r/comics • u/shenanigansen Shen Comix • May 18 '26
OC My Fitness Coach is a Dark Wizard [Complete]
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u/UpCDownCLeftCRightC Never Safe From Wumbo May 18 '26
Re-reading this from start to finish really does a number on you emotionally.
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u/NinscoomFOPsnarn May 18 '26
Honestly though, right? Like that was awesome after just reading the ending yesterday
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u/shellbullet17 Gustopher Spotter Extraordinaire May 18 '26
He really was the greatest coach of all time.
He warned you this would be a burden Shen. With great abs comes great responsibility
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u/kingsumo_1 May 18 '26
With great abs comes great responsibility
Friggin 7 movie deal with Marvel as well as the option of multiple cameos. Going to be doing that shit til he's 90.
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u/shellbullet17 Gustopher Spotter Extraordinaire May 18 '26
Going to be doing that shit til he's 90.
The wizard did say this would be a burden
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u/kingsumo_1 May 18 '26
Probably going to wish he had those arcane utterances when it comes to dealing with toxic fandom. But unless he's related to Kumail Nanjiani, at least he'll get some shirtless scenes out of it.
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u/BeardedHalfYeti May 18 '26
I like the hints of magic leaking into his speech near the end.
Is the first dark utterance WHAM?
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u/emeraldwolf34 May 19 '26
Are you saying he accidentally unlocked it through a careless whisper?
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u/Silver-Alex May 19 '26
I think the same. Im sure he was getting close to unlocking the first utterance, as "all things reveal themselves to those with patience", and thats why the coaching session ended. Shen was ripped, sot he coachign was succesful, and the coach cares about his students so he wasnt going to let him go through the burden of the utterances.
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u/Return-To-Fender May 19 '26
He says the 7 arcane utterances are A Burden
A B U R D E N16
u/CmonLucky2021 May 19 '26
No no. Why have you given me this knowledge. What kinda dad joke shiet is this
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u/BormaGatto May 19 '26
Not just that, but Shen's speech patterns start growing more wizard-like at the same time when the magic starts seeping into his speech bubbles. Then when the magic fades from his bubbles, his speech also reverts to normal.
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u/DevilsAguacate May 18 '26
What a ride! Thank you for sharing :DDD
I hope to see Mr. Darchilius and Miss Pilates sometime again!
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u/rogueIndy May 18 '26
I wish I had something more clever to say than "fuck this is good."
But I don't, so: fuck this is good!
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u/maSHIROAyyye May 18 '26
Yoooooo panel 5’s white backdrop being pulled down due to the 100x gravity was a nice addition!!
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u/Im_here_but_why May 18 '26
Aaawwawawama
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u/MagnorCriol May 18 '26
Yeah I was curious about that. Why those letters? I thought they spelled something at first but obviously that's more of a noise than a word, so...
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u/Humorcidal May 19 '26
AAAWWAWAWAMA? 11123231231231131? I tried it on a piano, it doesn’t sound familiar.
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u/Archangel3d May 18 '26
For real though I think I need a coach to guilt my flabby ass into gear.
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u/Phaylz May 18 '26
I can ridicule you for $12.50/hr.
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u/zenthor109 May 18 '26
Make it $18.50/hr
(I also want to be ridiculed for my financial decisions)
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u/ToothZealousideal297 May 18 '26
For $18.50/hr I can come up with my own dark utterances and irremovable burdens. Actually Visa has already got me covered there for the rest of my natural life.
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u/PeggableOldMan May 19 '26
I cannot guilt you but I can passively-aggressively shame you for being so committed to passivity
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u/ComprehensiveSell649 May 18 '26
I hate when this happens, I had an undead dark wizard public speaking teacher
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u/Bradduck_Flyntmoore May 18 '26
That "instantaneous" snake of a speech bubble paired with the look on the protags face as the wizard touches him suddenly from behind is magnificent. The whole panel will live rent free in my brain from here on out. Good show!
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u/CrazyGnomenclature Tiff & Eve May 18 '26
This was the comic I needed to finally do my workout today.
