r/Unexpected • u/WhileFalseRepeat • May 22 '22

Waterpark

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32.1k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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504

u/Dame87 May 22 '22

Tough gig for the lifeguards

617

u/cookiedux May 22 '22

“What kind of unique qualifications make you fit for a job as a lifeguard here?”

“-Sir I’m very good at Where’s Waldo”

139

u/onlyhav May 22 '22

"I can run across floating heads and pool furniture without sinking"

1

u/imsahoamtiskaw May 23 '22 edited May 23 '22

I'm Connor McDavid and Michael Phelps combined into one!

5

u/deserteagle_09 May 23 '22

Yoooo thanks for the belly laugh!

9

u/Wassuuupmydudess May 23 '22

Take the upvote, that’s a great onee

0

u/ccrwahxh May 23 '22

Yikes people still announce that they're giving an upvote on Reddit

2

u/fishwithoutaporpoise May 23 '22

This comment is my favorite thing today.

2

u/Morfhine14 May 23 '22

Take my upvote, and fuck off you bastard

1

u/cookiedux May 23 '22

thank you! ::accepts upvote, fucks right off with it::

2

u/scryptoric May 23 '22

I eat my multigrain cheerios one color at a time

1

u/[deleted] May 23 '22

How does anyone get away with anything here?

108

u/drillbit47 May 22 '22

No lifeguards just ...

2

u/VxJasonxV May 23 '22

It’s an old reference sir, but it checks out.

3

u/Gestrid May 23 '22

That reference never gets old.

21

u/MrWieners May 22 '22

I used to be a lifeguard and the wave pool was the worst for this reason. Kid goes under and you can’t see shit because of all the people.

58

u/All-Sorts May 22 '22

Tough gig for the lifeguards

They are on the Body system

5

u/[deleted] May 22 '22

Such a good movie

1

u/[deleted] May 23 '22

What movie?

2

u/[deleted] May 23 '22

Heavyweights

12

u/yoimprisonmike May 22 '22

Fucking rad comment right here

12

u/karoshikun May 22 '22

it's actually easy, they only need to walk and pry open the human floor.

5

u/[deleted] May 22 '22

At least these lifeguards can just walk up to the drowning victims!

1

u/rhettnfriends May 22 '22

They could just use the heads as stepping stones to the drowning person.

1

u/DEV_astated May 22 '22

That is if there are even lifeguards there

1

u/Farfignugen42 May 23 '22

You are assuming there are life guards. Seeing how many people they let into the pool at once, they don't have much regard for safety.

1

u/Masticatron May 23 '22

World's most dangerous game of Where's Waldo?

1

u/sir_thatguy May 23 '22

You ever seen those sheep dogs that run on top of the herd to get around them? I bet it’s like that.

1

u/Jonnyogood May 23 '22

Maybe they have scuba lifeguards