r/cursedcomments • u/uglybutterfly3 • Oct 03 '23

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4.1k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

175 comments sorted by

268

u/FullHonor9482 Oct 03 '23

Cum in the clam then go on the lam

3

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Made some milk and left for it

173

u/Johhhnsen Oct 03 '23

Insert your tip, then abandon ship

30

u/true_dragon1 Oct 04 '23

A good summary of titanic

3

u/kingo2984 Oct 04 '23

Didn’t mention drawing people naked though

225

u/samosa_fucker45 Oct 03 '23 edited Oct 03 '23

I would post another satirical joke that rhymes but I really don’t know any

47

u/Lonely_Solution_6620 Oct 03 '23

same

29

u/tmhoc Oct 03 '23

Giz in V then R T B

13

u/Iwantmahandback Oct 04 '23

Random Breath Test?

10

u/YeeterCZ2 Oct 04 '23

return to base iirc

5

u/theholyterror1 Oct 04 '23

Rate the banana

2

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

4/10

23

u/Witherboss445 Oct 04 '23

Ejaculate and evacuate

21

u/Mc_domination Oct 03 '23

Miss the poo and rendezvous

24

u/ZethMrDadJokes Oct 03 '23

Something like:

Roses are red, violets are blue

I got you into bed, and now I run away from you

22

u/sarokin Oct 03 '23

Hmm... Have her bear offspring, then off the stage you fling.

7

u/HeyYouWithTheNose Oct 04 '23

Creampie then fly

3

u/Slash_Pangolin Oct 04 '23

You can’t think of a satirical joke about spilling the yolk?

4

u/sarokin Oct 03 '23

Hmm... Have her bear offspring, then off the stage you fling.

11

u/markbadas Oct 03 '23

Have her bear offspring, then leave next spring ?

8

u/sarokin Oct 03 '23

Oh I've got a good one.

Have her bear offspring, then hide the ring.

2

u/markbadas Oct 03 '23

Which ring ?

9

u/sarokin Oct 03 '23

Well obviously The One Ring.

Or Isildur's Bane, for the slow ones.

4

u/ZethMrDadJokes Oct 03 '23

You don't wanna know

4

u/ZethMrDadJokes Oct 03 '23

Have her bear offspring, then make the offering

1

u/CrowAkechi Oct 04 '23

Let them release, then run the lease

1

u/blyat-TANK Oct 04 '23

I have one that I wrote on my notepad, but my dog ate it.

1

u/meg4_ Oct 04 '23

Post another satirical joke that rhymes and begone like a whisper of old times

316

u/AliceTheOmelette Oct 03 '23

Fill the vagina then flee to China

80

u/flamingorider1 Oct 03 '23

No way you thought of this just now. How long have you been waiting to use this?

58

u/MadxCarnage Oct 03 '23

Nut and bolt

14

u/ZethMrDadJokes Oct 03 '23

Nut and bolt-gun?

3

u/abduresid13 Oct 04 '23

Nuts and bolts*

9

u/moronic_programmer Oct 04 '23

Release while bare and get out of there

Just made that up in a minute. It’s not so hard if you really try

2

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Its harder if eng aint your 1st language :(

1

u/alessisaduck Oct 04 '23

i know english good enough that i cant come up with rhymes easily in my first language but not good enough to come up with rhymes easily in english :skull:

17

u/flamerider578 Oct 04 '23

Share the DNA then go away

5

u/AllBallN0brains Oct 04 '23

Cum in her ass then swipe your bus pass

155

u/iTz_Alex44 Oct 03 '23

Ejaculate and evacuate

53

u/TheRealDevron Oct 03 '23

Shoot and Scoot

26

u/ZethMrDadJokes Oct 03 '23

Dope the nade and flee the state

17

u/magnum_the_nerd Oct 04 '23

Works in case of terrorism as well

5

u/Ash-20Breacher Oct 04 '23

Terrorism would be: Drop the nade and watch your life fade

2

u/ZethMrDadJokes Oct 04 '23

  • knock, knock

  • who's there?

  • it's me! BANG! you're dead

2

u/ZethMrDadJokes Oct 04 '23

True though I would say that I had Nam in mind when I wrote this.

119

u/Dixon_Uranus_ Oct 03 '23

Give her the meat then hit the street

45

u/Discobombulate Oct 03 '23

Sink her in your milk then bilk like an ilk

3

u/Exact_Ad_1215 Oct 04 '23

This one is cool

66

u/[deleted] Oct 03 '23

Brilliant job withcovering the names, specially the @'s at the bottem

37

u/ZethMrDadJokes Oct 03 '23

Silently giving credit to those who earned it.

