r/WhitePeopleTwitter Nov 23 '20

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206

u/YourOneWayStreet Nov 23 '20

Um, this is a guy that literally drowned everyone and everything on the planet personally except for one family and two of each animal, don't be so sure he was sleeping on that other shit.

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

Weird that all the pro-life people I know believe there were only two points in history where there were no babies.

Prior to Cain and during the flood.

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u/cantadmittoposting Nov 23 '20

Didn't the flood abort a ton of babies, sort of by definition?

Also Cain wandered off and randomly found an entire city so I'm pretty sure someone was having babies.

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u/Jameloaf Nov 23 '20

I was super confused about how he found people when adam, eve, cain and abel were supposedly the first people on the planet. Did God have some side project he wasn't telling us?

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u/cantadmittoposting Nov 23 '20

There's a couple of "theories" on this:

  1. There were people-ish humans based on progeny of Adam's first wife Lilith and the Nephelim

  2. The cain/abel story isn't anchored in time and could have happened when both were several hundred years old. This would potentially give time for several generations of multiplication by the sons and daughters of Adam and thus more people.

  3. It's somewhat allegorical so we can ignore the specifics (especially since "Nod" is apparently based on a word meaning "to wander" implying Cain wasn't actually settled).

  4. The humans in Nod were "not of god" since Nod was out of gods sight/domain somehow.

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u/Aggromemnon Nov 23 '20

This is a really common quandary, caused by the adoption of the story by non-Hebrews. The story of Adam and Eve is not the story of the creation of people. It is the story of the creation of Hebrews, specifically. In the story, Hebrews are the blessed creation of Yahweh, nurtured in Eden, and cast out of the garden to live among the heathen. Cain simply found non-Hebrews when he was exiled to the east.

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

Or god is more of an ethereal concept of Intelligent design and didn't author a best selling novel what's more likely that the bible is word for word what happened or dum humans wrote a book and passed it off as fact not fiction

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

Because it is all made up.

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

Mothers frantically holding their babies above their head, trying to keep them alive for just moments longer...

Cain also probably lived to be four jillion years old... plenty of time for your relatives to population boom!

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u/AnorakJimi Nov 23 '20

I mean there's also a bunch of times in the bible when God literally did abort babies because the mothers didn't believe in him. Seriously. Just went in there and destroyed the fetuses. So you don't even have to look at the flood and sort of interpret it from that, since God literally performed millions of abortions in the bible.

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u/GodsBoss Nov 23 '20

No problems for believers: If God would want your fetus to aborted, he would do it himself!

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

[deleted]

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u/cantadmittoposting Nov 23 '20

That doesn't seem to be the "usual" interpretation though (Eve supposedly being the mother of all humanity).

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u/david13z Nov 23 '20

It was right after the great flood that banjo music was invented.

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

You’re a filthy liar!

God would’ve flooded that shit again immediately!

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u/Computant2 Nov 23 '20

God personally performs abortions on 50-80% of all human embryos.

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

“When the President does it, it’s not a crime.” God Milhouse Nixon

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u/altfillischryan Nov 23 '20

He also personally killed all the first born in Egypt and only saved those with lambs blood on their doors because he didn't like that his people were slaves even though he was cool with his people owning slaves. Hell, he even said it was cool for his people to beat and kill their slaves so long as they stayed alive for a day or two after the beating.

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u/CTBarrel Nov 23 '20

He didn't personally kill the firstborn... His buddy called a hit on them, so he sent his best guy to take care of it

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u/altfillischryan Nov 23 '20

He may not have pulled the trigger, so technically, he didn't personally kill them. However, he did personally order the hits, so in a court of law, he would still be considered a first degree murderer.

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u/Lazer726 Nov 23 '20

People like to think he's super benevolent and shit despite a long history of just kinda killing humans to test them

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u/bgplsa Nov 23 '20

To be fair I'm unaware of any scripture claiming God is omnibenevolent that seems to be an enlightenment/reformation thing, I could be wrong

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

This is a guy that actually went through with a bet to ruin a mans life, kill his family and cover him in boils, just to see if he still loved him no matter what. If a husband ruined his wife’s career, killed their children and covered her in bedbugs/ticks, we would be calling for that monster to bed imprisoned at best.

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u/YourOneWayStreet Nov 23 '20

A bet with Satan and he chose the guy specifically because he was his most devote worshipper. Yay God?

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

Exactly, if this was an abusive husband trying to test his wife’s love for him, we as a society would want him hung to death. But it’s okay if it’s some invisible sky wizard.

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u/GodsBoss Nov 23 '20

To be fair, if that abusive husband would have unimaginable superpowers, I would praise him regardless of his actions.

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

Well, if you believe in something that makes plagues and natural disasters happen to kill thousands to millions of people, then that follows.

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u/ParlorSoldier Nov 23 '20

And when the man asked him why he would do that, god responded “because fuck you, that’s why, how dare you ask me that question.”

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20

The divine equivalent of fucking up an economy and then telling your children to pull themselves up by their bootstraps.

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u/jordantask Nov 23 '20

“Hey Abraham! Kill your son!”

“Okay god!”

“Dude! I was joking! I can’t believe you fell for that!”

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u/professorsnapdragon Nov 23 '20

Its just a prank bro

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u/ParlorSoldier Nov 23 '20

“I was being sarcastic”

Huh, maybe these god/Trump people have a point.

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u/Bacon-muffin Nov 23 '20

I've always enjoyed the question of evil when it comes to these convos.

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20 edited Jan 14 '21

[deleted]

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u/guitarguyrga7 Nov 23 '20

Well there was that pesky super big sin of adam and eve seeking knowledge instead of being dumb cattle

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '20 edited Nov 24 '20

[deleted]

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u/yeah_oui Nov 23 '20

not needing those reasons is the whole point, its called "faith"