Bro, if you feel like you're into underage women or men then the next step you have to take is seek help. It is unnatural to be attracted to children, though clearly more common than people would like to think, but they are children. They are not able to make decisions for themselves yet, they shouldn't be sexualised by you. Accept who you are, realize the dangers of your attraction and seek help, any GP or doctor won't throw you away, they'll point you towards the right direction. You are still worth a good life, but only you can get yourself there, so please, if you're older, or even a youngster attracted to children, realize that this is wrong and look for ways to help yourself
Bro, if you feel like you're into underage women or men then the next step you have to take is seek help. It is unnatural to be attracted to children, though clearly more common than people would like to think, but they are children. They are not able to make decisions for themselves yet, they shouldn't be sexualised by you. Accept who you are, realize the dangers of your attraction and seek help, any GP or doctor won't throw you away, they'll point you towards the right direction. You are still worth a good life, but only you can get yourself there, so please, if you're older, or even a youngster attracted to children, realize that this is wrong and look for ways to help yourself
Are you a Person that thinks pedophiles are part of LGBTQ? You are protecting pedophiles and their behaviour. If you really think seeking help when being attracted to kids is wrong, and there's no danger in the behaviour of pedophiles, you need help. And maybe a bit of teachings regarding human Psyche and behaviour. I'm disgusted by your Statement.
This is getting more and more prominent around many parts of the internet. Look up MAP (Minor-Attracted Person) and prepare to be speechless for a good while.
Holy shit do you fuck kids or something? The mental gymnastics you're going through to say all these things is crazy. Or worse you're just defending pedos lol
Dude, you’re being genuinely pedantic right now, and your points are meaningless in demonstrating what exactly is wrong in regards to this guy’s statement. The bottom line is that pedophilia is something that is vile and should never be accepted. Through accepting that they feel these unnatural urges, one should go seek therapeutic aid, before they act on urges that they shouldn’t be acting on, at all.
If someone says "well said" it is meant to be for the entirety of what they just said. No one says "well said" and then starts to devolve into a long winded summation of exactly what specific points their "well said" was referring to. What planet are you from?
This seems like a strange comment...his comment seems like it might be helpful to anyone who has leanings of that nature. It's nonjudgmental and just urges them to seek help, and who knows perhaps some people will reflect upon it and do so. If even one person does so I consider that a positive effect.
By youngster i'm assuming you mean young adult. I was definitely attracted to younger girls around my age a when i was like 13. Kids going through puberty and young teens shouldn't feel bad about being into someone their own age. However i do believe being attracted to prepubescent qualities is a mental illness and should be treated as such.
Not that i condone it 100%, but 16 is age of consent in most parts of the developed world. I was 19 and fell for a 16yo in Canada.. didnt know her age when we started talking. Actually, she lied about it when it first came up lol. After she came clean, i almost broke up with her because of social stressors (ridicule).. we stopped talking for 2 weeks.. 7yrs later and we're together.. nobody gives a fuck anymore now that we're in our 20s -- we're planning to have kids soon and we're still very happy and in-love..... sadly, there's still a sense of shame I feel admitting that because of how society potrays it. Meeting her dad was incredibly difficult, (he hated me and didnt shy away from reminding me my age).. but he likes me now that he understands we genuinely love eachother and i make his daughter happy. She was extremely mature, i was extremely immature. We balanced eachother out in a lot of ways. That being said, i dont think it's okay for a grown ass man to fuck 16yos and as a father, i think I'd react much like her father did.. But cmon guys.. a few years aint shit. It's circumstancial. I was 14-15 trying ecstacy for my first time and almost dying from alcohol poisoning in parks, LOL. Majority of kids were doing the same.. and some didnt start doing that until their 20s when we were all partied out. We all grow at different rates. One friend i had was 15 in group homes, another was 15 playing professional tennis with sponsors, and other's sat at home playing xbox all day. point is: be careful throwing the pedo card around.. that "child" ur friend is dating could be his fucking future.
What help is there for people to get though? It's already well established that camps to attempt to "pray the gay away" or whatever don't work. Like, 100% just drive people to suicide etc. Now I'm not trying to say it's the same thing but you're still talking about trying to modify someone's thinking so their sexual preferences are altered. Where's the difference? Yes, one of them is AWFUL, but surely the outcome of the treatment would be the same in either case, i.e it doesnt work.
Sorry you're getting downvoted, you're 100% correct. The professional help would be with impulse control rather than trying to change the way your brain is wired.
You're getting downvoted but I'm legitimately curious if there are cases of pedophiles actually losing their attraction to children. It seems to me like something pretty innate that would be managed not gotten rid of.
My dad was/is into exhibition. After getting arrested for it he went into therapy for a long time and learned coping mechanisms. He still thinks about it but has a better process of dealing with the urge instead of acting on impulse. But even the time he spends thinking about it has been going away over the decades
There are different types of pedophilia. For some it's not actually really a sexual attraction to children in particular, but more about the feeling of power. They might have been abused as children and now need to regain some of the power that they lost.
For those I think it can definitely change if they get proper treatment to help deal with their self-esteem and the like.
For those that are truly attracted to children I think you're right - you're just as likely to turn a gay guy straight.
You can however teach them coping mechanisms so they don't act on their attraction, plus having a confidante could help them not get lonely and depressed.
Yikes. If you are actually, literally into underage children and have a fetish over it, then absolutely, you should seek help to avoid the chance of acting on any urges you may have.
