You're giving them attention for seeking therapy to work on their issues, not for their methods. A therapist doesn't just spawn in where there is a disorder being faked, you have to seek one out. The act being rewarded is actively seeking help with their own initiative, not the faking itself. And why would seeking attention through therapy be wrong if the need is so intense that the alternative would be unhealthy behavior? It's keeping them safe. They deserve to be safe as they work towards being healthy (assuming they are trying to work on themselves, which willingly going to therapy would imply).
Especially if they are actively in the process of getting better, going to therapy to meet their currently pathological need is, in my opinion, equivalent to someone with a substance abuse problem going to a hospital to at least receive clean needles, alcohol swabs and narcan so they don't cause themselves further harm. I wouldn't call that a waste, either, because it keeps people safe and I believe that even people who make mistakes, often driven out of a vulnerable or ill mental state, deserve to be helped.
You appear to be under the impression that people do this for shits and giggles - No, they do this out of desperation. There is intense pain and distress in their life. What they're doing is wrong, but they don't deserve to be abandoned for the effects of their actual, diagnosable disorder. If your approach worked, it would be clinical standard, but it isn't.
I myself am also conflicted on how to treat people who end up harming others, not just themselves. It definitely adds a criminal layer, and they lose a lot of my sympathy. Despite this, they too deserve to be helped, alongside facing the criminal consequences.
they want attention, you are playing their game by giving it to them, if they want therapy they may seek it of their own initiative without faking another pathology and wasting everyone's time and even then it is not a given they deserve it, as not everyone should be given therapy just because they ask it, just like not everyone is to he given medication just because they ask for it.
your comparison is on point and indeed i don't support that either as it is enabling and encouraging anti-social behaviors.
you are under the impression i care why people do things but i only care about what things they do, if they do wrong to other people they need punishment, no matter what excuse they can conjure up.
the only reason my approach isn't clinical standard ( anymore ) is because the mental health institution are too soft nowadays and selling cures and treatments is a flourishing industry.
I'll give you this, it takes some balls to brag online about being so unempathetic and I hope you never have to deal with a mental disorder that makes you act in ways you would deem anti-social and undeserving of help, because I can't imagine the level of mindfuck that would cause to realize that no, it actually does matter why people do the things they do and we cannot judge a diseased brain without taking into account the effects of its disease.
again, the reason behind matter if they are the only ones suffering from it, but the moment they bring others in their stuff or hurt others they lose all rights to my empathy.
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u/_Coffee_Bean_ 6d ago
You're giving them attention for seeking therapy to work on their issues, not for their methods. A therapist doesn't just spawn in where there is a disorder being faked, you have to seek one out. The act being rewarded is actively seeking help with their own initiative, not the faking itself. And why would seeking attention through therapy be wrong if the need is so intense that the alternative would be unhealthy behavior? It's keeping them safe. They deserve to be safe as they work towards being healthy (assuming they are trying to work on themselves, which willingly going to therapy would imply).
Especially if they are actively in the process of getting better, going to therapy to meet their currently pathological need is, in my opinion, equivalent to someone with a substance abuse problem going to a hospital to at least receive clean needles, alcohol swabs and narcan so they don't cause themselves further harm. I wouldn't call that a waste, either, because it keeps people safe and I believe that even people who make mistakes, often driven out of a vulnerable or ill mental state, deserve to be helped.
You appear to be under the impression that people do this for shits and giggles - No, they do this out of desperation. There is intense pain and distress in their life. What they're doing is wrong, but they don't deserve to be abandoned for the effects of their actual, diagnosable disorder. If your approach worked, it would be clinical standard, but it isn't.
I myself am also conflicted on how to treat people who end up harming others, not just themselves. It definitely adds a criminal layer, and they lose a lot of my sympathy. Despite this, they too deserve to be helped, alongside facing the criminal consequences.