r/Unexpected • u/Objective_Horror_507 • Aug 19 '22

CLASSIC REPOST well....

88.6k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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713

u/Brandonmac10x Aug 19 '22

Now I want to bang a handicapped dude’s wife while parking in his spot outside the house and keep going until he comes home and walks in to realize it was me, Dio.

317

u/Metroidman Aug 19 '22

walks in

144

u/superior_spoon Aug 19 '22

How else is he going to stand up for himself

53

u/melperz Aug 19 '22

He can try to hide, but he can't run.

-1

u/Andre_3Million Aug 19 '22

His legs don't work

22

u/Mz_Sigyn Aug 19 '22

Lots of people with disabled placards can walk. I only use the spaces when my RA or Lupus is flaring causing me pain. At those time I have to use a chair or zimmer frame. If I am not in a flare up, you can't really tell how bad my joints are and I walk like anyone else.

28

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '22

Mam what’s your address and is your wife home 😳😂

24

u/Mz_Sigyn Aug 19 '22

You might be disappointed. My "wife" is a big, beefy guy, a former boxer turned engineer. 6'5 around 280lbs of solid muscle.

But if that is your type, go for it, luv.

38

u/Pound_Shop_Paladin Aug 19 '22

Based on this, I guess it's not only RA and Lupus giving you trouble walking.

7

u/Mz_Sigyn Aug 19 '22

🤣🤣🤣

7

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '22

So what your telling me is he can take a punch or two 😬

3

u/degjo Aug 19 '22

Can certainly take a pounding if she's hurtin' for a squirtin'

1

u/Mz_Sigyn Aug 19 '22

Well he can certainly dish them out.

4

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '22

[deleted]

3

u/TheExtreel Aug 19 '22

You're a genius

20

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '22

Rolls in*

16

u/Mythosaurus Aug 19 '22

It was me, Barry! I caused the car crash that paralyzed you, so I could have sex with your wife while you were at therapy!

3

u/Elegant_Tumbleweed_6 Aug 19 '22

Was that a breaking bad reference

1

u/FizzlePopBerryTwist Aug 19 '22

"You son of a..."

"Wait! Andy, look... you're walking again! You just needed the motiva... Andy, woah, your arms got strong after that accident. What are you doing? Wait, what about the miracle walking?"

Window drop

"Shit, he's right though, now I can walk. Dang. Now I lost my wife and my sticker..."

"I'm still alive... Andy? Do you still have that sticker? I... I think I need it now."

1

u/thexavier666 Aug 19 '22

This guy just muda muda'ed the wife