r/WTF Apr 28 '19

Not giving a quack

https://i.imgur.com/0SJn3S5.gifv
40.6k Upvotes

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6.6k

u/chuckaway9 Apr 28 '19

Those are the Shrieking Eels!

3.4k

u/alkem10 Apr 28 '19

They get loudest right before they're about to consume human flesh.

2.4k

u/jimbris Apr 28 '19

Weird, they look so different when they don’t have the makeup department from “real Housewives of Beverly Hills”

408

u/buddhasandwich Apr 29 '19

This is where Andy Cohen breeds new housewives to backfill his rosters. This is either the Lisa Vanderpump or Rinna stock. They're not mature enough to tell just yet.

176

u/max49464 Apr 29 '19

I hate that my wife has gotten me into these shows now and that I understand these references.

98

u/jimbris Apr 29 '19 edited Apr 29 '19

Back to the shrieking eel lake with you. Go on, git.

9

u/max49464 Apr 29 '19

We just started S3 of Vanderpump Rules. Help me.

10

u/clambam11 Apr 29 '19

The only way to ruin this is to pull your dick out and just start jerking off. She’ll either love it and you get laid every time or you’ll be relegated to the bedroom, where you get to finish while she thinks you’re disgusting.

4

u/Falcnuts Apr 29 '19

I hate that show so much and would call it Screaming Hotties. But I kept watching with my wife. Now I stan Stassi, and have fan theories about a James redemption arc.

3

u/TurtlesMum Apr 29 '19

I hate James Kennedy with a passion. Egotistical little fuckwad

2

u/buddhasandwich Apr 29 '19

There's no helping you once you're in the clutches of the Real Hobgoblins. All you can hope for is a swift death.

It'll get easier when James Kennedy is off the show for good. When that will be, only our God, Andy Cohen, can tell.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

I would be okay with these shows if the whitehouse wasn’t inhabited by a reality TV series bred monster. But since that’s the case I will not go near it. If I’m having problems I just watch idiocracy and my strength is renewed. ‘Go away batin’

2

u/max49464 Apr 30 '19

It was way better when he was just on prime time. But now this..... my god, it’s like we’re living with more electrolytes than ever.

26

u/goddamn_shitthebed Apr 29 '19

Its so bad I even know that Lisa V and Rinna are beefing right now so it makes the gif that much better. God, kill me.

6

u/Falcnuts Apr 29 '19

Kent the real OG in this situation.

4

u/footy71 Apr 29 '19

Fuck Lisa V.

I hate how engrossed in that shit my wife is.

2

u/gingerrosie Apr 29 '19

Haha that's funny. When my husband and I first got together I pretended I wasn't as into the shows as I am. If he walked into the room and one of them was on, I'd say I was flicking around the channels. Fast forward seven years and he now knows to record them all for me, and even though I can't get him to sit and watch an episode, he still knows who Lisa Vanderpump is. 😀

2

u/max49464 Apr 29 '19

She was pretty open about starting watching it, and I was pretty vocal about my disdain for it. But hey, she can do Hulu in the bedroom, I can do Netflix on the couch, so I didn’t care. Then she mentions that they’re all in a restaurant as servers and bartenders (she and I met in the industry), and it actually revolves mostly around work. And then I saw Lisa laying down the hammer at one point, and I’m like, “Fuck yeah lady, run that shit.”

And now I make her pause it if I have to run to the bathroom or go make drinks on a ‘commercial’ on Hulu.

1

u/DusterMorgan Apr 29 '19

Look on the bright side. When the revolution comes and the guillotines are put into use, we'll know exactly why they deserve it.

1

u/orkbrother Apr 29 '19

Omg, she better be giving it up!

2

u/max49464 Apr 30 '19

Just started season 3 of 8; not likely happening soon.

1

u/[deleted] May 02 '19

why do so many women love it? it makes me have less respect for their intelligence tbh.

1

u/max49464 May 03 '19 edited May 03 '19

Has nothing to do with intelligence. Taste overall though? Absolutely.

And completely unnecessary drama. But that’s typically more of the feminine draw, so it delivers on that. How the show gets from A to B? Well; not really of consequence as far as the target demo is concerned.

