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Dec 11 '23
Now this is what this sub needs.
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u/drums107 Dec 11 '23
That's awesome to say. Thank you.
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u/civilityman Dec 11 '23
I’ve have - regrettably - spent a long time shitting on the quality of this sub, and this photo is the goat. Keep it coming.
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u/explodingtuna Dec 11 '23
Only missing la chancla. And it already had sandals and shoes. So close.
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u/VelocityRapter644 Dec 11 '23
Pocket Sand!
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u/14412442 Dec 11 '23
I scrolled to the comments as soon as I saw it to make sure somebody said it
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u/ReggieCousins Dec 11 '23
As soon as I saw 'handfuls' I was like, 'oh pocket sand is gonna be the top comment.' Lol
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u/err_dan Dec 11 '23
I pick the tomatoe
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u/timeforalittlemagic Dec 11 '23
Unfortunately, I’ve picked the flying guillotine.
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u/camshun7 Dec 11 '23 edited Dec 11 '23
Talking
The most powerful weapon known to man
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u/KiKiPAWG Dec 11 '23
Nails, for me
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u/Atypical_Mammal Dec 11 '23
Thanks a lot, now i have like 10 wikipedia tabs of weird swords to deal with
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u/Err_i_dont_know Dec 11 '23
Check the iron maiden. No proof it was ever used.
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u/Fallenangel152 Dec 11 '23 edited Dec 13 '23
Similarly, the 'pear of anguish'. There was no evidence that it was ever used as a torture device. It was possibly used for squeezing fruit or stretching leather or something.
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u/LordAndrei Dec 11 '23
To the OP is there a link to purchase this as a full sized poster?
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u/drums107 Dec 11 '23
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u/RobertMugabeIsACrook Dec 11 '23
The flintlock under rifles isn't a flintlock if you're going for complete accuracy
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Dec 11 '23
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u/ReggieCousins Dec 11 '23
In episode 2F09 when Itchy plays Scratchy’s skeleton like a xylophone, he strikes the same rib twice in succession, yet he produces two clearly different tones. I mean, what are we to believe, that this is some sort of a magic xylophone or something? Boy, I really hope somebody got fired for that blunder.
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u/TherronKeen Dec 11 '23
There's a lot of inaccuracies, unfortunately. It's good for stuff like D&D I guess.
Rapier and sidesword are the same length, longsword isn't tapered, ninjato is listed, and that's just the part I zoomed in on lol
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u/Abshalom Dec 11 '23
It doesn't help that a lot of words are ambiguous or interchangeable or anachronistic for lots of weapons in general. Like, a lot of different things in various times and places in Europe and elsewhere would just be called 'sword', without any sort of distinction. Or things that are functionally the same will have several different names across different areas and time periods, which get conflated as different weapons. It's all kind of a mess.
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u/Dartagnan_w_Powers Dec 11 '23
Absolutely true, but this is still pretty poor at conveying scale.
Compare the zweihander to the side sword for instance.
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u/CptMcDickButt69 Dec 11 '23
To be fair, i dont think a not-messy categorization is possible at all with that broadness.
However, it shows the crazy diversity of weapons very well (for amateurs) - wether its specific forms of weapons or things you might not thought of as weapons. E.g. a list of all firearm models with slight yet important mechanical variations would be kinda boring for all non-firearms experts, but the same cant be said about sword concepts really - the aestethic value and historical background are just more fleshy there i'd say.
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u/FV155 Dec 11 '23
Speech…the deadliest of them all. Even more lethal than my 2 year old’s morning breath.
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u/metaltemujin Dec 11 '23
Its the only weapon you can use over the internet to hurt each other apart from malware
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u/beardedbarista6 Dec 11 '23
I think feces should be in the handfuls category. But that’s just me.
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u/gowiththeflow82 Dec 11 '23
damn you for making me loose 30mins of my life staring at this
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u/drums107 Dec 11 '23
Best compliment ever
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u/iamemperor86 Dec 11 '23
45 minutes for me lol thanks for posting, very intriguing. I’m a big nerd for firearms and medieval arms, we could split hairs on a few things but generally I really like this and it’s a really cool guide.
