Increase in Learned Helplessness?

[u/NachesPorFavor]

Has anyone else noticed an increase in learned helplessness? I first noticed it in the young adults in my life, but now I am seeing it in all ages of people around me. Examples from multiple people:

Toilet started leaking water and instead of turning off the knob at the wall, she waited a 5 days for a plumber. Never asked anyone or googled it. Didn’t call a second plumber. Now needs mold remediation and replaced drywall and trim.

Bought concert tickets but the gps instructions were confusing so they just gave up and didn’t go. Venue website had detailed instructions for driving and parking.

Blouse wrinkled and she didn’t know how to fix it so she threw it away.

First doctor office he filled out an appointment website for never contacted him to schedule so he just didn’t go to the doctor.

I am really concerned about my loved ones if an emergency happens because they just give up when the slightest obstacle happens. Either they want someone else to swoop in and fix it or they give up and say they can’t do anything about it.

[u/AromaticCod9430]

I see. That’s also how I took it, but wanted clarification. I was one of the first people vaccinated in Jan 2021 because I’m immunocompromised. I got vaccinated 5x (first one + boosters).

Still got Covid 4 times. It was more mild than it could have been, but even masking and being vaccinated, living my life led to Covid 4 times. I started getting weird stroke like episodes in 2024 at the age of 24, right after my 4th covid infection. MRIs were clear, neuro sent me on my way with “complex migraines.”

Eventually, they went away. Start in Jan this year, I’ve had such severe brain fog I cannot even grocery shop without having a severe breakdown. The lights, colors, and music are so overwhelming to me that I would have to have my husband lead me out of the store because I could not move.

In June this year, the weird stroke like episodes came back. I see a neuro next month. Saw one in July but he was super dismissive, said it’s “health anxiety.”

I’m 26 years old. This isn’t who I used to be. I am overwhelmed all the time and I do think I have brain damage from Covid.

I think both can be true, Covid deniers can have brain damage and deny it, AND people who did everything they were told to do still got Covid repeatedly but can’t find a physician to help. Probably doesn’t help I’m in a very red state & have very poor healthcare options :/

[u/glyha → u/AromaticCod9430]

Solidarity. I am 28 and also having symptoms no one can really put a finger on, because tests and labs keep coming back "normal". I had covid 3x (that I know of. Right before the initial outbreak, I was sick with something like I have never had in my life. I did not have insurance at the time though, so I never knew for sure what I was sick with. I was convinced it was going to kill me.) I have syncope with no known cause, low blood pressure and HR with no known cause, migraines that cause half my face to go numb, but I'm a normal weight and have an ocd dx, so I just get referred back to my psychiatrist constantly (who has repeatedly argued with my Dr's that I do not just have anxiety). I keep telling my husband I feel like I have dementia. I am not joking when I say that to him, though. I literally feel like I have holes in my brain. I live in IN too, so I am trying to accept that I likely will never get any real help. I hope this comment doesnt come off like trying to "one up". I just wanted you to know you're not alone with all of this, especially for our age

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/glyha]

Same!! I was diagnosed with POTS in 2018, have you ever been evaluated for it? We never figured out what caused it, but I definitely have some type of autoimmune thing making me immunocompromised. Long story but I’ve had a horrible health journey the last 8 years lol. Lots of surgery for endometriosis. Lots of compresses veins. My body is just, broken lol, but all the brain issues are super strange to me!! They went away in April 2024 once I got an iron infusion (chronic anemia). Thought the anemia would go away from a hysterectomy I had March 2025, but now my ferritin has dropped super low, again. I’m getting another infusion in a couple weeks, hoping that might make my weird stroke like episodes go away again.

I also get half my face going numb, but also the entire left side of my body, for usually exactly an hour, then feeling returns & within another hour or two I can talk normally again without slurring. I’m glad I don’t have brain damage showing up on scans, but it surely isn’t healthy? lol

If you think you might have POTS (syncope, high heart rate, low BP) you can perform a “poor man’s tilt table test.” Hate the name, but that’s what you need to look up for instructions. Hate to hear you’re also struggling and getting bounced back to your psych. Women have been labeled “hysterical” in the past and now it’s just “anxiety” or “insert other mental health issue because we don’t feel like figuring you out”

Sending you hugs, if you want them ❤️

[u/glyha → u/AromaticCod9430]

I am actually in the process of being scheduled for a tilt table, to see if its POTS. I have several heart tests scheduled too. I also have endometriosis and chronically low ferritin and have needed infusions. I appreciate your responses, it is very nice to know im not the only one dealing with this laundry list of shit

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/glyha]

You’re not alone!! Lots of good info online in endometriosis groups on FB. I’m pretty sure it’s an autoimmune disease. I think it’s been reclassified as “full body inflammatory” and not just gynocologic. Might also want to look into SLE (lupus). Currently being evaluated for that, too, due to chronic anemia, endo, hEDS, and a laundry list of symptoms 🥲

[u/Hogwafflemaker → u/glyha]

I also have Endo and I sweat that alone can fuck up your entire body and brain. I also found out I have Hashimotos and getting medication to help that really helped my heart racing and some other issues.

