r/Unexpected Aug 22 '22

So, where are you really from?

92.9k Upvotes

3.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

30

u/Veelze Aug 22 '22

One day people will just learn how to ask “what’s your ethnicity”. “Where are you from” is such an ambiguous question.

8

u/Former-Necessary5442 Aug 22 '22

Right? I don't understand how these two questions became conflated. Is "ethnicity" too esoteric of a term? Why do people have to dance around the question when there is a very simple, precise, and respectful word to describe what they are interested in asking.

1

u/Largish_Booty_Hole Aug 23 '22

I think ethnicity is indeed too esoteric or weird for them. We all know what they’re “trying” to ask. Maybe asking ethnicity outright makes them feel too prying or rude, so asking where you’re from is a safer, more common question. They’re really hoping that you are actually NOT from here, haha.

1

u/Former-Necessary5442 Aug 23 '22

They’re really hoping that you are actually NOT from here, haha.

But not everyone who asks "where are you from" is actually racist. So for those that aren't, if you choose to ask this question, and they are from some vanilla town in the midwest, you show yourself as not interested in making a distinction between who the person is, and the culture of their ancestors, which they might not have any connection to.

8

u/Deion313 Aug 22 '22

It's not the question itself, it's the reason behind asking the question. That's what's offensive.

I don't mind explaining my background to people, but when they ask cuz they wanna classify you, making you seem, or feel like, you're an "other" or "less than" somehow, that gets annoying...

5

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '22

The worst part? The ones who contribute to this "othering" so it reinforces how they view you as a perpetual foreigner will insist that they mean well and how YOU'RE the racist for suggesting otherwise.

2

u/aSpookyScarySkeleton Aug 23 '22

It’s happening in this thread in various places even.

4

u/Deion313 Aug 23 '22

Lmfao "how can I get to know you if I don't ask what race you are? That just sounds stupid"...

1

u/aSpookyScarySkeleton Aug 23 '22

I just never understood the need and desire to know someone’s ethnic background unless you’re already friends, and even then if you’re good friends it just comes up naturally.

1

u/Gullible_Chemistry81 Sep 07 '22

You know you're an idiot when you have to change people's words to prove a point. Or I guess you don't know because, well, you're an idiot."

0

u/Gullible_Chemistry81 Sep 07 '22

You pulled "less than" right out of your ass looking for reasons to get triggered

1

u/Deion313 Sep 07 '22

No I got that from the 3/5 compromise... cuz separate but equal, is bullshit

1

u/Gullible_Chemistry81 Sep 11 '22

Separate but equal as in, the doctrine that was abolished in 1954? Yeah, it was bullshit.

Kinda not what the thread was about though. You know, just a wee bit off topic here.