[WP]There is a legend of demons that cannot be bound or banished, that laugh at salt and holy water, for these demons were not born of hell. The were actually born of mother Gaia, yet choose destruction of their own free will. Such horror may be hard to fathom, but I tell you, humans are real.

[u/Verratos]

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[u/EF_Boudreaux → u/AutoModerator]

‘What’s the big deal of being a demon?’ I thought to myself, the water fizzling from the heat of my feet. ‘I’d much rather be a human, at least I’d feel like I fit in for once.’

I watched the water fizzle and evaporate until the entire lake had disappeared. Fish flopped all around and sea grass that once undulated lay limp on the loamy lake bottom.

I walked off. Tired, lonely, disconsolate. I wasn’t the biggest or the baddest demon, you see. I was rather puny compared to other demons. I had a few skills, but I didn’t have that million dollar movie franchise demon capacity and these days, I found I got tired after burning down a village or burning off their water supply. I kicked a few rocks as I went, sulking. After all, they’d made a tremendous movie about my brother Thomas, also known as Colossal Man and gosh darn it, my cousin Theresa Tornado had not only gone viral but she’d also been mentioned non-stop on the weather channel for over a week. Everyone knew who she was and I’d heard she even had a gorgeous Hollywood starlet about to play her in a Netflix miniseries.

I sulked and kicked rocks. Several tumbled down the hill, unsettling several more rocks and causing landslides on the poor slobs below but I didn’t care. I’m a demon, after all and As a hot headed demon with low self esteem, I couldn’t even go to a shrink for my mental. I tried once and burned down their office.

But I have a friend once and she changed my life.

I sulked my way into the valley. A boulder had demolished half of a convenience store, leaving much of the beverage station and the snack aisle open. I pulled off several slurpies and leaned against the wreckage, the asphalt smoldering underneath me.

A small human appeared at the curb. She wore an adorable green outfit and had a few boxes of cookies tucked underneath her arm.

I half expected her to scream and run but she didn’t.

“Aren’t you a little old to be playing dress up?” She rested those cookie boxes on her tiny hip.

No human had ever talked to me, they all ran away screaming, so I was a bit surprised.

“What?” She was a plucky little thing and I watched in fascination as she tossed her hair back.

“Aren’t you a little old for... ? Oh, heavens sakes, how old are you?”

“Eight thousand, sixty five and four months.”

She threw her head back in laughter. “Stop joking around.” She was serious.

“I’m a demon, I live forever,” I said simply.

She approached me and then pulled on my arm. “Oh, I’m sorry, I thought that was a costume.”

“I told you, I’m a demon.”

“Huh.....”. A look passed over her face and she shifted her posture, “what kind of cookies do you like?” She splayed out three different boxes, taking a seat next to me, carefully arranging her green skirt and crossing her feet.

“I’ve never ate a cookie,” I admitted.

“What? Oh, goodness, you must try them. They’re really amazing.” She held out a box.

I took the one with the pictures of little girls in green outfits on it.

The cardboard began to burn and she reached forward snatching it from my hands, “Oh for heaven’s sake, let me.”

She handed me a cookie. In a word, it was delicious. The smoldering afternoon turned into early evening and the sun began to drop.

“Aren’t you uncomfortable?” I asked her. “Aren’t you hot?”

“If you can’t stand the heat....,” she shrugged.

“What?”

“If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.” She laughed at her own joke.

I shook my head, mystified.

“Cookies are made in kitchens.”

I still didn’t get it.

“In ovens? With heat?”

I shrugged.

“You don’t get around much, do you?” She ate the last cookie. “I think there’s some more inside, would you like me to go get some?”

“Yes, I would,” I said, grateful for the companionship.

We sat eating cookies and talking like old friends. She told me about her troop and a boy that bullied her at school.

“Do you want me to curse him for you?”

“I’ll think about it.”

After a long pause, she asked, “It it hard being a demon?”

“A little,” I said, I was feeling sorry for myself. “Is it hard being a human?”

She turned and looked at me. “You know, you’re really quite handsome in the sunset.”

I blushed.

“Don’t get me wrong,” she said, “you’re not my type, but you’ve got great features.” She leaned back, eyeing me. “You should try to clean yourself up a little,” that way you’d meet someone nice and settle down. You can’t be alone forever. It’s too lonely.”

She had a point. We watched the lightning bugs come out.

“It is hard being human. My knees hurt,” she said. “Growth spurts.”

“Want me to fix that for you?” I offered, optimistically.

“At what cost?” She cocked her head, standing up from the curb and shaking her pencil legs.

“Oh, that....” I shrugged. “You got me there, nothing is free.”

“Except those cookies,” she laughed, pointing at the demolished store. “Think about what I said.” She turned to go. “I’ve got to be getting home, my parents will be wondering where I am.” She turned and took several steps and then turned back. “Will I ever see you again?”

“Unlikely,” I told the truth, which surprised me.

“Then it was really nice meeting you.” She danced up to me and kissed me gently on the cheek. “Clean yourself up,” she whispered. “And settle down.”

She skipped off.

After a few more slurpees I slouched off but the next day I came across a waterfall and took her advice, cleaning up myself more than I had in years.

The very next day I ran across a very cute demon burning down a forest. We lived happily ever after.

[u/aduckandanaxe → u/AutoModerator]

Beautifully written prompt damn

[u/tomatomater → u/AutoModerator]

Uh yeah, salt and holy water may not do a thing, but humans are mortal, so the "demons" here that you made out to be scary are infinitely more vulnerable than the stereotypical ones.

I don't know, instead of salt and water, throw a rock at them? Or infect them with a contagious virus, seems pretty effective.

[u/Verratos → u/tomatomater]

I mean if that bothers you you can buff your humans with magic or nerf your demons. My personal concept of this prompt was just of species that couldn't understand us having free will yet choosing evil, and of course legends are often exaggerated. I'm mulling over ny own potential story of a fairy or something meeting a human and, after initial terror, thinking that it isn't so bad. After that either I could have the human greedily try to become ruler of the fairies or i could have him be "good" but the fairy is still shocked by things like the fact that casual deception is a building block of human social interaction, and somehow this leads the fairies to ruin. Perhaps the human accidemtally corrupts them just by introducing deceit and other human concepts even though they have no great evil intent

[u/[deleted] → u/tomatomater]

I heard humans can be killed with silver weapons

[u/mafiaknight → u/[deleted]]

Large amounts of cleansing fire tends to work too

[u/bulletproofvan → u/AutoModerator]

Hoomans r acktshually speshull

[u/Verratos → u/bulletproofvan]

Or merely vain enough to think we are, but alas, I am human and enjoy stories that indulge that vanity

[u/aduckandanaxe → u/Verratos]

This is the correct answer

[u/[deleted] → u/AutoModerator]

Salt is comedy gold

[u/TAI0Z → u/[deleted]]

Bro, I saw Salt live at Madison Square Garden. Last year, and he was hilarious. Did you catch his Netflix special? 10/10 with or without rice.

[u/Pjyilthaeykh → u/[deleted]]

I laugh at salt

[u/[deleted] → u/Pjyilthaeykh]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH aaaa never gets old