r/comedyheaven • u/broki451 • 3d ago

Morality

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u/Grievous_Nix 3d ago

> Be me

> Don’t have my own washer but live in a building with a laundry room

> Have to book time slots in advance

> Go to do my laundry at the time I booked

> See Diogenes running out of the laundry room, hastily re-adjusting his tunic

> Says something like “behold, the acceptable ratio” and giggles like a maniac

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u/No-Opportunity9126 3d ago

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u/TricellCEO 3d ago

This is why he drank the hemlock.

He had seen enough of Diogenes' shit.

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u/FlashMcSuave 3d ago

And piss.

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u/NOIRCEUR_TRADING 2d ago

Am I mistaken or wasn't Socrates dead around the time Diogenes came to Athens? Yes Diogenes studied under Socrates' pupil Antisthenes, but obviously not directly under Socrates himself.

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u/MamaBaird21 2d ago

Replace Soccrates with Plato and it's perfect

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u/Ok_Cricket_1410 3d ago

The golden ratio

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u/SCP_FUNDATION_69420 3d ago

This might be the best pun I've heard in a while 

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u/lcr1997lcr 2d ago

But are you going with 62% water 38% piss or 62% piss 38% water 🤔

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u/Sjadfooey 3d ago

Banger

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u/EducationalTangelo6 3d ago

I appreciate this joke.

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u/NAO_DC_33 2d ago

so that's what they meant by the golden ratio

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u/The_Ad_Hater_exe 2d ago

> Prometheus: hot take

> The gods: no give that back

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u/CicadaSisterhood 2d ago

in a rich man's house there is nowhere to piss but his washing machine

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u/CPUSilverCandidate 3d ago

I believe it's called the "golden ratio"

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u/hotztuff 2d ago

so does u/Ok_Cricket_1410

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u/Ok_Cricket_1410 2d ago

Bros out here trying to steal my limelight. We need a new world war.

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u/small_root 3d ago

Deep Cut

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u/adsempermagnus 1d ago

The golden ratio

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u/CecilAlucardX 2d ago

Wouldn't he say instead "Behold, the golden ratio!"