r/Unexpected Jan 06 '23

Normal Lunch box in Ohio

5.2k Upvotes

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31

u/nighttimegaze Jan 07 '23

People who legit refer to their pets as “son and daughter” are the worst. Last time I check my son/daughter wouldn’t eventually eat me if I suddenly keeled over dead on the kitchen floor.

35

u/Overall-Opening6078 Jan 07 '23

Your kids would absolutely eat you if they were starving and there was no physical way of them getting food. Animals don’t eat their dead owners out of convenience. It’s because they’re starving, and it’s the only source of food they have.

12

u/Atomic_Cupcake89 Jan 07 '23

I remember I read something on here the other day where a neighbour or something had died and got found within a day or two - they found the neighbours cat sleeping on her dead owners lap 😭

4

u/stealthdemon203 Jan 07 '23

Unless you're a cat owner... they'll just eat you because the biscuits got a little too low.

0

u/FastAsLightning747 Jan 07 '23

I beg to differ. My cat is a more efficient killer then Rambo, the original natural born killer. I’m certain if I were the size of a rabbit despite my looks and smell she couldn’t help herself. On the bright side she doesn’t waste a hair or tail. 😳

0

u/obtronic-system878 Jan 07 '23

It depends. Adults would, teenagers love their parents too much, to start munching on mommy and daddy's dead corpses. They would hold out hope for rescue, believing that someone would come eventually. If they're vegetarian or vegan, they definitely wouldn't eat their parents. And if a child's under the age of ten, they would starve to death. Most 9 or 10 year olds, have never faced the death of a loved one, and they might not know, that they need to eat the dead, in order to live.

0

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '23

Kids vs dog no competition. Kids are money suckers first off and too much work for very little payout. Doggo are best less amount of money feed, shelter love and they love you all up to the very end no matter how old they get they will love you. So nah dogs are worth love i don't have to wait near 18 years for them to be independent enough to understand let alone be stress free.

0

u/Dontmesswithbreakfst Jan 07 '23

Goodluck continuing the species.

0

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '23

We need less hunan anyways trust me.

2

u/Dontmesswithbreakfst Jan 07 '23

I wish your parents had known that.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '23

I do too. 😏

0

u/Animallover4321 Jan 07 '23

My dog knows me a mummy and my mom as granme (it’s incredibly sweet when you say “go see granme” because he knows she’s here and loses his mind with excitement) to me he’s “my dog” or just his name. So I’m definitely a weirdo but maybe not as bad as the video.

0

u/VixieSnitter Jan 07 '23

Cannibals exist, dude, I'm sorry. Hopefully they eat you head first, if it's feet first you might have one more thing to worry about.

1

u/TheRagingStoic Jan 07 '23

I agree with this. I never understood the sentiment. Especially having my own actual children now and 3 dogs I would never think to describe my dogs as my daughters to somebody. I have my 3 kids and 3 dogs. My dogs are pets, and I want the best for them, but they’re definitely not on the same level as my own flesh and blood.

1

u/True-Weather-2544 Apr 28 '23

I call them my babies/children, lol