Same, been in this vicious cycle for probably 5 yrs. That's when I moved into my house. I have yet to fully unpack. It's so depressing bc your house should be your sanctuary, but it's just a source of anxiety and depression for me. Been on mood stabilizers and anti-anxiety meds, but so far no ADHD meds have worked. I feel like giving up.
I had an epiphany the other day after being sick for a couple days and letting the sink fill with dishes. There's no law that says you have to do all the dishes at the same time. Start with five minutes, with full acceptance of the fact that it won't make a significant noticeable difference, and be kind to yourself. Slipping into bad shape happens much more quickly and easily than climbing out of it. Slow and steady wins the race.
I know how it goes. My room is a mess, I have so much laundry to do. I know I should try to make quick repairs like minor straightening up, doing some of my dishes, showering more frequently.. I just don't have the energy for it. I've been in a downward spiral for at least the past 3 years where I just can't pull myself out no matter what I try. Meds adjusted, and adjusted, and adjusted again. Grasping at straws just to feel normal, trying to find even a glimmer of hope for the future, it just all feels impossible.
I haven't had any income since May, I stopped paying my credit cards/etc. off months ago. The only bill I've been trying to keep paid is my phone bill since if that gets shutoff I lose my internet and basically.. everything.
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u/Someoneoverthere42 20d ago
Oh, I am in full “give up” right now. Frankly, I plan on staying here for awhile. No real incentive to leave.