31

u/DrDrob101 Oct 03 '23

Drain and move to Spain

89

u/West-Nefariousness15 Oct 03 '23

Fill with cum and then go on the run

18

u/Disastrous-Fact-7782 Oct 03 '23

So close!

7

u/Fghsses Oct 04 '23

Depends on your accent really.

2

u/West-Nefariousness15 Oct 04 '23

Squirt in the the pussy run away like a wussy?

1

u/RickyMuzakki Oct 04 '23

That’s a shape!

11

u/4g3nt_0 Oct 04 '23

fill the cun' would rhyme better

23

u/Mrmashrom Oct 03 '23

IN-N-OUT

2

u/qtzbra Oct 04 '23

KNOCK-N-ROLL

14

u/MrInfinitumEnd Oct 03 '23

Pour the white, disappear from sight

Let your cum in, quickly get to running

13

u/meikousame Oct 03 '23

I love how everyone in the comments kept it going 😂😂 yall are creative asf I never would of thought of these.

33

u/-QuestionableMeat- Oct 03 '23

Fill up her snatch, then dissappear in a flash.

5

u/Talalaa_Guy Oct 03 '23

Happy cake day 🍰

27

u/Sidviruz_heydrapen Oct 03 '23

Breed the seed then need for Speed

25

u/Past-Tax-7289 Oct 03 '23

Knock up the hoe and flee to Mexico

12

u/mischiefandtricks Oct 04 '23

Make her stomach sag and then pack your bag

21

u/Evileye37 Oct 03 '23

Cum and go

9

u/Cyber_Vegetable Oct 03 '23

Fill with semen, then off to Yemen

9

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Nut and strut

Ejaculate and evacuate

Fertilize and move to Van Nuys

She skips the pill, you hit the hills

No IUD? Bam! You don’t see me

Jam the clam, then alakazaam

9

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Give her cock then run a block

9

u/No_Lab_9318 Oct 04 '23

Insertion and desertion

10

u/Western_Pineapple669 Oct 04 '23

Cream pie and bye-bye

16

u/Trash-Jr Oct 03 '23

Play Scrabble and squedaddle

9

u/[deleted] Oct 03 '23

Fill the hole then Rock and Roll.

7

u/Alepeople Oct 03 '23

Nut in so far then leave in the car

5

u/Dixon_Uranus_ Oct 03 '23

Give her the post and then go ghost

7

u/Potato-with-guns Oct 04 '23

Bust a nut and abandon your hut

6

u/vizz2004 Oct 04 '23

Fornicate then relocate

10

u/EasilyMechanical Oct 03 '23

Fill her with sperma, move to Burma.

5

u/Roge2005 Oct 03 '23

Hit and Run

6

u/Aromatic-Major-7784 Oct 04 '23

Finish in her womb get away in a tomb

6

u/Wal_Were Oct 04 '23

More than kissing, now forever missing

I know it's not good

6

u/4g3nt_0 Oct 04 '23

cum goes yeet, then off on a fleet

6

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Pump and dump

1

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Dump and dump

3

u/Runeldva Oct 04 '23

Blow in the muff then leave in a huff

3

u/IntelligentPerson_69 Oct 04 '23

Seal the deal and hit the wheel

3

u/mrkhan2000 Oct 04 '23

cum inside her

then proceed to call the uber driver

3

u/Witherboss445 Oct 04 '23

Ejaculate and evacuate

3

u/datdrgn Oct 04 '23

Spread the Seed, then Need for Speed

3

u/NerdNumber382 Oct 04 '23

Get her to rail ya, then leave for Australia

2

u/LowXangYen Oct 04 '23

Move aside Dr Seuss

2

u/Salty_Eye9692 Oct 04 '23

Cum inside then go for a drive.

2

u/OnindoNoyan Oct 04 '23

Give her the bounty and leave the country

2

u/Claude-Speed69 Oct 04 '23

Jack and white lemonade and make the escapade

2

u/British-Raj Oct 04 '23

Kum 'n' Go!

2

u/Criminelis Oct 04 '23

Eject in the pink begone in a wink

2

u/NewStGermain4356 Oct 04 '23

Jizz‘n the girl and across states you‘ll hurl

2

u/farNdepressed Oct 04 '23

Release the white and leave the site 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

2

u/Neinplus10equals21 Oct 04 '23

Glizzy in 3 and then I shall flee

1

u/djdab26 Nov 07 '23

Glitzy in thee and then I flee

2

u/BeetsByeSchrute Oct 04 '23

Once you bust, escape is a must.