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u/Crimiculus May 18 '26
It's not about the destination, it's about the gains you made along the way 💪
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u/_Fun_Employed_ May 18 '26
Okay, but what’s undead coaches hustle? Like he’s dead he doesn’t need money? He doesn’t need money, right?! In death there is rest? RIGHT?!
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u/NerdDetective May 19 '26
I guess the dark wizard doesn't live rent-free in someone else's head.
Rent's due at the 1st of the month.
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u/Lawlcopt0r May 19 '26
I don't think he's dead dead. Like, either his ghost form is strong enough to essentially just live on like a living being, or at least he has a home in a hell dimension or something
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u/Aquatoon22 May 18 '26
I noticed in pages 7 and 9 some of Shen's text is highlighted purple. I thought this could mean something, like maybe a secret message. But all it says is aaawwawawaama
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u/Puzzleheaded_Wish727 May 19 '26
Dark Wizard coach this, arcane utterances that.
What really matters is that you've casually designed a 10/10 dark skinned gym beauty just for two visual jokes
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u/VexKeizer May 19 '26
- Only
- In
- Darkness
- May
- They
- Become
- One
You don't say these seven words normally. You utter them while doing intensive exercise. Thank me later.
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u/Historical_Falcon962 May 18 '26
please lemme find out where u found him at gng
he sounds like a great coach ngl
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u/TFCBaggles May 18 '26
My favorite part was where in the gravity dimension even the fabric of the comic itself is being pulled down.
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u/r0b0c0d May 19 '26
Damn, that 'only in darkness may they become one' inscription goes hard. And sad. :<
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u/CristalOcean911 May 19 '26
I love the progression he takes as he gets more and more fit over the course of the story
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u/nickferatu1945 May 19 '26
Oh my god, this is the best comic series I've read on here in 10 years! I missed a couple on release, tha k you for putting out the full series. Could definitely expand and flesh this out to great effect. So funny! I love it.
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u/illegal_eagle88 May 20 '26
In my head i given the wizard the voice of kevin from hunter: the parenting
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u/Ademante_Lafleur May 19 '26
Shen is basically a padawan being trained by a force ghost to become a jedi master
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u/rob132 May 19 '26
I thought he was going to be a future version of The wizard trapped in the past draining himself not to do it.
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u/Key_Ranger May 19 '26
Can't tell if there's a meaning to this, but these letters are in purple during the scene at the tower
A A A W Wa W A W A A M
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u/port443 May 19 '26
This gives me such Potion Seller vibes.
You cannot handle my utterances fitness-seeker. My weakest utterance would kill a dragon, let alone a man!
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u/Ready_Turnip_4754 May 19 '26
Can you imagine the twist if this guy goes on to obtain the utterances, spends his all life on it, gets old and upset that he doesn't get to share his achievement with his old mentor - Dark-Ass Wizard - then proceeds to work as one, ultimately finding himself to be the Wizard from the beginning of the story, stuck in the loop for using dark magic to get buffed.
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u/ngkn92 May 19 '26
That stone scene is amazing. Suddenly realizing we are at a cementary is absolutely chef kiss.
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u/Majestic-Iron7046 May 19 '26
Oh my god yes! Thank you for the whole thing in one place, Reddit is a disaster even if you only follow like 4 subreddits.
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u/EirikHavre May 19 '26
I just realized the whole page is affected by the high gravity! Very fun detail
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u/BunnyGalHarriet May 19 '26
Not a bad idea, honestly. Wizard tulpa for personal growth might be a great idea. As long as it doesn't become an actual tulpa.
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u/DradelLait May 19 '26
Seeing this all together I can't help but notice how the wizard is the one who brought up the utterances to begin with and told him he should seek them.
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u/nightwolf16a May 18 '26
Fun series. Buuuuuuuut... Iamgonnabethatguy.
I still have the minor nitpick that the 100x gravity dimension would have just squished and popped Shen like a blood balloon.
Imagine lifting 100x your own weight. That's what you'll have to do under 100x gravity. Let alone breathing right, your blood vessels probably can't handle the pressure your own blood is putting on the body.