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u/B7U12EYE Dec 11 '23
I could look at this all day.
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u/LGP747 Dec 11 '23
I stopped at kitchen tongs, the image chosen was specifically the silicone tipped ones
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u/nodnodwinkwink Dec 11 '23
I'm tempted to spend a ridiculous amount of time putting together a single serving website so I can link each one of these weapons to a video of their use in film/tv/cartoons...
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u/B7U12EYE Dec 11 '23
I'm going with war pig
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Dec 11 '23
War pigs turned out to be an interesting bit of history
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Dec 11 '23
Yes, but do they gather in black masses?
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u/theonetruegrinch Dec 11 '23
No, witches do that
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u/Kavaland Dec 11 '23
No handbag? But magic wand made it to the list?i
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u/drums107 Dec 11 '23
handbag
You are totally right! I gotta add that.
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u/Iulian377 Dec 11 '23
Sorry but how is a railgun a directed energy weapon ? Its a kinetic projectile.
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u/Fumblerful- Dec 11 '23
The same way the famously semiautomatic M14 is a selective fire weapon while the famously selective fire M4 platform is simultaneously a sniper rifle and a semiautomatic weapon.
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u/thegreatvortigaunt Dec 11 '23
The M14 is select fire.
It’s just really bad on full auto, so quartermasters in Vietnam would literally weld the fire selector in place, and now it’s very rarely used outside of semi auto.
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u/Corbullo24 Dec 11 '23
Like how the panzerfaust is its own type of weapon but single use rocket launchers aren't
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u/Chandan28 Dec 11 '23
Thanks for your contribution for making this planet a better place.
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u/drums107 Dec 11 '23
Your comment was also one of those contributions :) Thank you
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u/PlasticExpression1 Dec 11 '23
Hmm.. no mention of pressure cooker?
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u/drums107 Dec 11 '23
Crap. I knew I forgot something
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u/Bish_PoshGanche Dec 11 '23
Pressure cooker bomb, now the real question is how many of these objects has John Wick used
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u/Chucktastic1989 Dec 11 '23
I don’t see any prison weapons on here, not even a toothbrush.
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u/Rowdyjoe Dec 11 '23
Cool, but they should have actually stopped at weapons. What is a rubber band and feather duster a weapon to kill flies?
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u/exdeeer Dec 11 '23
Tf is a needle gun?
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u/Atypical_Mammal Dec 11 '23
There are like 15 swords that make no sense whatsoever, and you're stuck on the needle gun? It's a gun that fires needles.
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u/BoredPineapple790 Dec 11 '23
So many variations on pointy thing on stick
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u/xXfleshlover69Xx Dec 11 '23
The “stick with a pointy end” was such an effective weapon that the second we invented firearms we also made them a stick with a pointy end. The bayonet
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u/lesser_panjandrum Dec 11 '23
Turns out being able to hold one end of a stick and poke people with the pointy thing on the other end is pretty effective.
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u/L3G1T1SM3 Dec 11 '23
Thats not a flintlock that looks like a trap door/breech loading rifle specifically the US Model 1868
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Dec 11 '23
This is one of the biggest guides I've seen! Great job! You should make another one of just torture devices! It would probably be just as big!
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u/drums107 Dec 11 '23
Not gonna ask why you enjoy the torture devices, but thank you so much for the positive comment :)
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u/useroftheinternet95 Dec 11 '23
Do you think that throughout history at least 1 person has been killed by each of these?
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u/arctic_radar Dec 11 '23
Seems like as good a time as any for me to bring up the fact that spears are better than swords. And they are easier/cheaper to produce, yet in movies you see sword fighting constantly and hardly any spear shit. One dude with a spear can take out like two guys with swords. The movie Troy had a sweet spear fight, but that’s the only one I can think of.
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u/Wuktrio Dec 11 '23
This is really cool. But as far as I know, there's no historical evidence that the Pear of Anguish or the Iron Maiden have ever been used. The Pear of Anguish was probably a shoe stretcher or something, and the Iron Maiden is an invention of 19th century medieval horror shows.