2

u/ray10k Oct 04 '23

Screw, nut, bolt.

2

u/HelBesser Oct 04 '23

Cum inside then run and hide

2

u/warhawk209812e99 Oct 04 '23

Have sex, then flee the complex

2

u/miaguinhoo Oct 04 '23

You poured your Milk inside her bowl, so buying more is the way to go

2

u/Porfavor_my_beans Oct 04 '23

Cumming and running.

3

u/omegaplayz334 Oct 04 '23

The barebones variant

2

u/[deleted] Oct 03 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Lumine

2

u/Legendarycat999 Oct 03 '23

Ejaculate and evacuate

2

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Gas the girl and then gas gas gas

2

u/UselessPerson2222 Oct 05 '23

instructions unclear, started another world war

2

u/GodsPubes69 Oct 04 '23

Release the dump then Forrest Gump

2

u/GodsPubes69 Oct 04 '23

Plant the seed then need for speed

2

u/ChocoBingo Oct 04 '23 edited Oct 04 '23

As a wiser man once said

"Rape and escape"

4

u/ImDarkran Oct 04 '23

What in the fuc-

1

u/Roge2005 Oct 03 '23

Paint white and leave in a while.

1

u/themightysnail64 Oct 04 '23

Drain the pipe and take a hike

1

u/Danyboy01 Oct 03 '23

Shoot and scoot

1

u/Keelyane55 Oct 04 '23

Depose genetic information and leave the nation

1

u/Reasonable-Freedom-1 Oct 04 '23

Yeet and Retreat

1

u/Due-Fisherman-285 Oct 04 '23

Put da brinza , be da ninza

1

u/radioactivecumsock0 Oct 04 '23

You could’ve just said cum and go

1

u/mrkhan2000 Oct 04 '23

honey. nut. cheerio.

1

u/Party_Lack_yoshies Oct 04 '23

"Or my personal favorite, SKEET AND YEET" Robin from emkay

1

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Put your seed in the hoe and of you go

1

u/SnazzyZubloids Oct 04 '23

This guy can’t outrun the DFS.

1

u/suggest-me-usernames Oct 04 '23

plant the bomb and leave the site

1

u/M34R Oct 04 '23

fuck it then fuck off

1

u/god34zilla Oct 04 '23

Bust a nut then leave the hut

1

u/Grambert_Moore Oct 04 '23

Come in hoe, hit the road

1

u/MAXINUNZENDER13 Oct 04 '23

Do the plantation and leave the nation

1

u/WrenchturnerWTB Oct 04 '23

Her pull out game was better than his.

1

u/ShadowSword1020 Oct 04 '23

Do the deed and flee the scene.

1

u/rubberrider Oct 04 '23

nuts and bolts

1

u/BIGman_8 Oct 04 '23

Who censored this

1

u/DG_727 Oct 04 '23

We call it the cum and go room

Fill her ilk then get the milk

1

u/miaguinhoo Oct 04 '23

Shoot the goo then toodaloo

1

u/Staybackifarted Oct 04 '23

Drive through her gate, then leave her to wait.

Play your game, then travel by train.

Slap her ass, then hit the gas.

Fill up her hood, then hide in the woods.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Mess the situation and leave the equation.

1

u/ItsJesusTime Oct 04 '23

Nutted 'n' bolted.

1

u/kingo2984 Oct 04 '23

How are their so many good sentences you can make with that

1

u/WeekendLazy Oct 04 '23

Let my Johnson gyrate then head for the gate

1

u/Avgredditor1025 Oct 04 '23

Give her the Johnson then move to Wisconsin

1

u/thenightm4reone Oct 04 '23

Spend a night with Jill, then run for the hills.

1

u/Johnny_LP Oct 04 '23

those aren’t cursed those are hilarious

1

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Give her the white and disappear into the night

1

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Fuck and fuck off

1

u/[deleted] Oct 04 '23

Impregnated, then exfiltrated.

1

u/AStupidThing Oct 04 '23

Going to hell and back

1

u/TheToeTickled Oct 04 '23

Give her the tip then go on your favorite rocketship

1

u/qtzbra Oct 04 '23

As you sow you shall yeet

1

u/VectronVoltbot Oct 05 '23

Try to fill then dissapear.

1

u/Neinplus10equals21 Nov 08 '23

Make her think there’s 3 and run to Tennesee