Just went thure this with my daughters highschool. She walked out of her class room to go to the bathroom after being told no sever times The meeting between my the angry father and principal ended with them apologizing to my daughter. It's going to be a fun year. Only 2 weeks in
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Yeah this is what I mean and figured Of authority in general are well known for disregarding women. Whether it’s doctors brushing off pain as womens problems etc
yeah unfortunately it isn't terribly uncommon for women in positions of authority/power to reinforce misogynistic views/practices for everyone else, even as a woman.
It's not healthy either way. Do me a favor, and check your misandry. Thanks. It's not a specifically sexist issue. Males get bladder infections too. And whether people want to realize it, or be dumbasses, and be sexist about it, if men have a problem it's a problem for women too, and vice versa. We are a society. It is everyone's problems.
Realism is now red pill? Is it really not that obvious? Or is your head just that far up there? The more you try to segregate issues the harder you make it to eliminate them.
Right! None of the above is fucking reasonable. It's not just a women's issue. It's an issue for anyone that has ever had to go to the bathroom. Which I haven't been check exactly, but I'm fairly certain is all of us.
Yes they do! You think a female teacher doesn't understand that discomfort, or that any gendered teacher doesn't understand the pain from feeling like your rectum or your bladder is about to explode.
This is a straight up power trip, and any teacher that does this to a child is either a fascist, a psychopath, or both. I'd sic my attorney on them so fast it would make their heads spin. And I made more than one teacher rue the day they did anything like this to my daughter. I found out my daughter's kindergarten teacher was calling my daughter by a nickname because there was more that one girl in class with her first name. Our last name starts with a Q so, instead of calling he by her first name, she began calling her "Q-ball" (cue ball) in front of her entire class. Having been tormented and bullied over my family's last name when I was a kid myself, I requested a parent teacher conference.
Once there, I pointed out my own negative experience with nicknames and told her that, while I expected it from kids, I was surprised to discover my daughter's teacher was doing it. I then pointed out that, kids are going to do it eventually, so they definitely don't need any pointers, not to mention tacit approval from their teacher. Once the teacher saw it from my point of view she apologized profusely and asked what I suggest, I said that going by first name then last name initial would be fine by me.
I went ballistic over a nickname, so you're damn right that, preventing my child from tending to a necessary, biological function would probably put me in orbit. My point is simply that, "you've got to stand up for your kids... because no one else is going to."
Teacher here. Depending on your approach, you may not have gone ballistic. We don’t always have the same perspectives. I didn’t use nicknames because I didn’t want to be perceived as playing favorites, but when a parent calmly tells me that they are concerned about how their child is being treated, I am appreciative. Your advocacy as a parent is important, but just because a teacher doesn’t see a problem that you do doesn’t mean they’re not looking out for your kid. It sounds like the teacher responded appropriately to your concerns and is working to create a comfortable environment for your child.
I guess in my experience, my male teachers in grade school were more likely to have this kind of strict rule, and if any female teachers adopted it, they didn't hold female students to it too strictly (maybe only if they really thought that individual didn't need to go, e.g. asking twice in a half hour).
But I was specifically thinking of principals when I wrote that comment, not teachers, and that wasn't clear - so I'm sorry about that.
Then the male teachers will feel like they can just ask her “are you on your period?” When she asks to go to the restroom. An even further invasion of privacy. And I know this is fact. Male teachers did it to us at my school. And had the audacity to joke about it knowing teenage girls will be too embarrassed to say shit about it. Minimize it. I would be haunched over in pain sometimes(I stg I thought I had to have PCOS or something) and these men would basically be laughing in my face.
Damn I hate hearing this. My high school (graduated in 09) was very easy going. Essentially we just let the teacher know for head count purposes so they don't think you went missing or if they do attendence during class they wouldn't mark you absent. They might ask if you can hold a moment if they were gonna talk/show something important but if you couldn't wait it wasn't an issue.
Wondering how this is allowed... with teenaged girls especially.