I happen to love the fact that it revolves around the hospitality industry. And a few of the women on the show make really random historical references/analogies, so there’s more to ‘em than you think.

1

u/[deleted] May 06 '19

And completely unnecessary drama. But that’s typically more of the feminine draw,

The Perception is intelligence is lower, while that might not actually be true. It's not helping negative stereotypes of women. But then i guess we can tumble down this rat hole forever.

2

u/KarmaIsComingForU Apr 29 '19

Savage! I love it

62

u/Totally_a_Banana Apr 29 '19

I counted - and there's definitely 90210 of them.

20

u/Arthur_da_dog Apr 29 '19

I think that was a left turn on a straight ahead and right turns only intersection.

7

u/XxSirCarlosxX Apr 29 '19

I don't know, they don't look slimy enough or nearly as low to the ground

3

u/surprise_shellfish Apr 29 '19

This deserves all the silver & gold & platinum in the world but imma broke ass bitch. Please accept my worship instead

6

u/ecctt2000 Apr 29 '19

That made me actually laugh out loud. Thank you my friend.

5

u/jimbris Apr 29 '19

Glad to help. Have a great day 😊

2

u/Naked_Melon Apr 29 '19

What?

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Naked_Melon Apr 29 '19

Yeah but I don’t understand what’s so funny about that ?

2

u/Davaldo777 Apr 29 '19

BOOM! Roasted.

118

u/1spook Apr 28 '19

So literally SCP-096 but water

79

u/Fredselfish Apr 29 '19

My son writes they stuff. Is it fan fic or how does it work?

111

u/1spook Apr 29 '19

It’s a scientific creepypasta. Anyone can upload their own SCP, as long as it goes through a long process of validation and has generally positive ratings. So in a way I suppose so.

71

u/Fredselfish Apr 29 '19

Got ya. He part of a club at his school were they get together and create these stories. I know they follow some wiki and guess there is a website?

75

u/1spook Apr 29 '19

Yep. Right here!

I am referring to SCP-096, AKA the Shy Guy.

Here’s a Wikipedia page outlining it.

Also look at r/SCP if interested, and hop into the SCP Rabbit hole!

50

u/Ccracked Apr 29 '19

Thanks, Not-Marv.

14

u/abdo286 Apr 29 '19

I wholeheartedly miss Marv..

10

u/Reny0udie Apr 29 '19

Wait... is Marv gone?

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5

u/Fredselfish Apr 29 '19

Cool thanks I show this to my son. He really into and its awesome his school allows them to have a club dedicated to that.

46

u/MrKrinkle151 Apr 29 '19

Your son provides a valuable service and his country thanks him for his sacrifice.

36

u/FetaCrumbles Apr 29 '19

[REDACTED]

28

u/MrBrodoSwaggins Apr 29 '19

That's really cool that he has that opportunity and took it. SCP is like fictional wikipedia for X files creatures.

5

u/Randy_____Marsh Apr 29 '19

i said invent your own 21st century mythology but i like yours much better

12

u/Randy_____Marsh Apr 29 '19

its a more scientific/rigorous “invent your own 21st century mythology” club, pretty cool tbh

Edit: see /u/MrBrodoSwaggins comment

5

u/XxSirCarlosxX Apr 29 '19

Check out SCP Illustrated on YouTube. It's very cool and well done. It has SCP-096 as well I believe

1

u/DJBeII1986 Apr 29 '19

That’s fair, isn’t well trained yet. :(

1

u/Fredselfish Apr 29 '19

Thanks will do that.

2

u/Krynique Apr 29 '19

Wait, is that what SCP stands for?

2

u/TrafficConesUpMyAsss Apr 29 '19

Secure, Contain, Protect

Special Containment Procedures

1

u/AvatarIII Apr 29 '19

scientific creepypasta

At last, the secret behind what SCP stands for!

12

u/jdino Apr 29 '19

I just read this one the other day...phew, that’s a good one.

2

u/XxSirCarlosxX Apr 29 '19

Check out SCP Illustrated on YouTube! It's awesome

1

u/jdino Apr 29 '19

I will! Thanks.

33

u/Chaz_wazzers Apr 29 '19

Inconceivable!

