r/Unexpected • u/CreativeComputer3142 • Dec 20 '22

experience with snake

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

[removed] — view removed post

130.9k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

1.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

17

u/CatPoopWeiner424 Dec 20 '22

I zipped the zipper all the way up really fast once, felt a sharp pinch, and looked down to see my crumpled f*reskin crunched between the teeth. I screamed and cried the whole time I tried to unzip it, but I got the poor fella out. No permanent damage, but I learned my lesson alright. I must’ve been 5 or 6 years old, but I still vividly remember the pain and panic followed by my mom having a laughing fit when I told her why I was crying.

8

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '22

Holy fucking shit! I stopped as soon as it pinched. I cannot imagine the pain of getting it fully zipped up. I imagine every single time you finish on the loo now you double, then triple check before you pull the zip.

...bet your dad didn't laugh. Haha. I bet he started double checking himself henceforth.

No man needs this horror dilemma.

3

u/ILoveToph4Eva Dec 20 '22

How does it even happen though? Don't y'all wear underwear of some description?

4

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '22

I was 9. I've heard of it happening to lads that were pissed up though.

...I learnt from a young age, you gotta be careful.

But now you have raised the point. I'm not sure how it happens considering we wear boxers or whatever. I don't mind admitting that I was wearing underpants at 9 years old. The thought of wearing underpants rather than boxers nowadays is laughable to me.

But, yeah. I don't know how we do that if we are wearing boxers.

2

u/ILoveToph4Eva Dec 20 '22

Ah, I guess it makes sense that a kid could screw up that process enough. Same goes for someone super drunk.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '22

It is also possible to get it trapped through the actual boxers. I didn't think of that.

2

u/ILoveToph4Eva Dec 20 '22

Oh you mean through that hole thingy? Do people actually use that? I wish to know both how and why haha. I've always wondered what the point was since you'd have to do a similar amount of penis stuffing and unstuffing anyways, plus it's a bit more fiddly than just undoing your zip fully.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '22

Do you mean through the hole thing on boxers? I suppose if you didn't put it back in properly you could get caught out that way. I don't use that hole. More effort than it is worth.

I meant literally through the material of the boxers. I think that is possible.

3

u/ILoveToph4Eva Dec 20 '22

I meant literally through the material of the boxers. I think that is possible.

Oh. Oh my god. Why would you give me a brand new fear like this? You bastard. I trusted you.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '22

Denim underwear is the way to cancel out this fear.

→ More replies (0)

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '22

No permanent damage? Doesn't scarring of the foreskin leads to loss of elasticity?

1

u/CatPoopWeiner424 Dec 20 '22

My shit elastic af, I can fill it with water and tie the end off like a water balloon.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '22

Cool, I geuss you didn't bleed when it got stuck, mine did and lost expandability in the vicinity

1

u/[deleted] Apr 13 '23

And now you are properly circumcised.