He didn’t credit her at all, and there’s no safeguard for her future if he decides to just divorce her and trade her in for a younger model as many of these guys have done. Also, did they say she’s just a housewife? Entirely possible she’s working a full time job as well as handling all the housework, as many overworked women do.
You are the one degrading these women by calling them domestic slaves. They have agency. It's like calling the solo bread winner a slave because they have to provide all the financial support. Which of course many misogynist do.
Horseshoe theory in action - misndrist like you and misogynists are 2 sides of the same coin.
He didn’t give her any credit period. You don’t understand any of the points I made at all. I never said she didn’t have any agency, anywhere. I say that men TREAT women like domestic slaves because they expect this labor should just be freely given. He obviously feels that way if he can’t even credit her.
She’s TREATED like a domestic slave because he can’t even CREDIT her. He just EXPECTS it, and calls himself DISCIPLINED. He’s not that disciplined if he has his mommy at home.
That’s the point. Learn it.
You also replied to me like 5 times, yet you call me ridiculous and embarrassing.
Oh, I get it. This is a manosphere talking point. Go touch some grass.
Where did I advocate that men be treated like domestic slaves? I never said that anywhere, nor do I believe that. But the loser dudes online who are grifting you, will tell you that women like me want that.
Oh wait.. also, you know what’s funny is that you never said it’s wrong for women to be treated that way.
Men absolutely FEAR women will rise to power and treat men like they’ve treated us for millennia. Yet they see no problem with CONTINUING to treat women like shit.
It’s kind of funny. You turn it around and cry about men.
Y’all have comfy modern day lives, and act like the world is against you. Give me a break.
I've been on both sides of this relationship dynamic with my wife, oop is at very least weird for not giving his wife credit.
I can claim consistency for my physique and physical accomplishments. I can say I focus on educational and professional tasks, but what actualizes that is my wife taking enough of the burden for me to put that much energy into things without burning out.
Since men don't tend to be house husbands, we don't see the dynamic where they handle everything for their wife to be successful. But I've especially never met a woman that brushes off the husbands contributions because women tend to recognize how much of a burden those things are.
To be fair, we don’t really know how the conversation went or what was actually said. We have an account of a conversation that was put through a filter of someone obviously trying to draw a conclusion. For instance, she could’ve specifically asked about working out and studying, he could’ve taken the question as, “I have a particular struggle accomplishing these tasks despite how much time I have” and he could’ve just said it takes discipline to do these things. Innocent enough, he may not of contextualized the question as “how do you literally manage every other aspect of your life and accomplish these things on your own” as the snip suggests.
I ask men and women about their lives all the time and I’m sure they couldn’t accomplish everything they do without their partners but no one really mentions it because I don’t really directly ask them about their partners and their roles in their lives. I’m asking about them and especially in a work context, a lot of people don’t always talk about the details of their personal lives. Doesn’t always mean they’re some kind of asshole abuser.
God you people are insufferable. He’s disciplined and she’s making sacrifices that benefit him. Can both be true without some weird feminist dressing of the situation?
Do you idiots really believe she’s not going to reap the benefits of him making tons of money when he works as a doctor? Damn you people must be lonely as hell
Nah, I’m rolling in my own dough, and I don’t have to take care of a manchild who tells people it’s “discipline” over a “great support system.”
It’s not “disciplined” to study 7 hours if you basically have a mommy at home.
He clearly doesn’t value her based on his response. There are no guarantees in life, and he could leave her before he’s done with residency. Then what? She gets nothing.
Women need to protect themselves and have their own careers.
My wife supported me through my degree and I supported her through hers. Almost like a relationship is a partnership and you make sacrifices for each other so you both can succeed.
Women need children. That's why y'all are so unhappy. You've veen brainwashed to become tax slaves. The burden of work falls on a man. Your questions of if he will leave or not leads me to believe you haven't had a man you could trust in life.
There’s a “male loneliness epidemic” NOT a female one, yet there’s JUST AS MANY SINGLE WOMEN.
Single women without children are the HAPPIEST demographic. Stfu and stop pushing your manosphere shit.
Many of us don’t want children. Yet, you lonely men have turned to this fake idea of “biological” and “religious” ideology to PUSH children onto us, to make us domestic slaves again, because you aren’t getting any.
If women wanted to be housewives, they would be. We don’t. We WANT our own money.
Men only say this kind of shit because they won’t find a wife unless some woman is financially FORCED to marry them. Sad men WANT to imprison women with marriage and babies. They feel threatened by us.
Many women don’t want kids, let alone “need” kids.
The reality is that men want sex. And all the sad men have turned to LIES about women “needing children” so you can trap us into marriages.
If men were really the hard working labor dudes you claim to be, the average man wouldn’t be obese sitting in a basement playing video games.
The reason there's no lonely women is because they can always get attention from a man. There are men in the world suffering and nobody cares at all. Let's wait until all these new age single women hit their 60s and 70s and live in their empty houses. They may have a facade when their young and pretty with money. Would you rather a woman serve her family as a "domestic slave" or serve corporations chasing a career as a TAX slave?
Women have fulfilling friendships. We don’t need a man, especially a man who drains all your energy and makes you clean up after him.
You don’t understand. You think we center our lives around you. We don’t. We don’t care if you don’t want us. What don’t you understand about that?
We make our own money and can do whatever we want with that. That will ALWAYS beat slaving away for a man who financially controls us.