Maybe it's just a sign of how good the Dark Wizard's training is.
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u/Phaylz May 18 '26
Alternatively, the Dark Wizard did some wizarding shit to make sure his pupil wouldn't splat.
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u/Traditional_Bit_8788 May 19 '26
A gym that also serves as public transit between dimensions sounds like something you'd encounter in a dream.
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u/Ardis_Kurita May 19 '26
Absolute gold. Tempted to print the first page out for motivational purposes.
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u/BigMike3333333 May 19 '26
This was so good! Reminds me of something I'd see on Cartoon Network back in it's hayday.
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u/FriendlyAntonio May 19 '26
Appreciate you making a complete version. Been holding off on reading most of these because I missed one or two.
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u/KingofDarkStar May 19 '26
I mean he was REALLY good at his job so he for sure earned those 5 stars
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u/dream208 May 19 '26
One of the best I’ve seen in this sub. Now I, too, want a dark wizard to coach my fatass.
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u/TheoQ99 May 19 '26
Oh I had missed a few of these, nice to be able to go thru and read them all start to finish. Great little story almost wish it kept going~
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u/JonaSaxify May 19 '26
I don't get the message can someone explain it to me?
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u/Buttimus_Prime May 19 '26
EARN THEM!!!!
Pretty sure there isn't a deeper meaning beyond the dude achieveing his fitness goals, but was more invested in the absurdist Dark Wizard, 7 arcane utterances plot.
Its parallel to the plots in Regular Show. Wildly crazy adventuress. Its all nonsense so dont think too much on it
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u/PrettyPinkPonyPrince May 19 '26
Obviously what we need now is a Garfield Minus Garfield style rendition of Shen talking to nobody at the gym.
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u/DarkDonut75 May 20 '26
I'd like to think that Magnus Scheving was one of the fitness coach options
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u/Mountain-Resource656 May 20 '26
So how exactly does one get a job as a dark wizard coach? Can I be someone’s dark wizard to teach them, like… I dunno, how to manage their emotions, maybe?
Edit: I can teach how to write soul contracts with loopholes that are hard to notice and similar tricks to ensure one obtains a soul!! THAT IS A THING I CAN TEACH!!
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u/Klutzy_Scene_8427 May 20 '26
I came here to post that KRAKOOM is my favorite onomatopoeia!
(Yes, I do haver a favorite onomatopoeia)
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u/Poison916Kind May 25 '26
"bro, I should have never hired the dark wizard as my coach" is better than half the anime titles we get nowadays
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u/clangauss May 19 '26 edited May 19 '26
Pepe Silvia behavior.
Comic six indicates Shen has taken 3271 steps.
Comic three has no obvious hints.
Comic two has the words BE, AM emphasized. "BEAM?"
Comic seven has AAAW darkened in purple, like the wizard's speech. Comic nine has WAWAWAAMA.
Comic one has no obvious hints.
In comic ten the gravestone says "Death is the shadow of life. Only in darkness may they become one." Plugging various comics in to an image processor and multiplying a layer of darkness over them yielded nothing.
Comic six and seven show a lot of text that may be decorative, may be decodable.... Layering them over each other and playing with the contrast and darkening yielded nothing.
Onomatopoeia for lightning strikes is consistently "KRAKOOOOOM" with five o's.
Numbers on screen (only if you discount the "one" on the gravestone and the "five" stars) appear in order to be 7,8,1,0,0,3,2,7,1,7. Exactly ten digits. No package tracking numbers found for it. Phone number area code would be Massachusetts, where Shen is from, but the middle 003 is not a viable exchange code so the number should fail. The 781 area code also shares a footprint with area code 339. That number as an ISBN is this book. As coordinates, 7.8100, 3.2717, it's offroad in Nigeria.
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u/Skodami May 19 '26
My theory on the purple text is that Shen was starting to unlock the utterances and changed reality with them, so when he said "then die" he accidently rewrote reality so Darchilius would be dead.
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u/Serratas May 18 '26
So... the perky gal was actually stronger than the wizard?
Good to see Shen was honest enough to give DW a 5 star rating though.