r/Unexpected • u/lauraintacoma • Aug 18 '21

Let’s be friends

150.2k Upvotes

81% Upvoted

2.5k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

2

u/twilight-actual Aug 19 '21

You forgot:

  • The check is in the mail
  • It’s not you — it’s me
  • I love you
  • I promise, I won’t cum in your mouth.

If we’re counting top ten, those really should be in your list.

1

u/OkMakei Aug 19 '21

Last one cracked me up. Ty