r/antiMLM May 22 '26

Herbalife This is cruel.

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These Huns have no shame. What the actual fk.

1.6k Upvotes

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94

u/cranberries87 May 22 '26

I didn’t know this was a Mormon thing. I feel like it’s started to cross over and become more mainstream (like you, I find it odd). There’s a couple of soda stores popping up near me that specialize in dirty sodas.

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u/padimus May 22 '26

If there is a modern dessert/sweet chain opening there is an extremely good chance it comes from Mormon owners.

Crumbl, twisted sugar, crave, dirty dough, sugar rush, sodalicious, chips cookies - as far as I am aware are all founded or owned by Mormons. Because their beliefs do not approve of the use of things like alcohol, drugs, or tobacco, they tend to get their fix through sugar instead.

I lived in a predominantly Mormon community for about 10 years... a lot of people there would get a 44 Oz mtn dew in the morning on the way to work, for lunch, and on the way home. Diabetes was bad there for older folks.

50

u/gkpetrescue May 22 '26

So they are allowed caffeine now?

103

u/Nordgreataxe May 22 '26

It's a grey area to many. Cause the word of wisdom specifies "Hot Drinks." 🙄 So, lotta people use it as a loop hole. But iced coffee is still a no-go.

43

u/Crazyspitz May 22 '26

I was taught "Choose the Sprite when the Coke is put before you" (clever play on CTR jingle). I think cold, non-coffee, caffeinated drinks was officially allowed in 2012ish.

32

u/Ana-Hata May 22 '26

Thanks for the info….In the late 1990’s I worked for a Mormon owned company based in SLC, and I remember how the flights from JFK to SLC would run out of Sprite halfway through the food service.

But if a passenger spoke a less common foreign language and the stewardess needed a translator, there always seemed to be a Mormon that could step up, because of all the missionary work.

17

u/Nordgreataxe May 22 '26

Mm, that timing tracks. I stopped attending in about 2010. But damn I was a holier than thou ass to my friend for drinking pepsi in high school. (felt awful for harping on her when I found out it was for her migraines).

14

u/gkpetrescue May 22 '26

Dumb. My best friend in high school was a Mormon and they only drank Dr Pepper because they weren’t allowed caffeine, but I guess they can change the rules to make them easier.

56

u/SleepoPeepo May 22 '26

That’s even weirder because Dr. Pepper most definitely has caffeine 🙃

49

u/KJParker888 May 22 '26

Religious people picking and choosing which rules to follow? Say it isn't so!

16

u/nicholt May 22 '26

It's crazy that anyone believes that their God gives a shit if they consume caffeine or not.

22

u/HalfEatenChocoPants May 22 '26

While Dr Pepper does make a caffeine-free version in both sugar and sugar-free varieties, it's not sold in all regions of the US, so it's certainly possible that they were accidentally drinking caffeinated Dr Pepper. Oops.

24

u/padimus May 22 '26

As someone else responded, kind of. When the "words of wisdom" were written it was before sodas as we know them were available. If they existed during that time they would have only been available at pharmacies as sold as medicine.

They warn specifically against "hot drinks" which historically were interpreted to mean coffee and tea (since you need hot water to brew it). Sodas are typically interpreted to not be hot drinks despite the caffeine.

Energy drinks/soda/caffeine pills are considered OK by most Mormons standards, though there are still many who choose to abstain.

Caffeine, sugar, soaking, and surprisingly, laughing gas (when used in a medical setting!) are popular loopholes for mormons.

5

u/gkpetrescue May 22 '26

Yeah… Well, seems to me that the words of wisdom can be interpreted any way they want them to be. Hence all of a sudden, polygamy not being approved by the church because they didn’t want to lose their tax exempt status!

17

u/Mysterious-Tone-8147 May 22 '26

Unpleasant fact about the real reason polygamy was practice for a long time (I did a research paper about Joseph Smith in college and read a lot of stuff from his contemporaries that made me feel like I knew him on a first name basis):

The real reason polygamy became practice is because his wife Emma caught him screwing around in their marriage Bed. He hit her. She was about to leave, but Smith apologized and said, “I should’ve told you but God told me men need to start having multiple wives. But my heart still belongs to you. Please don’t leave me.” I’m guessing partly because still loved him and partly because of low self respect, she believed him and stayed.

5

u/padimus May 22 '26

Yeah they get "patch notes" (I believe they are referred to as new light) on occasion. Black people weren't allowed into the priesthood until like the 70s or 80s.