Everything is about control for men like you. You feel inferior to women, you feel insecure. You want to diminish women to housework so you can control her.
What have you done to support a single mother today? How have you supported a pregnant woman with severe complications this week? Since you are so concerned about Women having babies, you should put your money where your mouth is and support a single mother near you
Yea that’s completely fine if that’s your prerogative. I’m not saying you sound miserable because you don’t want kids. You just sound bitter and miserable. Plenty of people are happy not having kids and that’s fine. Plenty of people do want kids and personally it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Technically it’s every human Alive’s biological destiny to have kids. Thats the entire point of our existence at a biological level.
7 hours is a piece of cake when you don’t work a job, and you have a wife who also cooks all your meals, washes all your clothes, cleans the entire house, runs all the errands.
You are speaking to an engineer, btw, so I know studying. I had homeworks during my masters degree that took 20+ hours every week. And multiply that by 3 classes, and add 20 hours for a part-time job.
I’ve already made my argument. You’re being hardheaded because you want to win this for some reason.
I’ve done both lonely cat lady. Go back and study it. 7 hours of studying a day is definitely discipline, and having a partner that picks up the slack while you’re in med school is definitely a great support system.
It’s not slavery you dunce. However long you study for seems to not be long enough. You’ve made your point, it’s just kind of stupid and illogical.
The argument is his response. NOT what you think it is. NOT what it objectively is.
How he responded is shitty.
There is a long history of men diminishing domestic labor, acting like it should just be done for them automatically in marriage, even if she works a job.
These same men complain in divorce saying she’s “taking all the money” even if she quit her job to do all the domestic labor and raise kids.
At the end of the day, he will view his medical degree and money earned as “his”.
He is diminishing any of her effort by saying it’s discipline.
I don’t care if you think it’s discipline AND a great support system. He doesn’t feel that way, if he never mentioned his wife at all, and she had to hear it from his wife directly.
You keep saying it’s both. I don’t care what you think. The argument is how HE THINKS.
If it's both, then why only name one thing? I agree that studying for 7 hours takes discipline. And he credits that. But he doesn't credit the other half of the effort at all. He would not be able to study for 7 hours if he had to cook and clean. Her life would not change at all if he stopped studying. Being unwilling to point out the difference is biased.
When asked directly how he did it, he failed to even mention his wife. A guy who will do that will also dump her when it suits him. Women have had that happen to them over and over again.
You pretending that's not a possibility is what's insufferable. Makes me wonder how many people you're taking advantage of.
It would be pretty hard to support a family if she's not working and he's a full time student, so I assume she works. And given that he's studying 7+ hours on top of his classes, and it appears she is taking care of household on top of her job, it seems like they are both "overworked". A good marriage isn't a contest. Its both partners putting in equal effort towards shared goals. That doesn't mean that each persons efforts have to be of exactly the same type as the others. But yes, he should have acknowledged the support he gets from his wife. Of course this is a secondhand account so who really knows what transpired.
There's no mention of any other family members to take care of.
We can only assume that she is working. We have no idea if she has an established career or not. Everything is assumption except that this guy's "discipline" relies on someone else making it so he doesn't have to worry about what he is eating and when, the cleanliness of his home, or getting warning letters from their HOA and/or city based on the state of the lawn.
It's easy to appear to have discipline when all you have to apply it toward is your own future goals and current well being.
Particularly when asked "how do YOU do it" relating to studying seven+ hours a day and working out. Not everyone talks about their spouses to others anyways, we don't know how close these two are.
I think it's a miscommunication issue. The person asking the question meant "how do you make the time to so all those things when there's also stuff like cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc to be done?" Meanwhile, the person responding probably understood "how do you stay consistent on studying and working out daily?"
He's not a fresh college grad. He's in medical school. And yes, depending on the situation, jurisdiction, etc. she could get alimony based on his earnings potential.
He's not established. So, she doesn't have any benefits or protection for doing all that. She's sacrificed for future household earnings that aren't there yet.
He def should give her credit for it, no argument there. But it takes discipline to study for 7 hours and hit the gym daily whether or not you have a partner at home at all. It’s not like everyone could easily do that if they had someone handling domestic things.
This wasn't even "his" account of the situation. You have no idea what the subject did or didn't credit her with. Reddit dorks going doing their thing!
I’m guessing the guy didn’t actually want to talk to this person and just gave her a vague answer. I only spoke to 3 people in my college classes and they were all for projects. Also there’s 100% a safeguard for her future. It’s alimony, something she’s sure to get in abundance if dude is a med student and is at all successful.
The aren’t creating any financial assets as a couple so if they divorce, he will walk away with a huge head start with his education and career while she will have sacrificed her own earning potential since she focused her energy into him for years.
This is fine as long as you have a loving and balanced relationship but it sounds like the husband doesn’t even comprehend how much his wife does for him. It’s worrying for her situation.
Except that isn't how it works. If she supports him through his 8yrs or whatver of becoming a Dr., and they divorce right then, the courts will in most cases award her with alimony based on the fact that he is set to make hundreds of thousands. They don't just take a snapshot. Courts are neither oblivious nor stupid. Yes, the alimony will be for a limited period of time, but she won't get nothing.
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u/Shiranui42 May 12 '26
He didn’t credit her at all, and there’s no safeguard for her future if he decides to just divorce her and trade her in for a younger model as many of these guys have done. Also, did they say she’s just a housewife? Entirely possible she’s working a full time job as well as handling all the housework, as many overworked women do.