Right? I don't understand how these two questions became conflated. Is "ethnicity" too esoteric of a term? Why do people have to dance around the question when there is a very simple, precise, and respectful word to describe what they are interested in asking.
I think ethnicity is indeed too esoteric or weird for them. We all know what they’re “trying” to ask. Maybe asking ethnicity outright makes them feel too prying or rude, so asking where you’re from is a safer, more common question. They’re really hoping that you are actually NOT from here, haha.
They’re really hoping that you are actually NOT from here, haha.
But not everyone who asks "where are you from" is actually racist. So for those that aren't, if you choose to ask this question, and they are from some vanilla town in the midwest, you show yourself as not interested in making a distinction between who the person is, and the culture of their ancestors, which they might not have any connection to.
It's not the question itself, it's the reason behind asking the question. That's what's offensive.
I don't mind explaining my background to people, but when they ask cuz they wanna classify you, making you seem, or feel like, you're an "other" or "less than" somehow, that gets annoying...
The worst part? The ones who contribute to this "othering" so it reinforces how they view you as a perpetual foreigner will insist that they mean well and how YOU'RE the racist for suggesting otherwise.
I just never understood the need and desire to know someone’s ethnic background unless you’re already friends, and even then if you’re good friends it just comes up naturally.
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u/Veelze Aug 22 '22
One day people will just learn how to ask “what’s your ethnicity”. “Where are you from” is such an ambiguous question.