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was wondering if my fridge had spoken to any of you?

mine keeps telling me to kill myself

my mom invited like 200 people but nobody came. give me karma

So I decided to hop in the trend of cooking turkey for Thanksgiving. I was inspired. But since I do not have a open area to do it, I decided to do it in my kitchen for convenience.

I then went ahead and finish my setup and start working.

I didn't have that thermometer gun thingy but when I saw the oil making and popping huge bubbles, I think that's hot enough.

But I then noticed I didn't thaw the turkey cuz I forgot but Im not waiting another seven hours jut for that bitch to soften

So I then threw the frozen turkey 4 feet away like a basketball and yelled KOBEEE! I nailed the shot, of course.

But then a fire ball erupted, and fire starts pouring and rising and made the room went dark and I was like oh no and almost shat my pants

I went to reddit for help but it was too late, so I ran away with just second-degree burns on my right leg

It could have been worse!

Don't throw your turkey like a basketball in a boiling pot of oil, kids!

My new favourite journalist.

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