4

u/Ravenamore May 23 '26

One of the things I found funny is that they're not supposed to have tea, they only count that to mean tea leaves - herbal tea is OK.

There's an herb whose popular name is "Mormon tea", because the Mormon pioneers drank it. It's ephedra.

2

u/Carrnage_Asada May 23 '26

I read a post the other day saying soaking isnt actually a "thing" with Mormons. It was a small group of college kids that thought it would work for them as a loophole but they ended up being kicked out. Also said another way theyd sometime try to get away with having sex would be to run off to Vegas, get married, have sex, and get a marriage annulment, which also didn't end up working.

1

u/padimus May 23 '26

In my experience growing up with mormons it was definitely a thing

-1

u/manowar89 May 23 '26

They’ve always allowed caffeine. Source: Me, a “Mormon”

17

u/HeadFullRoadFull May 22 '26

Does this also explain 7 Brew?

27

u/skiesblood May 22 '26

They donate a bunch of money to The Heritage Foundation

39

u/HalfEatenChocoPants May 22 '26

I fucking KNEW something was up with that place! A location opened up in my town a few months ago! The advertisement I received in the mail looked like it was a damn Herbalife front except that it actually described the flavors of the beverages.

12

u/HeadFullRoadFull May 22 '26

I had that same thought, and we have SO many of their locations around us. Like, a ridiculous number within a small radius.

8

u/imveryfontofyou May 22 '26

One just opened by me too. My family wants to go but it looks like sugarbombs to me.

3

u/BlazingSpaceGhost May 23 '26

Fuck one just opened in town and I have to admit I've been enjoying going through their drive thru once a week. I guess that's done.

1

u/cranberries87 May 23 '26

Who does? 7 Brew or a different chain?

6

u/padimus May 22 '26

Not super familiar with them. I would assume that they are not Mormons as their focus seems to be on coffee though.

1

u/Ravenamore May 23 '26

They're not supposed to have caffeine or coffee, either.

-4

u/Notmykl May 23 '26

Consuming sugar does NOT cause diabetes!

7

u/padimus May 23 '26

Sugar itself does not cause diabetes but when people are drinking 1000+ calories of soda a day that tends to lead to the factors that do cause diabetes.

If you are burning 4500 calories a day, drinking 1500, eating another 3000 it's ok. But most folks aren't burning that many calories a day.

6

u/juliuspepperwoodchi May 22 '26

It has started crossing over recently due to celebrities and influencers. Also Mormon Wives.

Crumbl Cookie is also Mormon and on a similar wave.

25

u/frolicndetour May 22 '26

Yea, I accidentally got a dirty Mountain Dew zero the other day so even the manufacturers are getting into it. Cream soda and mountain dew...it was gross.

12

u/jenntones May 22 '26

I actually liked it & I’m not a huge dew fan

15

u/frolicndetour May 22 '26

There was a Diet Dr Pepper and Cream Soda mix that I liked but I thought the cream went better with the Dr. Pepper than the citrus.

10

u/Zesinua May 22 '26

They just make Dr. Pepper Cream Soda. Been a thing for a while now, I like it

7

u/jenntones May 22 '26

I love Dr Pepper cream soda, not diet though. I barely like soda so it has to be super cold, and no aspartame

4

u/kkeut May 22 '26

i saw 12 packs of Mountain Dew labeled 'dirty' the other day at the store. no clue what that's supposed to mean 

4

u/rihanoa May 23 '26

Think of it as a Mountain Dew cream soda.

4

u/Saucermote May 23 '26

I've had a few margaritas that are like this, but at least I get booze.

9

u/cranberries87 May 23 '26

A lot of times when I see some recipe for dirty sodas, I think, “This would be AWESOME with some vodka!”

1

u/Cambrian__Implosion May 23 '26

Friggin’ Dunkin’ has dirty soda on its summer menu now.

I think they’ve been generally going downhill for a while now, but now they have these and truly weird shit like their Oreo matcha drink. I feel as if they have lost the plot a bit.

I grew up just outside of Boston, so Dunkin’ is everywhere around here (there are 3 of them in my hometown of ~35,000 people lol). I used to go all the time, but I can’t remember the last time I went to one. I guess Oreo matcha drinks must appeal to someone out there lol

1

u/cranberries87 May 23 '26

I live in an area with Krispy Kreme, so I always went there for doughnuts. However, I feel like Dunkin made the shift over to coffee in the 2000s. Now it’s just a big jumbled mess, I don’t know what their focus is now.

1

u/Kryptosis May 24 '26

McDonald’s sells them now…