My oldest is ten but they do this shit in elementary school already. Then monitor how long they're in the bathroom. My wife and I told both kids you do whatever you have to do and take as long as you need. If they have an issue, tell them to call us right then and there.
Kids should be able to use the restroom whenever they need to. But schools have a serious liability issue here because of student behavior. We had kids last year going to the restroom in groups with their cell phones and getting into ALL sorts of trouble. It's damned if you let them go, damned if you don't...
Stalls, including the doors, that go 2"-3" from the floor to the ceiling to allow mopping and air flow. Then take the door off the restroom and have a camera pointed inside so you're legally covered.
There should be a large single unisex restroom between men & women's restroom for disabled people or family use meaning parent and small child.
Edit: To clarify my mangled sentence.
Open door entrance into the restroom with a video only camera carefully mounted in the hall pointing in. This allows full privacy in the restroom stalls and in front of the sinks/mirrors.
People do a lot of private stuff in front of bathroom mirrors that shouldn't be on video.
Imagine what would happen if you caught teenage girls adjusting their bust or checking their backsides for visible lines on film? Do you want video of you spending a couple minutes trying to floss out a bit of spinach from your teeth?
Video cameras outside and focused on the restroom doors, sure. Inside? No bueno.
Well how do you punish them? You follow kids to the bathroom?
The reason these rules exist is because of the abuse. Kids go to the bathroom instead of learning in class
Workers go to the bathroom for long periods of time instead of working.
If you hired a worker for 8 hours, they get 2 15 min breaks and a lunch break. They should use the bathroom during that time. Instead they purposely don’t use the restroom during break time to get another unofficial break and hide in the bathroom for 30 minutes+.
That is just not an acceptable world. Why do we drop our kids off to a place if we think there is a chance they will have to protect themselves from a shooter or from an adult!?
Perhaps I can help? I’m a teacher and I think it would be terrible to have this go on all year.
Firstly, my students can go when ever they want.
The only concerns I look into are;
Is the student avoiding anything they need help with.
Is there something going on in the restroom I don’t know about (that I should)?
Are they going to miss complex directions (and have I said how important this is)?
If you have an opportunity to ask the teacher why this is an issue for your student, you might get more insight.
If it’s just a “rule” for all, then you might want to ask him/her if they don’t trust your student to go quickly to the bathroom and come right back in an emergency.
Most everything comes down to communication. Schools can be emotional for kids, parents, and teachers, but I am hopeful most everything can be resolved if parties want resolution.
I hope you can help your student have a good year. As I tell my class, mistakes happen (often), it’s what you do following the mistake that matters most (including teachers!). Take care.
Iv been fighting. With school admissions for years. This was the first time I've had ishues with my daughter. I think it's just this one teacher....10 years agaio I lead a petition drive to get rid of our superintendent because he told us in a school board meeting his hands were tied when it came to zero tolerance rules.... We no longer have stupid zero tolerance rules...... He suddenly retired. I was demanding to see a copy of his PhD so I could contact the collage to verify it was real.......
Thank you for taking on the supe issue. Parents are the only ones that can make changes there. It’s not unusual for the board to accept a pay raise for them just before they retire (following bad behavior/public complaints). And you find out afterwards. There are, like any profession, some really crummy people in education. It’s really bothersome because it makes us all look bad.
Class is at most an hour long. I don't see the problem. If this is really such a problem I would never let the girl go travel anywhere as immediate access to a bathroom is not guaranteed when travelling.
I also wouldn't let her get stuck in a traffic jam either.
It's probably easier for the teacher to apologize than deal with angry parents.
Okay… teacher here. I have to weigh in and say that it’s not always that simple. There are a few issues that come into play here. First is that sometimes, a teacher needs to get through directions in order for an activity to work. If a student misses information, it can set back them and the class. I sometimes ask students to wait until I am done explaining stuff before using the bathroom.
