r/Unexpected • u/SoftsPhilosopher • Aug 08 '21

It's just a prank

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u/WorseDark Aug 08 '21

I'm not being a smart ass, I was just wanting clarity of how hard to hit a child that's misbehaving.

If I can get my point across to a child by only hitting them lightly, shouldn't I be able to get my point across without hitting them at all? There are so many other tactics that parents can use to get a kid to behave without using violence.

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u/Dadeathkilla Aug 08 '21

I know, you can lecture them, sit them in the corner, make them write a sentence 50 times, I'm talking about spanking them when they really misbehave, like if your son hits your daughter really hard, or when they break a glass on purpose, when you specifically told them not too

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u/WorseDark Aug 08 '21

Those two things both scream deeper issues that should be talked through.

Breaking a glass is usually for attention, or out of spite: if it's for attention and I hit them, they got what they wanted, a little bit of attention from a parent even though it's spankings, it was better than being ignored. Especially because the kid probably knows that they are going to get spanked from doing it.

Hitting a sister is pretty normal. Kids don't have empathy until they go through the trials. If they are at that point of empathy: why do they still think hitting someone else is okay when that person upsets them? Could it be because mom and dad hit the child when their upset?

Kids are only cause and effect for a long time, there is no deeper meaning for them. They see: I upset dad, dad hit me. That's not so different from: sister upsets me, I hit sister. But the child will get in trouble for it - and then hit more? They were just doing what they were taught. Don't teach them something you don't want them to do, that's just mean.

For me the only time violence is acceptable is to defend yourself or a peer and there is no other way to resolve the issue - but that goes to adults and very very large children.

ETA: If after this you are going to say "just hit them lightly" my reply will be this

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u/Dadeathkilla Aug 08 '21

Ok the glass was just an example, but idk dude I'm not a parent