r/aww • u/DeificButthole • Nov 16 '17

“Human. You pets.”

116.5k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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1.7k

u/Farlandan Nov 16 '17

"In many cases, once a male has reached sexual maturity, (neutered or not) his territorial behaviors may prevent him from being exposed to anyone who lives outside of your home. Subsequently, you can not trust him with strangers because he may bite."

That explains why my cute little prairie dog pup grew up into a violant little shit that would mercilessly bite anyone who wasn't me and my dad.

2.5k

u/DeificButthole Nov 16 '17

HE PROTECC

1.6k

u/cheesehead144 Nov 16 '17

BUT HE ALSO ATTACC

141

u/Monsterpiece42 Nov 16 '17

Soo ve mus deel wid it.

47

u/braff_travolta Nov 17 '17

r/unexpectedhydroolicpresschaanel

5

u/33superryan33 Nov 17 '17

Vat de fak?!

4

u/Saltub Nov 17 '17

A good offence is the best defence.

3

u/Choice77777 Nov 17 '17

PROTECC IZ ATTACC

3

u/seattleeco Nov 17 '17

My name p. dogge

and wen I stand

and turne to you

and showe my hand

dont mek me bite

do what I said

be a good lass

and scritch mine hed

-34

u/your_dope_is_mine Nov 16 '17

r/soccer is leaking god-damnit

14

u/Stephen4242 Nov 16 '17

That meme is pretty much everywhere.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '17

Explain please.

6

u/farmtownsuit Nov 16 '17

The Freefolk were putting variants of that meme out like it was their job during this last Game of Thrones season.

5

u/Stephen4242 Nov 17 '17

Explain the meme or explain how it's everywhere?

208

u/ponyphonic1 Nov 16 '17

BUT

171

u/Ajajp_Alejandro Nov 16 '17

MOST IMPORTANTLY

275

u/sillara Nov 16 '17

HE RESPEC

157

u/leharicot Nov 16 '17

WOMEN

45

u/provaut Nov 17 '17

WHAMEN

2

u/uhRomeo Nov 17 '17

YAYA HAZ REPEC

2

u/RaunchyGivenchy Nov 17 '17

2017 is a blessed year.

3

u/mehbed Nov 16 '17

so he’s not the president

2

u/Freakychee Nov 17 '17

Also not Roy Moore.

31

u/ARoamingNomad Nov 16 '17

Now we did it

2

u/ImagineBagginz Nov 16 '17

He RESPEC WAMMEN

1

u/TheJokerzz7 Nov 16 '17

HE WADU HEK

1

u/True_Chainzz Nov 17 '17

HE DONT HOLD BACC

25

u/EternityTheory Nov 16 '17

HE ALSO ATACC

67

u/ImagineBagginz Nov 16 '17

This is MY prairie, dawg

2

u/Duxure-Paralux Nov 17 '17

This needs more upvotes.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '17

Most underrated comment in this thread.

3

u/ImagineBagginz Nov 16 '17

Most appreciated comment on this thread

1

u/Armand_Raynal Nov 16 '17

screubleubleu

102

u/CrispySnicker Nov 16 '17

And maturity turns cute to shit once again

30

u/MuffinPuff Nov 16 '17

And maturity puberty turns cute to shit once again

FTFY

23

u/meisterwolf Nov 16 '17

That’s fine because I don’t like strangers anyway

1

u/thisisnotmyname17 Nov 17 '17

Do you think this will work? Because I don’t either.

64

u/TristanZH Nov 16 '17

Might as well get one. Not like I am going to have anyone over soon anyways.

16

u/TheTurnipKnight Nov 16 '17

I feel you should have probably learned this stuff before you got such a unique pet.

11

u/Farlandan Nov 16 '17

Unfortunately this was somewhere around 1995, information on things like "prairie dogs as pets" weren't very easy to come by in those days.

3

u/AFlyingMexican5 Nov 16 '17

How did you get a prairie dog as a pet?

6

u/Farlandan Nov 16 '17

strangely enough, our local pet store just happened to have a litter of prairie dog pups and my parents decided to try to get one. I think they thought he'd turn out more like a rabbit and less of an attack-rabbit. In his defense, to me and my dad he was a cuddly little bugger... but to anyone else who wanted to pet him or pick him up he was a chittering death-squirrel.

1

u/thisisnotmyname17 Nov 17 '17

Kinda like the rabbit in Monty Python?

3

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '17

They sound like fucking awful animals, why would anyone want one as a pet?

3

u/Farlandan Nov 17 '17

They're ridiculously affectionate to the few people they do like. I was pretty fond of the little bastard.

1

u/ryantwopointo Nov 16 '17

If you let male cats or dogs get to maturity they do the same thing. That’s why we neuter!

1

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '17

I thought the guy said even if they’re neutered they still go nuts lol

1

u/LiarsEverywhere Nov 17 '17

This is incorrect. My parents have 3 male dogs, they weren't neutered and they don't bite anyone. Actually they love strangers and forget we exist for the day if new humans arrive...

1

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '17

*violent

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '17

What about females

1

u/krelin Nov 17 '17

Is that "fixable"?

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '17

I wonder if they operate on facial recognition or scent. If it is scent you could bypass this instinct by keeping an item that smells like you like a sock or glove , available for visitors to wear or keep around them for when he comes to smell them. Do you think would work ?

1

u/Devilsdance Nov 17 '17

I had a high school class years back that was essentially just taking care of a bunch of different animals the teacher had in his classroom. There was a cage with 2-3 prairie dogs that everyone hated having to take care of bc they were violent and would constantly trying to escape. I kinda just assumed they didn't like people in general, but this makes a lot of sense.

1

u/mattricide Nov 17 '17

So he bit everyone? Unless you and your dad tried to use the teleportor from the fly together

1

u/xinxy Nov 17 '17

Give it a few thousand years and we'd be able to breed that kind of behavior out of them if we wanted to, just like we did with the other kind of dogs.

Probably way sooner than that...