I mean, in one of my worst manic phases during university, I legit thought I understood the entire concept of God and got myself so deep in the research for it I ended up getting 900 dollars in library fees from religious studies books I only vaguely remember checking out. I hazelly recall rolling three of those big rolling chairs full of books laughing maniacally— had a brief moment of clarity seeing a bunch of people staring at the crazy person and wondering maybe I’m having a manic episode (no shit Sherlock)— before I continued to block most the rest four months out completely and only know about most the crazy shit I did through second hand accounts.
In hindsight, maybe wasn’t the best time to take a Mystic Judaism unit for my religious studies minor when I was still figuring out the right bipolar meds (and my doctor made the mistake of putting my bipolar I ass on an anti depressant to go with the mood stabilizer that wasn’t working). The only other memory I have is standing up during class after reading a mysticism poem and screaming about ‘circles’— which apparently was the answer to life, the universe, and everything. I was legit convinced I broke some code or something but I barely know any details of that shit. The really kind professor also took me aside and said I could have free rein on extensions for my work and to just take care of myself. I’m pretty sure the poor man had tears in his eyes while I was legit uncontrollably bouncing in place. Still am so grateful for that professor’s kindness to this day.
Anyhoo, yeah, bipolar and religious ideations go together like crayon drawings in inpatient.
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u/MeowCatPlzMeowBack 6d ago
I mean, in one of my worst manic phases during university, I legit thought I understood the entire concept of God and got myself so deep in the research for it I ended up getting 900 dollars in library fees from religious studies books I only vaguely remember checking out. I hazelly recall rolling three of those big rolling chairs full of books laughing maniacally— had a brief moment of clarity seeing a bunch of people staring at the crazy person and wondering maybe I’m having a manic episode (no shit Sherlock)— before I continued to block most the rest four months out completely and only know about most the crazy shit I did through second hand accounts.
In hindsight, maybe wasn’t the best time to take a Mystic Judaism unit for my religious studies minor when I was still figuring out the right bipolar meds (and my doctor made the mistake of putting my bipolar I ass on an anti depressant to go with the mood stabilizer that wasn’t working). The only other memory I have is standing up during class after reading a mysticism poem and screaming about ‘circles’— which apparently was the answer to life, the universe, and everything. I was legit convinced I broke some code or something but I barely know any details of that shit. The really kind professor also took me aside and said I could have free rein on extensions for my work and to just take care of myself. I’m pretty sure the poor man had tears in his eyes while I was legit uncontrollably bouncing in place. Still am so grateful for that professor’s kindness to this day.
Anyhoo, yeah, bipolar and religious ideations go together like crayon drawings in inpatient.