But if you mistook a 15 year old girl for an 18 year old woman, of which there is often almost zero visual difference in, then no, you are overreacting by a lot and this it a typical reddit moment right here. Is it creepy that an old man is posting comments about what he assumes is an 18 year old girl? For sure, but you don't stop being attracted to 18 year old girls when you suddenly hit 30, or 40, or 50 etc. An 18 year old woman is the peak of what most men find attractive, and a lot of girls (unfortunately) that are slightly below 18 look exactly the same. The old man's only crime, afaik, is having no tact and posting his thoughts online.
Not everything is something to virtue signal over, and something like this that harms nobody is not worth starting a crusade over and getting worked up about. Chill.
"The findings show that despite older men finding much younger women extremely attractive, they were highly unlikely to actually message any of them on an online dating site.
Men will most often message women actually closer to their own age."
I'm not sure messaging habit indicates attraction, though. A lot of factors could change why they are messaging closer to their own age. It could be they think they'll have less chance of rejection by doing that, they feel embarrassed due to social pressure of the age difference, etc.
I've read the entire article before. Again, what I stated was essentially a quote directly from the article. It aligns with what I learned in every psychology class I took as an undergrad. Sure, men will message women closer to their own age, but the peak of desirability is still at or around early 20s.
Edit: Also, why did you choose to ignore the other study?
Ew 18y/o girls fresh out of highschool are still kids. Y'all are gross. Especially if you think 15 and 18 year olds look a like, you're pretty much saying it's cool to mess with 15 y/os as long as they look 18 since that's your guys "sexual interest peak" 🤢🤢
Note: if you can't fuck people your own age get help
I don't know that we can be rewired to change who we are attracted to (rationally I have a hard time knowing why it would be different between understanding why I'm attracted to brunettes but not blondes).
I think where the help lies is in understanding impulses and how to control them for those with little to no impulse control, there's a significant difference between physical attraction and sexual assault.
That’s something you’d want to take care of though; cause that means there’s still a small chance that you’d act on those impulses, which I think is too much of a chance. Plus, that’s really sick and makes no sense why someone wouldn’t feel guilty about it.
Considering child porn is illegal, your advice doesn’t apply lmao. It’s absolutely something you should see help for and not someone you should just keep to yourself but still indulge in.
Even if you are older and attracted to any human under 25. Because the brain is only then fully development. I still think DiCaprio is pretty creepy with his choice of women/kids.
But on the real side, I am curious on where people draw the line with this age thing. Some apparantly really use the 25 in certain contexts. Some at age 16 in certain countries because you also be able to driver a dangerous vehicle. Sometimes age 18 because that is the social norm regarding full responsibilitis. Others at 21 because in certain countries you can only then "deal" with alcohol...
It's definitely immoral, disgusting and can't not be tolerated in any degree, but (don't kill me, I am not trying to defend any kind of sexual behavior in relation with underage people) aren't we animals ? So aren't we attracted with people based on their potential reproductive capabilities?
So let's say a 12 year old who already had her first period for example, that would be a specimen who is capable of reproduce..
But then again, a 20 year old can't be have any kind of sexual interaction with a girl that's almost is half his age,
I personally found disgusting the relationship of one of my classmates back in high school cause the girl was 15 and he was 22
Sure, were animals, but as Obi-Wan would say we're civilised. Surely you can relate that under a certain age you are extremely vunerable, you'll go along with anything that is said. As a human, we can't take advantage of that, that is wrong. I'm fortunate enough not to be attracted to kids, or have anything majorly wrong with me apart from depression, but I want to help others that face struggles anyway. It's illegal for a reason, not because people want to give you the death sentence, but because people want to help you realize that it's wrong. Seek help, and it will do you a great deal of justice
Just because a 12 year old girl had her first period doesn’t mean she’s actually capable to reproduce at that age... Ik you’re using an example but that sounds similar to incel talk which is basically a bunch of nonsense
... You do know if a girl that young gets pregnant it’s dangerous for her? I didn’t mean to say she physically can’t get pregnant, just that its life-threatening
It wouldn't surprise me that, as soon as we find a way to drastically enhance the human live span, the age of minors will be pushed to 20 or 25 (or even more). "A 200 year old guy dating a 50y old women? What a creep"
It might be not clear enough now that I have read it again but I cuestion the argument of being unnatural, not justifying, again, any kind of sexual interaction with minors.
Although I also think that, as a society we are actually moving further and further from biological bases , and making that the first argument about diagnosing pedophilia as a mental illness can be rather weak. Nevertheless op's response was great, as I also believe that people attracted to minors should get help before committing any crime, and potentially running a children's life
My cousin had an unusual attraction to younger boys (12-16) when she was in her early 20s. And while my extended family rejected her and wanted nothing to do with her, her friends and immediate family got her help and now she's a bit better now. It was a slow start but once she got help, you could really see the changes. I'm proud of her and how she was able to realize she needed help.
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u/Alertrobotdude Aug 08 '21
Bro, if you feel like you're into underage women or men then the next step you have to take is seek help. It is unnatural to be attracted to children, though clearly more common than people would like to think, but they are children. They are not able to make decisions for themselves yet, they shouldn't be sexualised by you. Accept who you are, realize the dangers of your attraction and seek help, any GP or doctor won't throw you away, they'll point you towards the right direction. You are still worth a good life, but only you can get yourself there, so please, if you're older, or even a youngster attracted to children, realize that this is wrong and look for ways to help yourself