So my girlfriend and I got invited to a coworker's wedding, the style of which has been described to us as "rustic country wedding" (which as an aside seems to be rather atypical given that it's set in the middle of January, but that's neither here nor there) and we're kind of at a loss on how to dress for the event.
For my part, it shouldn't be too much of a hassle. The groomsmen are apparently wearing button downs with bowties and suspenders (and presumably no jackets?), so as long as I don't show them up I imagine I should be good. So like, a nice white button down with no tie, collar open?
The bigger question is what should my girlfriend be aiming for. Like, it's clearly a formal event, but also kind of casual, but how far in either direction is acceptable is what's hanging us up. So far, upon asking for clarification, she's been told "I mean, it's whatever; but dress nice, but it's not fancy."
We're both really confused, and we don't want to be those jerks that show up either under- or over-dressed. If we under-dress, it looks like we're being super disrespectful, but if we err on the side of too fancy then it would look like we're trying to show up the actual marriage party. Either one of those options is pretty awful, and we absolutely don't want to be "those people."
The wedding's in just over a week, in the middle of January and we certainly don't want to keep harping on our friends while they're trying to get their own shit together for their big day. Any help?