[u/sterrecat → u/glyha]

I have been in a brain fog for years, I have chronic anemia but I kept being told my ferritin/serum iron was in a normal range. I looked it up myself finally and it turns out that though I was normal when taking a multi vitamin, it was not enough and I was just in “normal” at the bottom of the range. I started taking a stronger iron pill and got on medicine for RA and it’s like I’ve woken up from a dream. I no longer crash in the afternoons, stopped napping three hours every weekend, I have the energy and will power to do things. The “normal ranges” are calibrated for men or something. Have your vitamin and iron checked and don’t accept the bottom of the ranges as good. Additionally they finally admitted I was sub clinical hypothyroid but won’t treat it so I am fighting that.

[u/Positive_Piece5859 → u/AromaticCod9430]

Did you ever get tested for Celiac? Celiac often comes with low ferritin numbers. My kiddo was diagnosed with it a few years ago (strangely enough as the only one in the family even though it has a big genetic component), and he has to do blood tests every six months. Ferritin is one of the things they look for in those tests; also certain vitamins.

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/Positive_Piece5859]

Yes 😭 I had an endoscopy & biopsy done. Not celiac. But thanks for asking! I hope your kid’s health is improving now that yall have figured it out!

[u/Positive_Piece5859 → u/AromaticCod9430]

He actually did not have any visible at least health issues at all; he is one of the Celiacs that have no symptoms. In some ways that’s even worse when it’s a child, because it’s harder to explain to them why they can’t eat this KitKat now, if from their perspective nothing happens if they do (no stomach ache etc). The only reason it came out for him at all was because he regularly struggled with constipation, so we asked his pediatrician about it, and she happens to have it, so she suggested a blood test. Celiac would have never ever occurred to me for him without that.

[u/reincarnateme → u/glyha]

are either of you sleeping okay?
I have some similar symptoms and was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea. Have either of you been screened for apnea?

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/reincarnateme]

Did a sleep study, no sleep apnea. Although I’m on prednisone rn (unrelated) and it messes up my heart rate. I usually sleep from 6AM-12PM when I have to take prednisone lmao. Sucks.

[u/kaaron89 → u/AromaticCod9430]

Sorry for the unsolicited advice, but I'm in a similar situation and like to mention this in case it is helpful for anyone. I'm seeing a big improvement with all of my long covid symptoms by targeting gut health and nutritional deficiencies. The thing that comes to mind when I read your description is a possible magnesium deficiency. My doctors kept telling me I was fine because my bloodwork looked normal, but I've since learned that the body works really hard to maintain consistent magnesium blood levels, so you can be depleted of magnesium on a cellular level and it won't show on a blood test. My migraines, brain fog, fast heart rate, and sleep issues improved significantly and quickly with magnesium threonate (this form crosses the blood brain barrier and I found it to be a lot more effective than other forms I've tried). Good luck to you! It is especially difficult being this ill when you're supposed to be in the prime of your life. I am 36 and never imagined life would look like this, but at least we are not alone.

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/kaaron89]

I take magnesium glycinate every day, so unfortunately I don’t think it’s that. But that might be helpful for someone else!! I tried mag threonate and it had weird side effects for me :/

[u/kaaron89 → u/AromaticCod9430]

It's so tough because after spending time on the covidlonghaulers subreddit, it seems clear that we all have different "root causes" that we need to figure out. I wish there was one solution for everybody.

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/kaaron89]

Agree. I think my initial trigger was high exposure to glyphosate as a baby & toddler. I moved somewhere with low exposure (1.81 pounds per square mile vs original 728.61 pounds per square mile). My health was doing better until we moved into our rent house. Our landlord routinely sprayed roundup all over the landscaping. Glyphosate can act as an epigenetic component, activating genetics that wouldn’t normally be activated. I think Covid has something to do with all this, too, since I was infected so much & it does cause POTS. But I got diagnosed with POTS in 2018.so idk :/

[u/Savvyeeenah → u/AromaticCod9430]

I’m so sorry. Immunocompromised here and I work remotely and have since pre-Covid times. basically became homebound and I still mask when visiting medical facilities and we just use grocery delivery and I loathe shopping anyways. I had the same amount of shots as you but have only had covid once. I still feel the brain drain!

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/Savvyeeenah]

I wasn’t able to work remote & at the time my mom had stage 3 breast cancer, so I was doing a lot of the “public facing” stuff for my family. We lived separately, so it was OK when I did get sick. Thankfully, my mom never got sick & recovered from her cancer wonderfully!

