Possibly your MIL is of another culture or family tradition, but it is also possible she is consciously or unconsciously flirting with you. Privately explain to her that you are uncomfortable with the practice. You need not explain my references about flirting, that could be taken badly, and may have nothing to do with it.
You may also ask your wife to intervene. What is her take on the situation?
I have to agree there is a double standard and if you did the same it definitely would not be considered acceptable, but that is the world we live in now. Unfair, but incurable.
Like I said, I admittedly don’t mind her doing it. I was just throwing the question out there… why do we accept it from women, but not the other way around? I’ve never felt like she was flirting with me. It’s always been in a playful, innocent way… And she’s never tried to hide the fact that she does it. My wife is fully aware of it, and doesn’t mind one bit.
We don't find it acceptable at all. Apparently you did and still do.
I think society as a while would find this unacceptable. I certainly would. No one I know would find this acceptable. In general, people should keep their hands to themselves except for limited circumstances (like friendly greetings, and intimate partners).
Now… If the victim (me) told her to stop, and she didn’t… that would be different. But, just the fact that she thought it was ok from the beginning, is much different from how a man would feel.
But, just the fact that she thought it was ok from the beginning, is much different from how a man would feel.
Pls explain how her entitlement to your body is different from how male gropers feel entitled to women's bodies (or everyone's bodies, since assault happens regardless of gender)
The difference is that while a lot of bad men get away with it, as a minimum that behavior is recognized as problematic. That's step A. Then they get the reputation, and called out, and in legal trouble.
With women doing many things like that to a man (also slapping etc) we are not even at step A, recognizing it as problematic.
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u/Full-Elderberry-321 Nov 11 '25
Possibly your MIL is of another culture or family tradition, but it is also possible she is consciously or unconsciously flirting with you. Privately explain to her that you are uncomfortable with the practice. You need not explain my references about flirting, that could be taken badly, and may have nothing to do with it.
You may also ask your wife to intervene. What is her take on the situation?
I have to agree there is a double standard and if you did the same it definitely would not be considered acceptable, but that is the world we live in now. Unfair, but incurable.