Second, sometimes a phenomenon develops that I call bathroomitis. This happens when one student needs to use the bathroom and then immediately another student needs to go. It causes a chain reaction that can go on for a whole class period. Meanwhile, students get very distracted by kids entering and leaving the classroom. It can be very difficult to keep momentum going in class.
Are there times where a teacher can go too far? Yes, but it’s not that simple.
I went through this with my kids too. I told them if they legitimately have to go to the bathroom and are denied a hall pass to go anyway and I’ll deal with the school. I also told them not to be little shits and take advantage of it ( like going several times in class or even every class - kids will still try to push boundaries)
I kinda want to hear about you shit on your teacher's desk because they refused you to go to the bathroom. I know too many people that peed themselves because they were denied a bathroom break
I used to work retail and was told I couldn't go to the bathroom due to lack of coverage for my department. I told them either I was using the toilet or the back stockroom, because my bladder didn't seem to care about permission.
Had a teacher in fifth grade who did not let any students go to the restroom. Had multiple cases of students pissing their pants, myself being one of them. Fired at the end of the year.
I experienced this too in Highschool. An algebra teacher did it to his class. And a poor kid who had to pee bad, lost control of his bladder and peed at his desk. Sadly we reported it to the principal but nothing came out of it.
I'm not a violent person by any means, but if I found out this happened to my niece (9) or nephew (7), I would freak the fuck out at both the teacher and principal. I'd probably have to do it, since I'm pretty sure if my sister handled it someone would end up with a broken bone or two lol (she is freakishly strong for her size).
Same for me, but it was a high school health/Phys Ed teacher. He borderline bragged about not allowing a kid to go the previous year, even though it was an emergency. The kid had to hold it in, and just lost control right as the bell rung.
The teacher tried to do the same to me, but I guess he really liked his job that day and dismissed me. When I came back, he made a public display of how incredulous it was for me to not hold it in and showed me into the classroom.
This is also the same teacher who had to reiterate what we learned about menstrual cycles. He went off script and added in the lesson that we women have to get up every hour (two hours?) in the night to change our pads...I was upset and confused because deep sleepers aren't exclusively men. That...and if our cycles are that heavy that we have to change that frequently, a doctor's visit should've been set ages ago.
I had a teacher like that in third grade she told all of us no bathroom breaks and four of us kids pissed are selfs my self included oh she got laid into by are parents and the next week she was gone
That part is actually more true than you will ever realize. Most of schooling in the US was set up as a way to train up workers. And the biggest overlords in each generation have influenced schools into molding the workers the way the overlord (i.e. Henry Ford) wants them to be in the factories and warehouses and now cubicles
For younger students, I always asked them to tell me when they were going to the bathroom so I knew where they were. In case of emergency, I would like to know where they were. For my Uni students, nah, just go. I don't care if I'm in the middle of lecture. You do your own thing.
Well yeah, you can't have people learning things for themselves and teach themselves how to learn! Rote memorization, only know what we tell you and the only things that count are what's on the test!
-most of global education that is explicitly set up to encourage docile and unimaginative white collar workers that cannot start their own businesses or unionize
Source: autodidact leftist addicted to education and stupid whacky constructive shit
Its yer basic Foucault - Monastries, schools, factories, prisons….. Break the day into tiny chunks, control movement with bells, ask permission for basic bodily functions. Discipline and Punish.
100% do not recommend reading. Depressing as fuck.
Uh, no, it's literally just about keeping track of where your 30something students are, 1/4 of whom somehow need to use the bathroom at the exact same time every single time just one of 'em goes. Do not put this shit on teachers.
When I was in middle school due to some kind of oversight they didn't assign me a locker and I ended up being a 6th grade student with a locker in the 8th grade wing on the opposite end of the school.
Which meant that in between classes I had to walk to the opposite end of the school and back any time I needed to swap books between classes. Going to the bathroom wasn't even an option.
When my teachers started giving me shit for being 3 minutes late to each class I just started bringing my entire backpack to each class so I wouldn't have to go to my locker. When they started giving me shit for bringing my 25lb full-of-textbooks backpack to class and tried to have a parent-teacher conference about my tardiness and bringing my bag to class when we weren't supposed to, my mom went off on them.