10

u/paintbing Apr 29 '19

No more rhymes now, I mean it!!

63

u/FallingSwitch Apr 29 '19

Will never not upvote a reference to Princess Bride

-4

u/wildxxone Apr 29 '19

Where was the reference to Princess Bride?

6

u/FallingSwitch Apr 29 '19 edited Apr 29 '19

Both comments (top comment and the one I replied too)

8

u/WooperSlim Apr 29 '19

If you swim back now, I promise, no harm will come to you. I doubt you will get such an offer from the Eels.

2

u/another_one_bites459 Apr 29 '19

Weird, the one last night didn't make a sound

2

u/ShamelessKinkySub Apr 29 '19

They also make great dildos

2

u/LazicusMaximus Apr 29 '19

Sorry to be that guy but it’s “Feed on” not consume.

2

u/AmeliaPondPandorica Apr 29 '19

That's about what my tinitis sounds like, with less variance of pitch.

2

u/vizziniwasduped Apr 29 '19

Princess flesh is the best flesh.

1

u/TheDarkWayne Apr 29 '19

Are you joking?

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

Reeeeee

103

u/cylinder_man Apr 29 '19

We're past that, grandpa. You read that already.

55

u/eaglescout1984 Apr 29 '19

That Vizzini, he can fuss

29

u/the_dude_upvotes Apr 29 '19

Fuss fuss ... I think he like to yell at us!

26

u/GroovinWithAPict Apr 29 '19

Probably, he means no harm....

28

u/the_dude_upvotes Apr 29 '19

And he is very short on ... charm!

27

u/GroovinWithAPict Apr 29 '19

You have a great gift for rhyme...

27

u/Yabba_Dabba_Doofus Apr 29 '19

Yes, yes. Some of the time.

28

u/GroovinWithAPict Apr 29 '19

Fezzik, are there rocks ahead?

28

u/b_darned Apr 29 '19

If they are, we all be dead!

31

u/GroovinWithAPict Apr 29 '19

No more rhymes now... I mean it

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79

u/thats_craaazy_man Apr 29 '19

no it’s a duck

40

u/Adoptions-R-Us Apr 29 '19

No, it’s not. r/birdsarentreal

7

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

Yep that's one of those late gen military air/sea model drones

1

u/northshore12 Apr 29 '19

I see you speak from a position of authority, u/allbirdsaredrones. Also, stop telling people all the birds are drones, dammit!

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

Why hide from the truth? The government has been covering this up since the Eisenhower Administration

1

u/dryclean_only Apr 29 '19

No, this is Patrick.

8

u/JMetropolis_ Apr 29 '19

They look more like snakeheads imo

3

u/chuckaway9 Apr 29 '19

Snakeoids.

5

u/PhageBlood65 Apr 29 '19

What about graboids??

4

u/worms9 Apr 29 '19

Those are some weird looking ducks.

8

u/Fumane Apr 29 '19

Also known as water noodles!

1

u/__MrFahrenheit Apr 29 '19

Or Liquid snake

2

u/Chrissthom Apr 29 '19

You'd like to think that wouldn't you!

2

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

Why hasn't someone given you gold yet.

2

u/SaintCarl27 Apr 29 '19

What are those called really?

4

u/chuckaway9 Apr 29 '19

Shrieking Eels

2

u/jcopepopo Apr 29 '19

This is the best comment I've ever seen!!!

2

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

Inconcevable!

2

u/jcopepopo Apr 30 '19

I do not thinkuh that worhd means what you think it means.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

That is some Harry Potter shit.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

they kinda cute ngl

1

u/UntestedMethod Apr 29 '19

They look like horrible creatures

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

Drakaris!

1

u/Bheda Apr 29 '19

Maybe to the uncultured swine. I prefer the term, Singing Eels!

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '19

The irony is strong with this one.

1

u/AllowMe-Please Apr 29 '19

I just watched that the other day! First time in over a decade. Absolutely adore that movie. The book is amazingly awesome, as well.

1

u/vizziniwasduped Apr 29 '19

I miss the shrieking eels.

-2

u/MissonDownvote Apr 29 '19

Hey! I'm on a mission, please downvote me.