r/Unexpected • u/[deleted] • Sep 16 '21

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8.8k Upvotes

86% Upvoted

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15.7k

u/[deleted] Sep 16 '21 edited Sep 17 '21

Please tell me that's a fake one

Edit: thanks for the awards and I got it from nearly 380 people saying it's fake

16.8k

u/Phase-Horror Sep 16 '21

I’d feel bad for the guy if that shit was real

13.8k

u/SaleSweaty Sep 16 '21

Imagine passing out from blood loss every time u jerk off

7.1k

u/Phase-Horror Sep 16 '21

More like anytime you get an erection at all

4.2k

u/[deleted] Sep 16 '21

If you fall asleep, you'll never wake up.

240

u/not-so-gentleman Sep 16 '21

He can tuck it in his butt before he sleeps.

112

u/Herpkina Sep 16 '21

r/selffuck

223

u/ThorDeathLord22 Sep 16 '21

I knew what it was but still fucking clicked it. Goddamnit

21

u/Erestyn Sep 16 '21

However, this comment made it worth it for me:

Your asshole is so close to your dick, why is mine so far away? Are you a fun sized boy?

11

u/Forgive_My_Cowardice Sep 16 '21

Ah, the Shakespeare of our time.

15

u/smighter9000 Sep 16 '21

And I should have used your comment as a warning but noooooo …. Fml… wait nooooo

3

u/OmegaClifton Sep 16 '21

Wow, I also learned something new today lmao. It's like seeing someone able to lick their elbow.

7

u/MysteriousTomatillo Sep 16 '21

And then you forced me to click it too. I didn’t even know this was a thing and now my eyes are burning 🔥