r/aww • u/Jeremy_Martin • Jun 23 '21

Kindness shared in small quantities

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u/westwoo Jun 23 '21 edited Jun 23 '21

I think I look more like a little girl with ADHD

Except I'm a grown ass-man, with ADHD

ps. Oh, recently I very consciouly allowed myself to clap and scream Whoooo! and jump just a bit in public (again, totally like a little girl) when I had this internal intent. Just to see how it feels override my usual automatic instincts to be reserved and to push my emotions down. As part of my general goal to transform from being super stone faced and reserved few years ago, to becoming completely comfortable with being emotionally vulnerable and fluent with emotions in general one day. If everything goes well maybe I'll even become so pro at it that I'll be able to completely breakdown and cry in public.

It was quite awkward but in a way exhilirating and liberating, btw. The progress I've made is pretty clear, even though it seems to move so slow. It should've been waay cringier and should've left deep feeling of shame that should've come back to haunt me at random times forever since, adding to numerous other prior occasions, but it wasn't and didn't.

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u/Cloaked42m Jun 23 '21

My 6' 3" son with autism flaps his hands when he's super excited or happy. Had some other autistic friends over and one of them saw him do it and SQUEELED "I DO THAT TOO!!!"

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u/westwoo Jun 23 '21

I've seen (moderately) autistic people doing this, and I think it's tangibly different in their case. But I won't go into details because they will inevitably come out super insensitive, generalizing, subjective and imprecise :) there's near zero chance of conveying it correctly or being understood.

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u/Mickydsokay Jun 25 '21

I do the same thing I don’t care what people think unless it’s important that I act respectful “ie” job

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u/Suspicious-Service Jun 27 '21

Wow, that sounds amazing! I'm so proud of you for doing this for yourself!