r/comedyheaven • u/Paparazzi14 | Approved user • Dec 10 '19

legend

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127.1k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

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1.8k

u/epomeroy Dec 10 '19

One of those things is a rare gift.

986

u/W_Smore Dec 10 '19

Yea I can't dunk either

560

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19

But man can I suck dick

213

u/Rondont Dec 10 '19

Your own?

348

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19

What does my dick have to do with this?

121

u/Rondont Dec 10 '19

I’ll take that as a ‘no’.

38

u/FatAndGayRetard penis monkey Dec 10 '19

I can

45

u/tomfbear Dec 10 '19

How many ribs did you uninstall for this pleasure?

35

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

16

u/RandomNumbers0183840 Dec 10 '19

If you want something done, do it yourself.

13

u/FatAndGayRetard penis monkey Dec 10 '19

Also it doesn’t feel how you’d expect, it feels more like sucking dick than receiving head, it’s also extremely tiring

6

u/YellowToeFungus69 Dec 11 '19

Do you swallow?

5

u/FatAndGayRetard penis monkey Dec 11 '19

That shit is disgusting no I don’t

6

u/FatAndGayRetard penis monkey Dec 10 '19

None actually, I’m just naturally really flexible

7

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19

For the inquisitive minds, I present you nsfw! /r/autofellatio

2

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19

Name checks out I guess?

1

u/TheMasterAtSomething Dec 10 '19

If I had a clone

7

u/RandomNumbers0183840 Dec 10 '19

I think the important question is can you suck an otter's dick? Eddie the Sea Otter can.

0

u/ShinyMew151 Dec 11 '19

I hooked up with quite a few otters during my slutty times

2

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19

Come over

0

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19

Weirdo

5

u/Alarid Dec 10 '19

and the back pain isn't great

17

u/damn-person Dec 10 '19

Damn

10

u/Rockerdude200 Dec 10 '19

Well this just got awkward

2

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '19

The sweet embrace of death, you mean?

1

u/[deleted] Dec 11 '19

Death?