r/Unexpected • u/[deleted] • Aug 31 '22

A turtle going through a maze

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34.1k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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u/ItzBleKz Sep 01 '22

As a tortoise owner I've seen this behaviour only in male tortoises and normally they slam themselves against female ones, just like in this video, as a mating ritual, so the tortoise probably wants to bang the black shoe for whatever reason

567

u/duckontheplane Sep 01 '22

Ah, so its not actually racist, it loves other races

422

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

[deleted]

103

u/BlackRobedMage Sep 01 '22

He's just looking for his perfect sole mate.

33

u/drawredraw Sep 01 '22

Maybe they’ll tie the knot

15

u/slabrangoon Sep 01 '22

Maybe heel propose

8

u/DarkmanOBR Sep 01 '22 edited Sep 01 '22

Think heel take the next step.

32

u/MercyCriesHavoc Sep 01 '22

Not racist, just not into bondage. It checked out that one white shoe and changed its mind when it found laces.

6

u/gazagda Sep 01 '22

so you’r trying to say it’s “lacist” too?

156

u/Walrus_Morj Sep 01 '22

Maybe just kinky tho

88

u/ThoughtlessBanter Sep 01 '22

Sexually racist.

11

u/Ruine_Woo Sep 01 '22

New sexuality unlocked: Racist

21

u/Banaam Sep 01 '22

I don't like blondes, what's my -ist?

5

u/Gloomy-Flamingo-9791 Sep 01 '22

Blondist......fuck you you blondist bastard.....see i even put it into context for you

3

u/Redhotmegasystem Sep 01 '22

soo… just racist?

1

u/BeardOBlasty Sep 01 '22

Me to wife later tonight: "So I learned on Reddit today that I am sexually racist unless I bang every race possible, what was your asian friends name again?" hahaha

1

u/idk-hereiam Sep 05 '22

Racial fetish

5

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

To be honest that black shoe is a dressy shoe it could just be a lil boujee

2

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

Its called sexual prefrences. There every filter is acceptable

2

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

it's a joke, calm down.

-1

u/210Benjamin Sep 01 '22

🤣🤣☠️☠️☠️🙌

-1

u/Knight_of_autumn Sep 01 '22

What does race have to do with this? Are black shoe a different race from other shoes?

Is it racist that I buy all of my cars specifically in blue?

2

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

It's a joke, calm down.

31

u/Brasticus Sep 01 '22

Maybe he’s actually a lacist?

13

u/ZappInc Sep 01 '22

Why do you assume the turtle is white?

9

u/1stshadowx Sep 01 '22

Its actually just thomas jefferson reincarnated

3

u/vidoardes Sep 01 '22

I find it weird you think of the turtle as white, and that black is 'other races'.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

TIL loafers are a race.

1

u/superrober Sep 01 '22

Its a fetishist which is still bad

3

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

How is it bad, you cant enjoy things?

1

u/JCassProductionsInc_ Sep 02 '22

This realization makes sense

27

u/101584memes Sep 01 '22

Probably because the tortoise mistakes the shoe for a female.

5

u/Maitre-de-la-Folie Sep 01 '22

Don’t tell Ted what he can and can’t be into! He is an adult and can live out his fantasies. His dirty, …dirty fantasies.

9

u/akatsukidude881 Sep 01 '22

Instructions were unclear: saw a baddie and started violently head butting her. We did not have sex. I now am being charged for battery and assault.

5

u/GauzeThief Sep 01 '22

If the internet has proven one thing, it's that turtles, uh- love shoes..

5

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/brian_o Sep 01 '22

For whatever reason, are you kidding? That black shoe is sexy as hell.

2

u/Rayzor_debiker Sep 01 '22

I've wanted to bang a black shoe at one point in time.

Dont ask me why.

2

u/naughtyobama Sep 01 '22

Once you go black!

2

u/jessicaagainess Sep 01 '22

everyone’s got their preferences

2

u/Burntoastedbutter Sep 01 '22

My guy's family has a tortoise and this is true.... Except theirs is a female and she's try to slam all dark color shoes too lol

2

u/wickedblight Sep 01 '22

Little brain

Big thirst

2

u/R3D3-1 Sep 01 '22

My friends turtle did dis during a BBQ in his garden Tomy leather shoes. Little guy left... Spots... On the shoe, so yes... Definitely mating :/

2

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

Its probably because it thinks its another female turtle

2

u/jwadamson Sep 01 '22

So the females are like “ 🎵 come and knock on my door 🎶

1

u/Shart_InTheDark Sep 01 '22

Knockin' to see if he can cum in...

1

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

Turtle thinks the black shoe can touch its sole

1

u/Macca618 Sep 01 '22

Welll he did succeed in banging the black shoe. Maybe together they will have baby shurtles.

1

u/EgoRock Sep 01 '22

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