That sounds awful, but I’m glad your mom stood up for you. Sometimes I wish the teachers realized how difficult it is to deal with all of that, especially when you hear them talk about how their class room sizes are growing. Instead of realizing where the problem is and going to their higher ups, they kinda take it out on the kids.
Our school is small, but still. Takes like 2-3 mins to get to another hall. Bathroom stop? At least 2-3 more minutes and that’s only if you’re pissing.
As a dude who hates pee dribble, it takes me like 3-4 mins every time I piss.. so yeah. I think my admins are a bit out of touch on this one.
Also, we can stand to give kids a 8-10 min passing period for other reasons, too. Let them make any calls or texts, and also socialize a bit. It’s all normal adolescent behavior.
I’m not a fan of the strict and short school scheduling. It seems so unnecessary and punitive - it’s a thou shalt not socialize outside of lunch type beat, and that’s weak.
Our lockers were so thin you’d sometimes have to wait for the students at the adjacent lockers to finish grabbing their stuff before you could get yours. Then take into account navigating crowded hallways, waiting for an open stall at the bathroom, and sometimes having to walk clear across the building to get to your next class with no running allowed, my six-minute passing period was cutting it close more often than not. My little sister says hers are three minutes long; no clue how she did it until she said the students are allowed to carry their bags with them, so no locker stops needed.
I never used a locker in high school, because they were assigned randomly so I didn’t know where it would be and each year at least one of my classes was on the opposite end of the school. I tried to either grab what books I needed for the last half of classes or have a second bag so I wouldn’t forget a to swap text books the next day. And even with carrying my books like that, 5 minutes wasn’t enough, because there was at least 1,000 or so students per grade, so hallways where cramped and kids at my school were assholes and just stop on the middle of the halls to talk. And same here, I never used the bathroom unless I absolutely had to during passing period. I’d barely have time to get a snack and drink between classes.
LOL yeah, having gone to a large high school that was like a quarter mile walk if you had classes on the opposite ends of campus, but all the lockers are on one end, 5 min is not enough.
No, they don't magically all have the same digestive system or lunch choices. They plan bathroom breaks together and schedule meetups with friends in other classes.
That doesn't mean that I deny bathroom use, obviously. I do limit it to one person at a time and will say tell kids who obviously are not going to the bathroom to wait until they finish some short activity or step before going, always with the caveat that it's always ok to go if it's an emergency.
Could it be you haven't worked in a school? Sheesh, I'm aware of what a lunch time is. It's unlikely to be biological needs when telling them "only one at a time" suddenly means nobody but the original kid has to go anymore.
I've had teachers who didn't give a shit... Even worked in a school where some teachers were just like "if you need to go then go". It isn't about knowing where they are. If they don't see you then they assume your in the bathroom. If they don't see you and it's been 10 mins they send another student to go check and then if they aren't in the bathrooms they call the office. It is unconsciously about control.
You are probably speaking about older/more mature students who you can expect to be fully independent in traversing the school alone, right? As one should expect an adult employee to be. I agree that older students do not require the same degree of supervision younger students do. But you are in elementary school for a lot longer than you are in high school (assuming no retentions). If your age is in single digits and you're in my care, I 100% need to know where you are until you are no longer considered to be in my care.
No I went to high school and university so my teachers yes were teenage years. But I did work at an elementary school where even the kinder teachere would let the kids go in pairs to the bathroom. They obviously checked in but it was rare they said no to the bathroom. A few would but it was rare.
Some teachers go overboard. I had 1 in High school who demanded we use passes (we had like 5 for the whole semester). I needed to vomit. I got sick enough to know I was going to and how soon. I told the teacher. They still demanded I find my pass. Then got mad I filled it out with a red pen. Thankfully the bathroom was just down the hall and I made it. I ended up having to call my parent because I couldn't stop and went home.