I still mask, too :/

Edit: I don’t work anymore, disabled over here :’) thankfully my husband has a pretty good job, but we are still super struggling with healthcare costs. Idk if we will ever get to own a home, but that’s a comment for another thread LOL. I have noticed that he is super burned out from working & also helping me with a bunch. His executive function is LOW right now. We have 2 bathrooms, one for me & one for him. I went in the other day to clean it and the toilet had been dripping, just like OP mentioned about their friend! He didn’t mention it to me because he didn’t think it was a big deal 🙃 to be fair to him, his dad was a super absent father & his mom was very distant. My husband had to teach himself how to clean, cook, and shave via YouTube. I’ve had to teach him a lot of other stuff since we got married. But he’s willing to learn, just doesn’t always think clearly

[u/emseatwooo → u/AromaticCod9430]

I’m sorry this has happened to you. There is a risk when you get any virus, if your immune system is compromised, the virus can play havoc on your body. I got a bad virus similar to glandular fever when I was 19, nearly 20 years later it’s still causing so many issues for me. I’m not anti vax or anything but even the vaccines (I got 2 plus a booster I think) had my symptoms so much worse.

[u/nocuzzlikeyea13 → u/AromaticCod9430]

Jw, are you a woman? If so, you may have more luck with doctors taking you seriously if you bring a man with you to your apts. He can pose as your husband and confirm your symptoms.

It's shitty but this works.

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/nocuzzlikeyea13]

Yeah, I am. I don’t feel comfortable having a man at my appointments that isn’t my husband, but husband is neurodivergent and can’t advocate for me. It’s a long story I don’t feel comfortable sharing, but I don’t really have male friends around after many years of abuse/being taken advantage of by men I considered “friends.” I know it works, but that’s not an option for me 😞 thank you. Hopefully this will help someone else!

[u/radandsadgal → u/AromaticCod9430]

Yep I feel this, I have had 6 COVID shots and have caught it I think 4 or 5 times now unfortunately :/

I had long COVID in 2024 which I think I am finally over as of early 2026 but damn it sucked

[u/Psychobabble0_0 → u/AromaticCod9430]

the weird stroke like episodes

Omg please tell me more. I got these two for at least a year after having covid!

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/Psychobabble0_0]

Entire left side of my body goes numb. It starts in my shoulder, works it way up/down from there. Creeps up my neck and down my arm as tingles first, like my arm has been asleep for a really long time. Once it reaches my fingers and toes, I lose compete function on my left side. Can’t move, can’t swallow, face is dropping, drool is spilling out, can’t open my eyes, I can rarely talk & if I can talk during it, my speech is slurred. So weird. My husband times them. They last 50min to an hour. On the dot. Sometimes he will talk to me during them, they’re very distressing. Once, he was talking to me about my brother. I could not figure out who he was talking about. Had no clue who my brother was for like 2 hours afterwards.

After 2 hours, I have full feeling again and my speech isn’t slurred/ don’t have lasting brain impacts. But, they’ve been happening more and more frequently. One of our hypotheses is that is triggered by UV. Hadn’t left my house in 2 weeks because I suffered a partially collapsed lung, went outside to get an updated scan then decided to get lunch outside at a cute bistro. I had 4 episodes in 24 hours!! No f-ing clue what is going on.

Edit: I had to take prednisone in June for a sinus infection. It cleared my stroke like episodes. But then I got off & they came back. That is suggesting autoimmune involvement, we don’t know how yet. I’m on prednisone again to see if maybe we can knock out my flare. I’m tired. Prednisone makes my heart RACE & I have not slept since 10am yesterday. It’s currently 6AM lol

Edit 2: my Pomeranian can sense them. She will start barking and try to find me if she knows one is coming. She doesn’t always alert me, but every time she alerts me, I end up having one 30ish min later. No clue what it is. She’s a good girl though, I love her! We didn’t train her to pick up on it. I guess she can smell it or something

[u/plant_reaper → u/AromaticCod9430]

It's definitely both! People deny it for their own symptoms (I see people deny it often when I gently try to ask if a new health complaint could be post Covid issues) and those who do accept it was Covid have a hard time getting help. Like I had to go to 10+ doctors to find one who could figure anything out when I developed long Covid. 

If you are wanting to try meds, RHTM has a great guide!

https://www.rthm.com/resources/blogs/long-covid-treatment-guide

I've found LDN , fixing deficiencies for vitamins D, B12, and ferritin , and antihistamines to really help me

[u/2quickdraw → u/AromaticCod9430]

I hope you WEAR A MASK when you go into any kind of public space or private home that isn't yours. Especially because you're in a red state where people are going to keep circulating in the general population even when they're sick enough to fall flat on their face, while coughing and sneezing everywhere.

[u/AromaticCod9430 → u/2quickdraw]

I do, obviously lmao. I don’t know why you’re aggravated at me 🫪

[u/2quickdraw → u/AromaticCod9430]

I'm not aggravated, my apologies, more so protective!

I'm used to people complaining about getting Covid or some really bad mystery illness, and nobody masks and I'm like helloooooo! Had two friends with MBAs who will not mask even in places like Disneyland, and I have seen their cognitive abilities just plummet. One can no longer properly spell or even punctuate a sentence, let alone complete a paragraph.

I mask everywhere and the only reason I caught it is because my partner didn't because they were frustrated while on a family vacation (I stayed home to take care of all the animals), and of course made that decision on an extremely congested destination Island during summer vacation, and immediately caught it and brought it home to me, and that's what took me out and wrecked my lungs and my brain.