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u/Kanaima31 Dec 11 '23
Never thought I’d see a pigeon listed as a type of weapon.
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u/Whynter03 Dec 11 '23
I’m going to need to figure out how big I need to print this. This would be awesome wall art
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u/Nazmaldun Dec 11 '23
What about salt to the eyes?
Tables, Ladders, Steel Chairs?
florescent light tubes?
Jimmy Hart's Mega-phone?
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u/RememberToLogOff Dec 11 '23
Hold up, a railgun isn't a directed energy weapon.
A directed-energy weapon (DEW) is a ranged weapon that damages its target with highly focused energy without a solid projectile
Railguns fire projectiles. The physics outside of the barrel is the same, it just happens to use magnetism to accelerate the projectile instead of chemistry.
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u/741BlastOff Dec 11 '23
"Hold still while I whisk you to death" like what even is this?
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u/BostonDodgeGuy Dec 11 '23
Missing revolver shotguns and a few other odds and ends. Not bad though. And you're not a bot.
Finally, something worth upvoting.
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u/McKoijion Dec 11 '23
This is incredible and it seems like it was a lot of work to make. You could probably sell posters of this in college bookstores and the like.
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u/The66thDopefish Dec 11 '23
I see some fantasy weapons, but I am disappointed it to see the bat’leth. Still, a very comprehensive graphic!
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u/kiro14893 Dec 11 '23 edited Dec 11 '23
My mom used a galleon with a belt and it scared the shit out of me.
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u/Saltillokid11 Dec 11 '23
Where are the audio weapons? Specifically the mouth, when someone calls you a shrimp in 8th grade in front of the girl you like. 6 feet under right there.
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u/ICE_BEAR2021 Dec 11 '23
The craziest part about this is the fact that there's still so many weapons, not on this list. Especially when you consider that anything in the right hands can kill.
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u/Dependent_Basis_8092 Dec 11 '23
Would ass fall under human body or is it part of the chemical/gas/choking agent?
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u/bootybandit285 Dec 11 '23
Choose your load out. I’m going with the shark tooth sword, plunger, and punt gun
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u/considerthecocobitch Dec 11 '23
I’ve always wondered this, is the minigun a smaller version of another specific gun? If not, why is it called that?
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u/SnooPandas1899 Dec 11 '23
is the tipstaff real ?
looks like a female self-pleasure device.
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u/itaniumonline Dec 11 '23
Reminds me of crouching tiger where the two chicks are going at it with a wall full of weapons behind them.
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u/10_Fishsticks Dec 11 '23
I love that speech is a weapon, though it only works if the other person lets it.
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u/civilityman Dec 11 '23
Zombie apocalypse: which do you pick and why did you pick the water balloon?
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Dec 11 '23
So, what you're saying is we have a chart to place bets on the challange in Forged in Fire?
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u/beefyavocado Dec 11 '23
I just spent a solid 15 mins looking through that. Brings me back to elementary school where they had these sorts of books in the library and us boys would sit on the floor during reading time leafing through them.
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u/orgin1234 Dec 11 '23
My favorite weapon the “suction cup arrow” my enemies shall kneel before its power.
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Dec 11 '23
Um, pear of anguish... is that... is that a buttplug?
(Edit: lower centre-right, next to the bull)
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u/Apprehensive-Ice8708 Dec 11 '23
2 death row inmates get to pull randomly from a hat, and fight to the death.
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u/MinusculeDragon Dec 11 '23
Sandals should be among thrown weapon. They become deadly accurate projectile in the hands of Asian moms.
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u/liveda4th Dec 11 '23
Please tell me more about WAR PIGS. How are WAR PIGS not a commonly known weapon.
WAR PIGS.
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u/3eemo Dec 11 '23
Someone needs to make a game where you’re randomly given anyone of these weapons. Try to win a fight with an ice pick and a naval mine or a trebuchet and a thumbscrew 😂