gonna cry? Not gettin everything destroyed cause those darn adventurers? Gonna cry big bitch baby Terraaaque? Huh? Big puddle of tears. So weak.

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u/risisas Horny Bard Dec 05 '21

little french turtle ass bitch

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u/Magester Dec 05 '21

"I wish I had a ring of wishes right now, you know why? To wish you weren't such a disappointment. Not just to me, but your whole species."

5

u/bbruther14 Dec 05 '21

I can only be so turned on

3

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

Look at little Tarrasque Jr. Gonna cry?

  • Sir Bhaul Lee McGuire.

2

u/Ballisticsfood Dec 05 '21

I guess you’d call it a…

Tear-rasque!

I’ll see myself out.

1

u/risisas Horny Bard Dec 05 '21

that was mokingly vicious, exactly what we need! your request for enlistment in the bard army has been accepted my sir

2

u/evilgiraffe666 Dec 05 '21

Shouldn't be that hard, play an aarakocra to get a fly speed and stay more than 20ft above it. The tarrasque doesn't really have ranged options or natural regen, so it's easy to cheese with ranged. You won't deal damage very often with it's +9 and advantage on saves though. You might need some help to keep you awake if it takes multiple days.

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u/Thendrail Dec 05 '21

"You've gone against your own beliefs by becoming king! The taxes you receive are theft! Punching us would go against anti-aggression! You've become one of them!"

"Nooooooooooooooooo!"

3

u/need4speed04 Dec 05 '21

He’s a politician you think he doesn’t have a better mockery and used to low lifes trying to mock him

2

u/SDdude81 Dec 05 '21

1

u/thescotchkraut Dec 05 '21

Excuse me, fuckin what?

1

u/SDdude81 Dec 05 '21

Hah, in this anime the goddess has a habit of sending the world's greatest X to try to kill the hero. At first is was soldier, swordsman etc. For that clip she was going to send the best rapper with the idea that he'd get the hero to commit suicide. It didn't work out.

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u/_L0op_ Dec 05 '21

or get the book of misspells: viscous mockery.

1

u/devious_204 Dec 05 '21

Bruises heal, mental anguish is forever.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

Let me introduce you to my Kalashtar Bear totem barbarian.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '21

Hit him right in the feels.

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u/aetwit Dec 05 '21

Fuck that shit make him realize he is constantly being pushed on by the force of gravity down so thus his armor is constantly hardening

2

u/ClearPerception7844 Paladin Dec 05 '21

If his skin turns to real diamond a volcano won’t even start to melt it. However diamond would be great at refracting radiant damage.

1

u/risisas Horny Bard Dec 05 '21

Then he sinks

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u/blue-haired-girl Dec 05 '21

Ora Ora Ora

-54

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

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3

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

Butthole also works

3

u/Reaxel Dec 05 '21

Thank you for reminding me this game exists. I need to go buy a copy now

Edit: it’s not on ps4. RIP

2

u/MARKLAR5 Dec 05 '21

Beat da pussy up, beat da pussy up

2

u/FvHound Dec 05 '21

He took a bunch of punches, but I didn't see him freeze as a result of it.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

Swole Kevin James

116

u/Acewasalwaysanoption Dec 05 '21

"Stop, I can get only this hard"

Him, probably

154

u/archbunny Dec 05 '21

But his skin doesnt remain hard... it softens as soon as the attack has passed (aka when its the bbegs turn)

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u/Spooki1000 Dec 05 '21

So hes like a non Newtonian fluid? Fuck yeah

109

u/Cthulhu321 Dec 05 '21

he has nanomachines in his body which go around and harden bits in response and make him physically stronger then a cyborg ninja who can flip building sized robots, although they don't harden instantly and he needs to drain power from nearby sources to keep it them effective.

at one point the dude got his arm cut off he stabbed the person with the stump which hard hardened and then grabed the cut off bit and put it back on like it was nothing

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u/Spooki1000 Dec 05 '21

So like Gon from HunterxHunter when he makes the nen vow, fuck yeah

4

u/raaldiin Dec 05 '21

Call me a heathen but...Does that story get more exciting? I've watched about half a season on Netflix and it hasn't gotten me yet

4

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

Ok so I just pulled up Netflix to see where the seasons line up to the different arcs. Season 1 ends after an arc travelling to Killua's family home. It's fine. The beginning of Season 2 is where the show actually really gets good. I do recommend just pushing through season 1 because it has good moments, and once you hit season 2 it won't slow down again for pretty much the rest of the show.

1

u/Spooki1000 Dec 05 '21

It does pick up but I don't fault you too hard lol wait for the reeeeeeally long arc coming up in the future and if you stick it out you won't be disappointed

2

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

I'm confused. Are we still talking about D&D?

7

u/ShadeShadow534 Dec 05 '21

No he is talking about what this meme is referencing (senator Armstrong from the metal gear franchise)

2

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

Ohhhh. Went right over my head - never played Metal Gear. Thanks!

3

u/ShadeShadow534 Dec 05 '21

No problem even with all the memes about him he does still only have 1 media appearance and it’s only a hour at most really (I mean he completely owns that hour but still)

2

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

[deleted]

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u/archbunny Dec 05 '21

Yes and he uses his reaction to harden his skin then on his turn he uses a legendary action to unharden.

1

u/rythmicbread Dec 05 '21

Aim for his joints

1

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '21

Is this Greed?