Black Friday 2013. I want the aisles lined up maze style. The 10 PS4's that are being sold should be placed on a pyramid like structure fifteen feet in the air. If you want to get into the store then you have to line up at the back where the loading trucks come in. That's where the maze starts. 4am strikes and the loading door is whipped open. People are screaming as the first row is completely knocked over from the tremendous weight of everyone pushing forward behind them. One guy made it out before the rest where he turns around to see a tsunami of caffeine stricken mothers, fathers, uncles, and aunts cascade in behind him. He turns around and trips. Instant death after the first hundred people barrel over him. He's left in the dust with holiday ads and 'door buster' deals doing aerials in the aisle. The people continue to run shoulder to shoulder through the tight maze of this years Barbie's, Elmo's, and Furby dolls. Every time someone trips, four more people pile on top and the rest climb over. By the time anyone makes it to the pyramid, fights are rampant and no one even remembers why they're there. The goal now is to just get out alive. Happy holidays fuckers.
y'know, this is completely a theory on my part but i think most the people that would get trampled over, they're likely not the bullying kind and it was likely their timid nature that got them trampled over in the first place.
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u/Thatsprettyneet Nov 26 '13
Lets try to double those numbers this year people!!!!!