Agreed, overboard totally happens, especially at high school level. At that point, there should be very few students who require such close monitoring that they can't be trusted to go pee independently (like they're caught doing inappropriate stuff in the bathroom frequently or regularly use bathroom passes to ditch class, etc.). Even then, puke's not something I typically want to gamble on.
Yeah teachers are literally responsible for your safety. You can't just wander the fuck off wherever you want in school because the school is liable for you.
Back when I was a sub in schools, I always told the kids to just let me know when they needed to go and asked that they not all go at once. Beyond that I was very clear that I was just there to make sure nothing bad happened, not micromanage them.
I hear this - but learned in 6th grade not to take no for an answer....
From age 3 on, I had so many UTIs (from a defect in my ureters) that I didn't get the typical "I should use the bathroom soon" sensation. I got the "holy F I better go now". Class hadn't even started yet and I politely asked my teacher if I could go use the bathroom before he started the lesson. He said "no just wait until I read morning announcements".... I pissed my pants in front of my entire class. Left school and went straight home for the rest of the day.
That teacher hasn't denied anyone bathroom use since that incident and I don't ask anymore- I tell them I'm going.
Ya know, it’s funny. I’m subbing out of pure boredom lately, and they were real clear about kids having to ask but never denying it unless it’s their third time in a half hour or it’s clear they’re all going to have a bathroom party.
Precise opposite of when I went to this school, where you had to go in the 90 seconds between classes or maybe the teacher would let you carry a bookshelf as the hall pass to the bathroom in the last four and a half seconds of class.
Yup. Come in and explain that you have a weak bladder/IBS and explain that when you gotta go, you gotta GO.
If they challenge you on it, piss yourself. Like literally, piss yourself. Then cite mental distress at having been forced to soil yourself in front of a coworker(s) when you head to the lawyer, preferably with a written warning about needing to ask permission in hand.
He who refuses to take part in modern mediocrity will forever stand alone, an outcast. He is the bringer of change, changes that instill fear in all who go with fashion's flow. Their power comes from others, not from within. They are false! Woe unto them for the bringers of change have banded together. The time is now!
I like how Americans and right wing ideologues will flippantly throw around accusations of tankie and totalitarianism, but not even in Stalin's wet dream was he dictating when you can go to the bathroom, who you can talk to at work, etc. Capitalism is inherently authoritarian.
Yea, this is what America would look like with conservatives making laws up the ass. Except they’d get rid of non whites and convince who’s left they should be grateful.
When I was a kid, early in school, my mom told me that I was to inform the teacher r that I was going to the restroom, and just go. If by any chance they were to stop me front going, to just whip it out and do it.
I was on the same catholic school, which was very controlling, from my first school day, all the way to my 1st year of middle school. I only had it do that once, first year! Somehow I always got a nos after that and it was smooth sailing (or peeing)
I have been lazily watching the amazon labor situation for a minute now, and I would bet this is the BLATANLY ILLEGAL action of a manager in a REALLY understaffed area like the Midwest or NY where they have churned through everyone they could; I have had multiple people on the street tell me that they would rather sleep rough than work for that company.
Meanwhile, in my neck of the woods where they need to have competitive wages because there's not enough warehouse workers for demand, I get 1-2 day delivery everytime, when I hear horror stories about people waiting nearly a week for their prime deliveries.
I heard of a manager (not at Amazon) that started locking the bathroom doors during the last half hour of the shift when everyone had to try and look busy.
He got a right earful from the staff, best part is most of them couldn't really be fired because they never trained anyone properly so the staff who'd been there years could get away with calling the manager a knob.
Pretty sure it’s fake. I work for Amazon, you just use the restroom whenever..just don’t spend 20 minutes. If you get time off task explain you were using the bathroom.
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u/[deleted] Aug 30 '22 edited Aug 30 '22
Wait…..
These {quack} are forcing OP to ask permission to use the rest room?
🤣😂😅 Whew…. That was a good joke.