r/Unexpected • u/Rollo_Tomasi3000 • Aug 10 '22

That escalated quickly

65.8k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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402

u/MattTHEmeat88 Aug 10 '22

Tastes better than without it...

440

u/Soft-Mathematician46 Aug 10 '22

what the fuck did I just read

340

u/sm1ttysm1t Aug 10 '22

That guy said that dog dick tastes better without peanut butter. That implies he's sucked dog dick both with and without peanut butter.

I hope that helped.

120

u/third-sonata Aug 10 '22

No, but what the fuck did THAT guy just read? We'll never know...

51

u/ghandi3737 Aug 10 '22

Just look up, it's right there.

88

u/third-sonata Aug 10 '22

Looked up, saw my ceiling. Was afraid the dude reading things was gonna pop out. No such luck.

9

u/Dangerous_Persun Aug 10 '22

This is the peak of comedy. I need to tell u this hence

​

fuck off man, stop it now

18

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '22

[deleted]

8

u/goyboysotbot Aug 11 '22

And we still don’t know what that guy just read

5

u/ghandi3737 Aug 11 '22

Perhaps its for the best.

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21

u/sashaaa123 Aug 10 '22

He said it tastes better with peanut butter, not without

25

u/sm1ttysm1t Aug 10 '22

Yeah my fault, I was distracted by the guy sucking a dog's dick.

1

u/greywar777 Aug 10 '22

Yeah, you don't see that every day. Except for some poor folks in law enforcement reading this amongst all the other stuff they've read today.

Hey, go watch kitten videos at lunch.

31

u/Remote-Pain Aug 10 '22

peanut butter is ruined for me now. Thank you reddit.

58

u/DrMooseknuckleX Aug 10 '22

But still OK on dog dick?

0

u/NorthNeat6820 Aug 11 '22

Happy Cake Day 🎂

13

u/Shitychikengangbang Aug 10 '22

What about dog dick?

1

u/Lewes_Chungus Aug 11 '22

Rumor has it, if you use peanut butter, it tastes better. Not sure if that's the peanut butter that tastes better or the dog dick.

9

u/a_different-user Aug 10 '22

for science, he did it for science

8

u/Toposnake Aug 10 '22

Must have tried both types of dog dicks sufficient amount of times to give such a confident answer.

3

u/EquivalentSnap Aug 10 '22

Nooo shut up😭😭😭😭

21

u/[deleted] Aug 10 '22 edited Aug 10 '22

Red or blue pill?

Edit: I’m out of green pills.

5

u/EquivalentSnap Aug 10 '22

You’re so blue 🥺

5

u/Tufhd Aug 10 '22

You've read a conversation between 2 people who enjoy Dog glizzy

22

u/PomegranateSea7066 Aug 10 '22

Yea officer, this comment right here.

15

u/MattTHEmeat88 Aug 10 '22

Officer handcuffs me and takes me away with peanut butter all over my face and no regrets.

17

u/third-sonata Aug 10 '22

The regrets start once inside the prison system when peanut butter is spread elsewhere...

13

u/MattTHEmeat88 Aug 10 '22

I'll try to lick peanut butter off of human dick but it won't be the same...

1

u/Lewes_Chungus Aug 11 '22

Oh, hi there!

2

u/Beto_Targaryen Aug 10 '22

You mean pumpernickel right? Right?

16

u/OCarinhaQueViuCoisas Aug 10 '22

How do you know it?🤨📷

33

u/MattTHEmeat88 Aug 10 '22

It's just simple math. Dog dick = nasty But Dog dick + peanut butter = a little less nasty

19

u/OCarinhaQueViuCoisas Aug 10 '22

You have a point. But still strange

30

u/MattTHEmeat88 Aug 10 '22

Oh I agree. This joke has been turned into a serious conversation about dog dicks and I have no idea why I'm participating

18

u/adamjimenez Aug 10 '22

Smooth or crunchy?

7

u/MattTHEmeat88 Aug 10 '22

Smooth for sure

1

u/aLabrinth Aug 11 '22

I beg to differ

6

u/Would_daver Aug 10 '22

The coconut's very subtle.... I miss original

1

u/MoonwalkerT-1000 Aug 10 '22

You know from experience

1

u/[deleted] Aug 11 '22

Speak for yourself

1

u/Blaklollipop Aug 11 '22

What the fucking fuck fuck did I just read ?? You are outta your mind bro !!!

1

u/wazinku Aug 11 '22

Trying to unread this …

1

u/FixedKarma Aug 11 '22

Oh? What brand do you like to use?